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Debating whether NC was right..


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Old 9th April 2013, 12:25 AM   #1
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Debating whether NC was right..

Heres the story..She's 21, I'm 23. We've been together for roughly 10 months.

At the beginning of February this year, we got into an a huge argument (one of the major three we've had so far.. and apparently final one), and she ended up breaking it off.

Silence ensues for about a week, until she contacted me first. We talk and talk like nothing happened, like the whole week of silence never happened. We talk like usual for about 3 weeks, until the beginning of March. No physical contact of any sort for those 3 weeks. She starts to act all distant suddenly.

This is when I assumed she had already started to move on and I should initiate NC (was hurt and looking on how to heal) but then her best friend tells me, that she's not over me and she's looking for a way to move on. So I continue talking to her, until she stops responding. I asked her what was up, and she says that we're not together anymore so she sees no need to respond. and that If I was hoping to get back with her in our current situation, I am dead wrong. NC began then.

24 days later today, I haven't been able to get her off my mind. First week NC was horrific. The following two weeks were progressive. But this week.. I can't stop thinking about her and all these what ifs.. Was she just being passive and wanted me to win her back? Or was this just some excuse to break it off? I've been so tempted to break NC this past 24 hours.. What do you guys think? Did I mess up big time? I really want to break NC right now.. Did I misinterpret when to use NC? I can't stand this feeling.
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Old 9th April 2013, 2:18 AM   #2
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I think you handled it just right. She said nothing about the situation would change currently. I think you probably have had some good time to reflect. It is your choice to break NC. A lot will tell you not to do it. But I know the urge. If your like me you will wonder what if until you try. So if you have learned what you need to to fix what you believe was wrong then go for it but just be careful of expectations. If she says your too late and that you blew your window of opportunity....the eff that. Just be careful make sure you really want her back AND that you can handle the negative side of what can happen.

Please keep me updated.
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Old 9th April 2013, 3:26 AM   #3
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Contacting the ex might be a bad idea when you're feeling worried or affected by any other negative emotions. Or generally, doing anything while you're experiencing strong emotions is a bad thing.

Most people break NC because they start panicing/getting worried because they feel something is going on right at this moment. I'd apply 50 to 50 rule to this (part of your feeling is true, part of it isn't).
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Old 9th April 2013, 4:28 AM   #4
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Honestly you should talk to her, I am sure she loves you and obviously that is something you feel as well.. Break NC and see what happens, If you still love her then shoot for it.
You've already lost? what more could you have to lose? ( emotionally speaking) give it a try, She may still love you as well. You may actually be able to fix things. It's worth a shot.
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Old 10th April 2013, 2:29 AM   #5
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Hey guys thanks for reading and replying.

Well an update..

So I broke NC today. Didn't say or ask anything about the break up or getting back together just yet. Just broke the ice and caught up for a little bit. She answered the call, we talked for a bit, and texted for a bit. Didn't really talk much. From my perspective, I feel like she has moved on, or at least it feels as if she's "talking" to another guy, but I dunno. What to do at this point...
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Old 10th April 2013, 3:20 AM   #6
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Well you gave it a shot!! good for you. Don't give up.. Forgiveness is more then just saying sorry (; take time.. She'll eventually come around if she loves you.. If not.. YOU don't need the cunt and can find someone so much better ^_^ just stay positive! It's hard but if you think about, puppies, kittens, caterpillars and deformed people.. You might feel better!
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Old 11th April 2013, 10:26 PM   #7
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Thanks. I appreciate the support.

and Update..

She has suddenly stopped responding to me. What is going on? We were texting each other, talking about nothing serious, and she hasn't responded in over 24 hours. Should I take that as a sign thats she's uninterested? -____- *Sigh*.
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