Is my Ex trying to hurt me, or am I just imagining things?

[AnotherDay]

My Ex dumped me abruptly about a month ago, and did not respond well to my phone calls attempting to talk things out, so I decided to lay low. The thing is, we had planned a trip to Vegas with her family months prior, and the break up didn't happen until 2 days AFTER I purchased non-refundable tickets. She knew this and offered me the lose-lose options of going as "friends", or paying me back.

 

I rejected both and said instead that I would go with a couple of my buddies. A few weeks later, as my emotions calmed down, I gave serious consideration to asking her to meet up in Vegas, just to clear things up and end on a high note. A struggled with it for a long time, but ultimately decided not to, and also blocked her on Facebook.

 

I went to Vegas and on the second day, lo and behold, I randomly ran into her on the Strip. She didn't see me, but I reacted without thinking and put a hand on her shoulder. She gave me an awkward hug and introduced me to her family (it seemed uneasy for everyone), and gave the OK to my request for a chat.

 

She was clearly uncomfortable and had her guard up (I think she also believed I planned the meeting, but I didn't), but after realizing that I didn't have an agenda, she opened up. For awhile, we chatted like old times and had a few laughs. I explained that I blocked her on Facebook not out of spite, but for my own well-being. She suggested that I just unfriend her instead. I didn'

t think it was a big difference, so I complied. Eventually I apologized for my poor reading of her feelings, and she apologized for her tendency to hide them. We even shared a long, heartfelt hug that lasted about 20 seconds. We both said goodbye and good luck, and I gave her a kiss on the cheek (reactive, didn't plan on it, but my feelings for her were still quite strong) before parting ways.

 

I felt genuinely good about the meeting, and got the closure that I wanted. But things didn't end there. The next night, not even 24 hours later, I came across her AGAIN. What are the odds of that? She didn't see me (or at least pretended not to), and I let her pass without a word.

 

The next night was the worst however. Remember how I said that I switched from blocking her to unfriending her on Facebook? Well, if a person isn't blocked, Facebook still suggests them as a friend if you have many mutual acquaintances. She was the first to pop up on my feed, and she had changed her picture to one of her making out with another guy. I was devastated and confused because this is EXTREMELY uncharacteristic of her. She had never put up even a basic couple picture of us the entire 1.5 years we were together, so this was really fishy. I'm fairly certain she knew I would see the picture eventually. But I worry that in my less than stable emotional state, that I'm just making things up.

 

So is this a call for attention, an attempt to hurt me, an attempt to make me angry and look like the bad guy, or is she simply moving on and not taking my feelings into consideration? I'm so confused.

[CaliBabe]

I think she has moved on to a new relationship. I don't think she is trying to maliciously hurt you based on the friendly interaction between you two in Vegas. I'm sorry you had to see that.

[AKisBaked]

When I read the part where you saw her picture on your news feed on FB.. My heart dropped alittle for you bro (no homo) but I feel you for it. It kind of felt I was you for a moment and how you felt when you saw that picture. That must of sucked hairy dirty balls by to you seeing such a picture...

 

You seem like you are able to control your emotions very well and not jump to conclusions and react out of hate when something like this happens, you'd rather gather evidence or some sort of information to prove if it's true or not. Personally, if I saw that my ego would be hurt.. I would feel bad... But if she's doing something like this and you mentioned that she never really put up a picture of you and her when you 2 were together than she is just doing it this to get a rise out of you. She wants to see if you will react out jealousy.

 

But by her posting a picture like that just reflects alot about herself. She wants to be wild and free, then let her be. You do you.

[Chi townD]

Dude, just block her again. You don't need to see that crap. That was just uncalled for. Block her, maybe she'll buy a clue as to why you did it again.

 

Sorry dude. But you need to write her off. She doesn't exist to you anymore. She's already started to walk down her own path and you still need to find yours. She doesn't want to be with you any longer. So, why the hell would you want to hang around someone that wants nothing to do with you.

 

 

Time to heal and move on. She wanted you out of her life, so you give her exactly that. Even if she reaches out to you, ignore her. Remember, this was her choice, so she has to live with her decisions.

[AnotherDay]

Yeah, that's definitely what I have to do. Unfortunately Facebook has a restriction that you have to wait 48 hours to reblock someone that you've unblocked. A couple more hours and I can begin to lay this to rest.

[iouaname]

It may be intentional, it may not be, but I think it's definitely grounds for blocking her Facebook and just not looking back. I'm very sorry that you had to go through that I have had my ex blocked on Facebook since the breakup because I knew even just a regular profile picture change would be upsetting to see, I can't imagine how that must have felt.

[Seachelle1]

I don't think she is trying to hurt you, no. But I certainly don't think you should be putting yourself in a situation where she can hurt you because she will, again and again, because of where you are. And her intentions aren't what matter, it's you that matters. You have to protect yourself.

 

You should definitely block her and heal. I'm sorry you saw that. It's so hurtful, I know the feeling!

[denxnis]

I call it white trash syndrome.

 

My ex did something very similar, I couldn't tell whether or not she was doing it to make me jealous or not. Regardless posting something like that after a break-up is pretty low, I think you dodged a bullet.