LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Breaking Up, Reconciliation & Coping > Breaks and Breaking Up

Ignoring her!!! Will it drive her crazy or drive her away??


Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

Like Tree48Likes
 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 1st December 2013, 7:38 PM   #1
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 102
Ignoring her!!! Will it drive her crazy or drive her away??

Ignoring calls, emails, text, social media

It's like you don't exist at all..

Will it drive her crazy or drive her away??

Discuss guys
JohnnyLoverBoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 7:46 PM   #2
Established Member
 
headinthecloud's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 508
NC is not a game. It's to heal yourself. Like you, your ex should no longer exist in your mind. All is in the past. Move forward and create a great future for yourself.
headinthecloud is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 7:48 PM   #3
Established Member
 
d0nnivain's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Northeastern USA
Posts: 32,999
It might drive her crazy. It might drive her away. However, it is not an effective technique to get her back. Trying to apply NC to get somebody back is the worst form of game playing.
d0nnivain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 8:04 PM   #4
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 4,755
I've always gone NC even years ago before I even knew what it was. I've always acted sane and gone NC after a breakup. It didn't bring the ex back though.
Sugarkane is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 8:12 PM   #5
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 102
All people here suggest to ignore the ex.. Isn't that playing a game too?

Also what if you are already healed? Is it ok to respond to an ex?
JohnnyLoverBoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 8:26 PM   #6
Established Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 2,397
It wont drive her crazy because she wanted out ...so it will be a relief not to have to talk to you. And how will it drive her away?? She already left. Cav
cavalier99 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 8:32 PM   #7
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 102
What if the guy decide to ask for a break because of the girl is being distance and cold and when you ask her she doesn't wanna go on anymore and after weeks of no contact she is messaging you again

Is it the same thing? Technically I ask for break then she decided not go on anymore. And now she message twice now. Every after 3 weeks.

And I want her back
JohnnyLoverBoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 8:43 PM   #8
Established Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 2,397
Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyLoverBoy View Post
What if the guy decide to ask for a break because of the girl is being distance and cold and when you ask her she doesn't wanna go on anymore and after weeks of no contact she is messaging you again

Is it the same thing? Technically I ask for break then she decided not go on anymore. And now she message twice now. Every after 3 weeks.

And I want her back
Well if she said that she doesnt want to go on ..seems pretty definitive to me.

But you could call her up like right now and ask if she wants to give it another go and most likey get rejected again. Then youll defintly know and can start NC for real. Cav
cavalier99 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 8:49 PM   #9
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 102
No I won't do that.. I never initiated contact with her..

But she already contacted me twice. I dont know why?.. I actually just wanted to be straight and ask her when she contacts again what does she really want. Its kinda though for me when I ignore her message cause she is a nice person..

we been no contact for 1 month and half now

Quote:
Originally Posted by cavalier99 View Post
Well if she said that she doesnt want to go on ..seems pretty definitive to me.

But you could call her up like right now and ask if she wants to give it another go and most likey get rejected again. Then youll defintly know and can start NC for real. Cav
JohnnyLoverBoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 9:20 PM   #10
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 908
Quote:
Originally Posted by aspiringuitarheroine View Post
Oh good, so you're just going to play games with her. Nice.

Call her and ask her to try again. If she says no, you can go NC properly and find someone who does want to be with you.
Alternatively, you just keep healing and moving on, and the next time she contacts you, tell her:

"I don't think of you as just a friend and you need to respect that. Please don't contact me unless you want to try again."

And then you REALLY make an attempt to move on.

No matter what you do, stop concerning yourself with how it affects her. She certainly doesn't care how she's affecting you.

There's no driving away someone that's already gone - but you are choosing to wallow and wait. You're going to end up in a world of pain if you keep it up.
Pfenixphire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 9:21 PM   #11
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 102
Who said I am playing games with her? As I said on the post. I'm the one asked for the break and she doesn't want to go on anymore after the break.. And now she is contacting me and im ignoring her.

I accepted and respect that she doesn't wanna go on anymore so I moved on. I am ignoring her because she might just wanna be friends and I cant give that and I dont know what her intention is messaging me.

and I am just gonna respond if she wants to reconcile.. All I am asking is if ignoring her will drive her away since I want her back.. The situation is abit confusing..

Quote:
Originally Posted by aspiringuitarheroine View Post
Oh good, so you're just going to play games with her. Nice.

Call her and ask her to try again. If she says no, you can go NC properly and find someone who does want to be with you.
JohnnyLoverBoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 9:28 PM   #12
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 102
Thanks! That's what I wanted to tell her but I dont know if its the right thing to do

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pfenixphire View Post
Alternatively, you just keep healing and moving on, and the next time she contacts you, tell her:

"I don't think of you as just a friend and you need to respect that. Please don't contact me unless you want to try again."

And then you REALLY make an attempt to move on.

No matter what you do, stop concerning yourself with how it affects her. She certainly doesn't care how she's affecting you.

There's no driving away someone that's already gone - but you are choosing to wallow and wait. You're going to end up in a world of pain if you keep it up.
JohnnyLoverBoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 9:32 PM   #13
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 908
Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyLoverBoy View Post
Who said I am playing games with her? As I said on the post. I'm the one asked for the break and she doesn't want to go on anymore after the break.. And now she is contacting me and im ignoring her.

I accepted and respect that she doesn't wanna go on anymore so I moved on. I am ignoring her because she might just wanna be friends and I cant give that and I dont know what her intention is messaging me.

and I am just gonna respond if she wants to reconcile.. All I am asking is if ignoring her will drive her away since I want her back.. The situation is abit confusing..
You may not realize it, but you're playing games. Maybe not with her, but with yourself.

The fact that you want her back means that you haven't really moved on - the fact that you're wondering if NC will drive her away or bring her back means that you haven't fully accepted the situation.

Yes, things can be confusing, but I'll let you in on some good insight: if she wanted you back, she'd let you know. There wouldn't be any ambiguity or confusion. The fact that she's tossing you breadcrumbs and testing the waters means that she's not really interested. Keep your silence and actually move on.

If she ever wants to try again, it'll only be only after you've stopped wanting her.
Pfenixphire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 9:34 PM   #14
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 908
Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyLoverBoy View Post
Thanks! That's what I wanted to tell her but I dont know if its the right thing to do
It's the only thing you can do.

To paraphrase Swingers:

You can't do anything to make her want to come back. In fact, anything you so will only make her NOT want to come back.
Pfenixphire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st December 2013, 9:34 PM   #15
Established Member
 
MrBossMan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 214
You're being immature.
MrBossMan is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Sometimes I drive myself crazy girlygirl100 Dating 10 7th June 2011 3:15 PM
I think he is trying to drive me crazy. intothevoid Breaks and Breaking Up 0 17th November 2007 3:21 PM
Wh does ignoring drive them crazy? forbidden fruit The Other Man / Woman 28 4th October 2007 9:39 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 5:19 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2018 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.