beautiful Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 There are many ways to abuse someone. Silent treatment is a form of abuse. So for all of you that are out there giving someone the "Silent Treatment"" it is very cruel. Everyone deserves to be heard and listened to. Speak your mind and inform your "ex" that you will not speak to them again if that is what you chose to do, but never ever just plain give another human being the "Silent Treatment". It is cruel . Just some food for thought. Link to post Share on other sites
rd1978 Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 well what if ,, your ex broke up with you ,, and you tell them that there will be no communtication if she doesnt want to work things out ,, so you tell her to do everything in her will NOT to call or contact me,, esp since this other guy is asking her to hang out and she willingly does,,,so she called for 5 days after that conversation,, i refused to awnser then she got the hint,, and started to go out everynight and drink for 2 weeks prob to get her mind off me and stop calling,, then 2 weeks went by and now she is trying to instant message me on the computer,, dont get me wrong i do want to work things out but i refuse to get strung along esp after 5 years,,,,, or i could be wrong and you mean that the dumper shouldnt just stop talking... Link to post Share on other sites
dudesomewhere Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 I'm not sure if it's about dumpers and dumpees but maybe just 2 ppl and one does the "ending"...of which ending can mean anything... so yeah, silent treatments are lame and I consider them immature...if done by the "ender". I do however feel the person on the receiving end of whatever game the "ender" plays should practice the silent treatment. Then it becomes the noblest form of retaliation Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyIam Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 If the relationship is about to be over, then I think the best term to use is "closure". So that both of them understand it is over and settle everything (have a clean break up) before moving on. Not giving "closure" is indeed very cruel! But then some people need more time to understand it is over, so one may feel they are given "the silent treatment". Only after the romance is gone, one really gets to see the kind of relationship they had. The care, the "meaning well"... the real qualities of the man you thought was "you one". That tells a lot about a person - the way of handling the break up! Link to post Share on other sites
emeraldcity Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 If the way a guy breaks up with you truly reflects the type of man he is - what do you think of a man that dumps a woman by email after a year of being together, gives her bs reasons for splitting, then drops off the face of the planet for half a year of so. Then suddenly, out of the blue, sends a rather large apology by email about his previous behavior - expecting to be absolved for it, 6 months after the break up occured? Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyIam Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 I shall tell you about how I am. I am ... resentful. I can understand logical, good reasons, I do, but I cannot make the pain go away. It doesn't make me hurt any less. I seem to keep the memory of pain vivid in my mind. To me there is no excuse for dissapearing into thin air after one one year! With or without the bs reason. He got scared and though exclusively about himself, didn't give a damn about the relationship - or to put it better, he cared more about his selfish needs than about the outcame of the relationship. And then you have the repplent ones.Those that came back, expecting for everything to be unchanged! It is about themselves all over again. They hated it out there all alone and now, with no consideration for your feelings or for it is best for you, ask for their relationship back! My ferm belief is that no relationship is the same after a break up. None. When you do decide to have another try, you need to start all over again. But you do not have the energy of the beginning to sustain you, nor the lust or attraction. Love is the only thing that can solve it. Strong love, determination from both! and it is different: different boundries, different levels of trust, different level of will to compromise. What I think about such a man? He has been weak, he has been selfish, he didn't love you enough to be honest and tell you why he chose to leave. He didn't care for you, for the pain you were in. You gave him your trust and love and he mistreated them. I am not saying it cannot work again between you two. Look into your heart and if you have faith in him as a man, not as a lover, if you understand his reasons for leaving the first time, then maybe... maybe it can work. Just know what to expect. "Him back into your life" is different from "the relationship the 2 of you had before he left!". Don't be afraid to fight for you two if you feel he may be the one, emerald! Have the courage to consider both options! Link to post Share on other sites
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