Real36 Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 (edited) I left my ex-bf in July after finding incriminating text messages. Suspicions of unfaithfulness and control issues proceeded my snooping for, well, the entire year long relationship. We originally met at work but last Spring he was let go for the job we shared and now works for another agency in town. We provides home support for a disabled man (intellectual disability) that I have responsibility for during the work day. This means that he has to come to my office to drop off necessary items when they are needed. Now, he could drop off a months worth of these items at a time but he doesn't, he provides one week at a time saying that the home finances only allow him to purchase them at this rate. He also is responsible for picking this individual for appointments or any other need that he has. This means that he is coming to my job at least once a week. Although we did not make our relationship known to him, the individual that we share care for instinctively knew and has shown that our break up has hurt him too. He tells me something about my ex every single day. He has told me that he is sad several times. I feel bad because the ind. seems hurt like a kid whose parents got divorced. A couple of weeks ago I was very sick and had to leave work for a few days. I received a text from my ex saying that he hoped I got better soon. The ind. had told him that I was sick. Then yesterday, while off for the Labor Day holiday, I get a text from my ex saying that the ind. keeps saying my name, am I alright? I didn't answer him for awhile so he texts again saying that he got an explantation so just have a good holiday. I text back that he was just excited about something fun that is going on next week and I am fine. Today and last week I text him to say that the ind. was out of some things that he needed. These were the only times I have contacted him since the break up. Both times he let me know what time he would be there to bring them so I was conveniently out of the office both times he delivered. Today, he called because I was not there when he dropped off to ask what time I would be back, I just told him to leave them with my supervisor. This is the first phone call in almost 2 months. We have to have some kind of contact on the behalf of the ind. but every time I hear something from him it sets me back from the progress I have made by leaving him and beginning to move on. I do not want our issues to cause problems at work but I am struggling to shrug off emotion when I have to see/talk to him. I want to have an amicable working relationship so that it doesn't affect my job or the ind. Any advice? Edited September 4, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
leafguy Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 Just stay the course. You are not in a position where NC sounds like an option, so keep it to work related and you are doing fine. It sounds like due to circumstance it is going to take a bit longer to heal because of the IND. You will make it through, just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Link to post Share on other sites
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