McGriff Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 Kidding! Today's her birthday and I let it go. REALLY hard on me. I did look at her Facebook and she changed her pic to a gorgeous birthday pic of her. Set me back. God damn I miss that girl. I'm in NC, but I'm not gonna lie---I wish she would come back. It sucks. I'm going out tonight in full force. I need to distract myself. The new girl is just not doing it. I can't believe I've given my heart away and got it crushed like this. SUCKS! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
McDonald Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 it sucks huh. At least you didnt send her a message. My ex's birthday was 5 weeks after we broke up. I sent her a happy birthday, then a full day later got a "thank you" Wasnt worth it. None of it seems like it was worth it anymore. We all wish they would come back, but what for? Is it to end the pain?? If so-- then it really isnt worth it because there is someone else who can end the pain as well. Someone who didnt leave you (if she did leave you, Im sorry but I dont know your breakup story). Link to post Share on other sites
GB25 Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 and your still looking at her facebook why? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author McGriff Posted June 2, 2013 Author Share Posted June 2, 2013 and your still looking at her facebook why? Moment of weakness. Shouldn't have done it. Know I shouldn't have done it. Did it anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
BustedUpInside Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 Moment of weakness. Shouldn't have done it. Know I shouldn't have done it. Did it anyway. Well at least that is all you did. I still think it was a moment of triumph! Nice work 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Giha Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 Nice job. Next time avoid FB and all will be well I'm so glad her birthday is in March...mine comes 3 weeks earlier so hopefully she won't contact me. I'll get there when I get there I s'pose... Link to post Share on other sites
dreamliver7 Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 I believe it requires a big heart to wish your ex and do it with a genuine thought without worrying whether that person acks the wish or not. As long as one genuinely and honestly meant the good wishes and keeps his expectations to that point only I see no harm why wishing someone you care/cared about should be so bad. If it's their ego that get's inflated or boosted by it and they don't want to respond then well too bad for them. It just makes you a better human than them then! Link to post Share on other sites
BrokenHeartedSavior Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 (edited) Mine was last month (B'day). She was too busy with her new guy. I wasn't even a moments thought. Hers (45th) is in August, I won't send a damn thing. She's not my problem anymore. Over is over, obviously. Life goes on..... Edited June 2, 2013 by BrokenHeartedSavior Grammar Link to post Share on other sites
BustedUpInside Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 Mine was last month (B'day). She was too busy with her new guy. I wasn't even a moments thought. Hers (45th) is in August, I won't send a damn thing. She's not my problem anymore. Over is over, obviously. Life goes on..... Happy Belated Birthday! On my ex's birthday, I am planning on buying myself a present:) I know, I know it seems petty but I am still going to do it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author McGriff Posted June 2, 2013 Author Share Posted June 2, 2013 I believe it requires a big heart to wish your ex and do it with a genuine thought without worrying whether that person acks the wish or not. As long as one genuinely and honestly meant the good wishes and keeps his expectations to that point only I see no harm why wishing someone you care/cared about should be so bad. If it's their ego that get's inflated or boosted by it and they don't want to respond then well too bad for them. It just makes you a better human than them then! Yeah, part of me feels like a complete jerk for not acknowledging, especially since I feel like I'm not being me. There's "what I should do" and "what authentic me would do", and I went with the first option. I don't like game playing, and me ignoring her special day seems assholish and gamey to me. She probably wouldn't have responded anyway, but I can't control that. Maybe I should have acknowledged, and then gone back into NC? Geez, I'm all over the place. All this second guessing and doubting is getting old. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamliver7 Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 Yeah, part of me feels like a complete jerk for not acknowledging, especially since I feel like I'm not being me. There's "what I should do" and "what authentic me would do", and I went with the first option. I don't like game playing, and me ignoring her special day seems assholish and gamey to me. She probably wouldn't have responded anyway, but I can't control that. Maybe I should have acknowledged, and then gone back into NC? Geez, I'm all over the place. All this second guessing and doubting is getting old. If put in a same situation as yours, I would have done the same thing. I'd rather do what my conscience tells me is the right thing to do rather than succumb to those egoistic games of who blinks first. I guess it's about being mature vs being kiddish by playing the who-blinks-first games. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 Yeah, part of me feels like a complete jerk for not acknowledging, especially since I feel like I'm not being me. There's "what I should do" and "what authentic me would do", and I went with the first option. I don't like game playing, and me ignoring her special day seems assholish and gamey to me. She probably wouldn't have responded anyway, but I can't control that. Maybe I should have acknowledged, and then gone back into NC? Geez, I'm all over the place. All this second guessing and doubting is getting old. The authentic you should also be an emotionally smart you. The authentic you can wish her but you should also weigh the pros and cons as to whether wishing her would be in YOUR best interest and not whether it seems assholish or gamey. There is nothing assholish and gamey when you must consider and place your emotional health and healing as your top priority. It's fine to be you but not at the expense of your emotional health. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
HuffmanMontana Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 Kidding! Today's her birthday and I let it go. REALLY hard on me. I did look at her Facebook and she changed her pic to a gorgeous birthday pic of her. Set me back. God damn I miss that girl. I'm in NC, but I'm not gonna lie---I wish she would come back. It sucks. I'm going out tonight in full force. I need to distract myself. The new girl is just not doing it. I can't believe I've given my heart away and got it crushed like this. SUCKS! Guess what. You broke NC by creeping her FB. You are not in NC. Link to post Share on other sites
StraylightRun24 Posted June 3, 2013 Share Posted June 3, 2013 McGriff I honestly think you did the right thing here. You didn't wish her a happy birthday because you have hopefully realized you are stuck in limbo with this woman and you want to start moving on. Not wishing her a happy birthday doesn't mean you aren't the bigger person...that's a load of BS! It took a lot of strength for you not to do it. You love this woman but you hopefully have started to accept this isn't emotionally healthy for you any more. That's why you didn't wish her a happy b-day not because you aren't the bigger person. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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