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my break up story, from a woman of 2 years, small kid involved.


Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

 
 
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Old 5th April 2013, 6:29 PM   #1
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my break up story, from a woman of 2 years, small kid involved.

hello these forums have been great! i would like some insight on my situation and whatever you may have to say.

i am 30 now and she is 23, we broke up 2 weeks ago. we were with each other for 20 months and lived together the majority of those, most of the times were great and we got along very well, had physical attraction, etc. she also has a 3 yo son that is not mine, but i have been around him since he was 18 months old and he thinks of me as dad and we do things together. i have always had a drinking problem and would ocassionally get drunk around her, and she despised that. i never hit her or cussed her out would just get drunk with my buddies. she threatened to move out several times if i didnt stop drinking and i did not, however when she finallly moved out about 2 months ago, i got into AA and have stopped drinking for good, we still saw each other after she moved out, but were no longer intimate. things were going ok and she knew that i was getting better and starting a good recovery. however about 2 weeks ago she said she wanted to take a break for two weeks just so she can have her space, i didnt like it but i agreed.
during taking a "break" she asked if i could watch her son for a friday night while she goes out with some girlfriends. i agreed and me and him had a good night. something in my gut told me she didnt go out with her friends, so i drove by her house early in the morning and there was a car parked there i didnt reconize at all. i asked her about it later on in the day and she said she didnt know whos it was, so i left well i returned later that day and found the same damn car there i knocked on the door and was furious, i wanted to know whos car it was and she wouldnt tell me. i said "is this it? is it over" she didnt answer. on my way home she texts me and says "obviously its over" .
the car has been there several other nights and i finally found out that it is one of her coworkers cars and this guy is now dating her. she doesnt want me to see her son anymore, and wants nothing to do with me.
me and this girl had plans of getting married, she had her son calling me daddy, we were like a family. she always said i was her "soulmate". if someone is your soulmate, how can you have a new guy in the picture and around your son in less than 2 weeks?!


hope this makes sense, any insight on this would be great! thank you for reading.
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Old 5th April 2013, 6:56 PM   #2
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People say things they don't mean. And sometimes they say things they mean, but later change their minds. Obviously she knew whose car it is...also not a very cool move of her getting you to babysit her son for her while she goes out. I don't believe in 'soul mates' because it's not real. Love is real, and people can love each other but I honestly and truly believe there is not any one specific person for anyone. People get married and then 50 years later they get a divorce. That is why I don't understand relationships and people and it is all confusing. However, in your situation, move on. Her son is young I hate to break it to you but he will forget about you, you should focus on yourself right now and make it through AA and get your life together and settled. Then when the time is right some other girl will walk into your life and you will be ready to start a family and have kids of your own with someone who didn't just use you as a babysitter. Also, when she said she wanted to take a break for a few weeks that kind of means she wants to see other people, so you can't get angry with her for seeing other people during those weeks. It is time for you to be selfish, and think about yourself and improve who you are.
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Old 11th April 2013, 10:24 PM   #3
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thanks for the reply, its been almost 2 weeks since i last saw her or talked to her and its getting better but today wasnt good at all. i would still do anything to have her and her son back in my life.
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Old 11th April 2013, 10:36 PM   #4
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Some days are worse than others, but it's alright. Just keep staying strong and focusing on yourself for now
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