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Still getting angry!!


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Thunderchild

Good Morning Everyone,

 

Once again, congratulations on surviving to another day. I’m seeing quite a lot of posters who are a bit down these days. May you find the strength you need to get through the next minute, hour, day, week etc. Another “tomorrow” has arrived and you are stronger for it.

 

I’m now on Day 50-something of full, hardcore, no nonsense No Contact with ex. I know that it is over 7 weeks – and, I haven’t had a ramble on here for about a month. Things seemed to be picking up until a couple of days ago. I’m losing weight, getting fitter, getting out and about, I’m meeting new people, taking up new activities – it was the local film club last night (oh dear, just another bunch of trendy-leftie, beardie-wierdie, open-toe-sandal, tree-hugging 6th Form Common Room Yank-Bashers [apologies to our cousin’s over the Pond]). Tomorrow night – it’s Ballroom Dancing (followed by my favourite Quiz Night). Unfortunately, I have two left feet, no co-ordination and shares in a shin guard factory (!) So, it ought to be fun.

 

A couple of says ago I started getting incredibly angry at my ex. I suppose it is just part of the healing cycle, but still the anger was quite intense – and my thoughts were really quite violent. My rational mind says she’s not worth the energy or effort, but on an emotional level I am still very p*ss*d off with what she did – and, especially the failure to take any kind of responsibility for her actions. Probably the most galling part is that she’ll most likely never face the consequences of her actions. Her excuses indicate deep denial and the new baby will deflect any negative thoughts she has about herself/her actions. The true story of how she got pregnant by someone behind my back will fade into the mists of denial and excuses. Her ‘apology’ and ‘contrition’ was just so many weasel-words to make her feel better about herself and minimise the damage to her own ego.

 

Sometimes, cheaters do prosper - and that’s just the way life is (Grrrr !)

 

Live Long & Prosper

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Negative thoughts are ok as long as they stay thoughts, lol i know what you mean. I have gone through a phase where I was afraid if I saw her in public i would throw a chair/ fist/ tree/school buss at her. I have never felt such anger in my life. I would never actually do anything like that but it's amazing how someone can hurt you so much that you have otherwise irrational thoughts.

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Well done pal, just keep on as you have been each day at a time. As you say you will only get stronger and feel better with each passing day.

 

Remember that it takes two people to make a relationship work, but it only takes one to ruin it. I wish you all the best for the future.

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