How to get rid of the physical pain?

[xbabycakes]

Hi again, Its been 7 weeks now and in my heart there's still a bit of it clinging to the hope of him coming back.. I don't want to have this hope but I cant help it because I know in my head hes not.

 

Im really struggling every day still, Ive been prescribed anti depressants, but Im still in horrendous physical pain every day, you no that horrible evil butterfly's type pain in your stomach all the way up to your heart? How can I stop this :'( The only time it eased it a bit was when I got drunk a couple of weeks ago.

 

And the memorys, god, I keep thinking about all the wonderful times weve had in the last 3 years, and him being my first love/boyfriend/everything is making this so much worse I guess, and the change of living with him being so happy to being back at my parents is just too much for me to take, I thought we were going to be together forever :'( Sorry to ramble guys x

[lissa90]

Hey, I don't know what to say in terms of advice, only that I sympathise with you.

 

It sucks ass doesn't it. Everyone says times a healer, and dear god do I hate that expression, but its true. I hate that saying because right now, I want a quick fix. I either want to forget or be at the stage to move on.

 

Just keep going. Switch on to auto pilot. There will come a point where your mind stops playing those memories, where they don't give that horrible sicky feeling in your stomach.

 

:[. Let's hope it comes soon

[Mack05]

babycakes can I make a crazy suggestion? Is there a boxing club near you? Learning to box is an amazing discipline to learn. Especially after a breakup. I know it sounds nuts but you have no idea just how beneficial it would be.

[h3braica]

you're lucky it's only 3 yrs. mine was 10, he left me 5 mos after the marriage proposal just because his son doesn't like me and only want his mom for him. thought about killing myself a week after the dumped day because of the unbearable pain. since day 1 of BU the heavy feeling on my chest didn't left me. couldn't breathe and feel like dying. many times i woke up with thoughts of him and cried day and night hoping to ease the pain. it's as if i'm losing my mind everyday. it's been 3 mos and 2 weeks after BU. it lessen the pain as time goes by but i still cry, i don't know why BU keeps on rehearsing on my mind everyday and it's the most difficult part of it. im trying to forget everything trying to destruct my mind by doing something but it still haunts me.

 

to get rid of the pain i go out and jog everyday, kept my mind busy by reading forums til i get tired, i go out with friends on weekends for dinner, and recently enrolled in a culinary school hoping to progress after it ended.

 

the pain you were feeling right now is just normal and will soon fade away. im not there yet im still on the healing process but always hoping that everyday when i woke up i'd be better than yesterday and will smile again like it never happened.

 

hugs!

we will get through this.

[h3braica]

babycakes can I make a crazy suggestion? Is there a boxing club near you? Learning to box is an amazing discipline to learn. Especially after a breakup. I know it sounds nuts but you have no idea just how beneficial it would be.

 

 

this is true!

[siankat]

It is awful. Dont expect too much from yourself at this point, Macks idea is great. Out of all the things to do with him, do not contact him. If you have to get through the days and think you cant without texting calling him, do a close second ie look at his facebook or something just in the interim if you need to channel your obsession with him somewhere and if distracting yourself with other things only makes it worse. Just know by doing this you have shortened your recovery period. I felt awful too. Literally all i could do was get out of bed 20mins before work, then straight back to be after and on the net all night. Chain smoking (am a light/social smoker usually), caffeine, crying, stalking him online repeat cycle indefinitely. That was me. Im not there now. That was 3 months ago. I still have moments but if i get upset and really look at why i am upset i see the reasons more clearly: i am upset i was rejected, gigs ie some girl is getting the best of him now, i miss something only he did, etc But never once do i miss that i was treated badly You WILL get better and things will go on the upswing for you i promise. Be kind to yourself, when it gets too much, blow off steam, then get back to it, hunker down whatever. Think of it like being sick physically, you need to let nature take its course to heal you and help it a bit along the way. Thinking good thoughts for you!