Heartbroken

[LaurenJ]

My boyfriend of 8 months just broke up with me.

 

But here's a little background on our relationship. He chased me for 6 months while I wanted nothing to do with him until finally one day it just clicked that I should give him a chance. I was his first serious relationship in 4 years and the first girl in 4 years he's taken home to meet his parents. Our relationship wasn't perfect but we hardly ever fought and got along really great. Then he found out he was going to have to move 3 hours away to Atlanta for work. We decided that we would try to make it work because it was only 3 hours. Then he found out the second week after he moves he's going to have to go to Kansas City for 6 weeks. He got super stressed out about starting this new job and he doesn't know how to handle stress well at all. So he broke up with me saying he needed to figure out this new job and just "do him". He doesn't want to be in a relationship with anyone. And I asked him if he still loved me. He said that it wasn't a fair question and I said I guess that means you don't. And he said no that's not what I'm saying, I'm saying it's not fair for me to tell you that I still love you but am breaking up with you.

 

We ended up leaving it as we will still be in contact while he's gone for the 6 weeks and then when he comes back to Atlanta see where we are.

 

I am completely devastated. Is it a bad idea to keep in contact? Am I just for longing the hurt? Or could it actually work out that after 6 weeks away he can decide he can have a relationship and he wants it to be me?

[LaurenJ]

I would really appreciate a response from anyone.

[Exitleft]

Yes, it is a bad idea to maintain contact. NC will give you space to get objective about the relationship and the issues, it will help you figure out what is next for you. And it's the only way to establish any clear boundaries. Talking while broken up or on a break is nothing but heartache, really.

 

Best of luck.