azgirl Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Can anyone help me on this one?? My guy has gotten colder and colder each day that we interact. Maybe some of you read my other thread "Fighting for the love of my life." I don't get this at all! Last night we got into a conversation about what is going on. I told him that I am sorry that he is having so many problems with his family and he said "Why? Why are you sorry?" And I said, "Because I care about you and I know this is hard on you. I'm just sorry." He said, "Well, don't be. It won't change anything." Then I tired to tell him that I wanted to be a friend to him right now because I think that is what he needs right now. He wasn't very nice to me at all. Told me that he wouldn't make any effort. Bitched me out about old issues between us. Bitched me out about my ex. Old one - not him. I have never known him to be cold and cruel, but he was last night. We still live together and I just want to be able to get along and treat each other like human beings until I can get out of there. 4 days ago he told his mom that he was still going to go to Michigan with me to meet my family. Last week, we hung out a couple of times and things seemed like they were improving. I don't get it!! The turning point came Monday after he found out about some crazy crap going on with his dad and that his grandpa is very ill. That's when he started being a s*** to me again. He's acting like I wronged HIM and treating me like a piece of garbage. How do I make him understand that there is nothing wrong with us getting along until I get my own place. We still have to see each other and interact! Help. Link to post Share on other sites
beautiful Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 Talk to him and see if you can find out what is really going on. If he doesen't want to talk about it right now , let it go and move on with your life for now. Do not allow him to treat you bad and you are still around excepting bad behavior. He will loose respect for you and now guy wants to be with a girl that he doesen't respect. Good Luck hun Link to post Share on other sites
Author azgirl Posted May 27, 2004 Author Share Posted May 27, 2004 Thanks, beautiful. I talked to him briefly last night. I told him that he is behaving as if I wronged HIM in some way and that his anger and hostility towards me is unacceptable and that I have NO IDEA where it is coming from or why. He tried to cut me off and said, "I don't want to talk about it." I said, "Gee, there's a surprise. But the bottom line is that we still live together for now and may for a while and I think we need to be able to get along." He said, "I agree." So that is where we are at. I think I'll just give him some time. Or I might write him a letter explaining some of this. None of his excuses make any sense. Really, truly. His reasoning is all jumbled and backwards. So maybe if I leave it alone for a while, he will either a) come around, or b) not come around and at least be able to talk about stuff. Either way, it's kind of a waiting game right now! Link to post Share on other sites
unreal Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 Originally posted by azgirl Thanks, beautiful. I talked to him briefly last night. I told him that he is behaving as if I wronged HIM in some way and that his anger and hostility towards me is unacceptable and that I have NO IDEA where it is coming from or why. He tried to cut me off and said, "I don't want to talk about it." I said, "Gee, there's a surprise. But the bottom line is that we still live together for now and may for a while and I think we need to be able to get along." He said, "I agree." So that is where we are at. I think I'll just give him some time. Or I might write him a letter explaining some of this. None of his excuses make any sense. Really, truly. His reasoning is all jumbled and backwards. So maybe if I leave it alone for a while, he will either a) come around, or b) not come around and at least be able to talk about stuff. Either way, it's kind of a waiting game right now! Well, you at least have a start. You told him that you think you should try and get along and he agreed. That is an important step believe it or not. Once the tension settles, then you two can really sit down and talk rationally. Link to post Share on other sites
Author azgirl Posted May 27, 2004 Author Share Posted May 27, 2004 You think? I mean, maybe if I can let some stuff go for a while and not talk about things everytime we see each other, then he won't be so edgy. Maybe if we can get along then we can regain some of the closeness that we had and he will realize that he is making a mistake? Another friend of mine on here told me not to be in a hurry to move out just yet. Give him some space on the "issues" and see what happens. Maybe he will come around? I hope so. Although not many people in my life would support us staying together, but I think if they knew it would make me happy, then they would get over it. I just can't see myself finding the kind of connection that I have with him, with another man. I love him with everything I have and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. Also, he's pretty young and very inexperienced when it comes to relationships. He knows that is how I feel about him. Maybe he is just afraid of that?? Maybe what we have scares him. He told me once that he found something with me that he didn't expect to find for another ten or fifteen years. That's not something you just throw out at someone and not mean. I often think that maybe he is just scared. What do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
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