Can't get over him?? Even though he lied

[Blondie8888]

Hey everyone I just need to vent really as its been 5 weeks since we broke up. We were long distance for a year just spent 3 months with him which to be honest wasn't the best time ever and looking back there was more cons than pros to him. He always looked after me when I was sick, we used to talk about the future he always hugged me and told me he loved me, held my hand etc

 

He was rushing into everything wanted to marry and everything I kept finding texts from other girls on his phone as it beeped the same girls name came up with a miss you then the next was saying that he owes this girl money

So I confronted him and we had a big argument he denied everything and ended up slapping me round the face. He emotionally abused me into thinking I was an angry untrusting person. He tried to control what I wore but I didn't let him he treated me more like a pet than a girlfriend. And the biggest thing was I also gave him some money for his debts this is why I was shocked at these texts from the girl.

Anyway I came home after living with him and he dumped me saying he isn't happy with me and I'm a bad person and I never trust him, again emotional abuse he told me after a week maybe he would get back with me if I changed but he needed space. He told me he has too many problems to sort out and when he has he will contact me when his better, he wouldnt tell me these problems. He also told me I'm weak and not brave.

I started to realise that I'm better than his rubbish and he controlled me so much I believed all this was my fault he tried to text me as a friend

But last week I lied to him and said I met someone else and to leave me alone

I said to him i am being brave and strong and telling you stay put my life.He told me I was a whore and hasn't contacted me since.

 

I'm feeling so hurt emotionally and still love him I know how can I love someone like him I'm angry with myself for ever going with him and angry for letting him get inside my head.

 

I'm glad I told him to leave me alone but it hurts and I still love him

How can I get over this and the emotional abuse???

[J_L_C]

Hey everyone I just need to vent really as its been 5 weeks since we broke up. We were long distance for a year just spent 3 months with him which to be honest wasn't the best time ever and looking back there was more cons than pros to him. He always looked after me when I was sick, we used to talk about the future he always hugged me and told me he loved me, held my hand etc

 

He was rushing into everything wanted to marry and everything I kept finding texts from other girls on his phone as it beeped the same girls name came up with a miss you then the next was saying that he owes this girl money

So I confronted him and we had a big argument he denied everything and ended up slapping me round the face. He emotionally abused me into thinking I was an angry untrusting person. He tried to control what I wore but I didn't let him he treated me more like a pet than a girlfriend. And the biggest thing was I also gave him some money for his debts this is why I was shocked at these texts from the girl.

Anyway I came home after living with him and he dumped me saying he isn't happy with me and I'm a bad person and I never trust him, again emotional abuse he told me after a week maybe he would get back with me if I changed but he needed space. He told me he has too many problems to sort out and when he has he will contact me when his better, he wouldnt tell me these problems. He also told me I'm weak and not brave.

I started to realise that I'm better than his rubbish and he controlled me so much I believed all this was my fault he tried to text me as a friend

But last week I lied to him and said I met someone else and to leave me alone

I said to him i am being brave and strong and telling you stay put my life.He told me I was a whore and hasn't contacted me since.

 

I'm feeling so hurt emotionally and still love him I know how can I love someone like him I'm angry with myself for ever going with him and angry for letting him get inside my head.

 

I'm glad I told him to leave me alone but it hurts and I still love him

How can I get over this and the emotional abuse???

 

Omigosh, this is horrible the way he's treated you. I essentially stopped reading once I saw that he physically hurt you. I'm so sorry hun. At that moment, that should have been the end for you. NOBODY should EVER stoop to physical abuse. You are SO MUCH BETTER than this lowlife. Who knows how much worse it could have gotten. He showed you who he really is as a person. You caught him in a lie and he couldn't handle the pressure. He's not worth it. Be happy you saw this, believe me! NOTHING and NOONE EVER deserves to be physically or emotionally abused. Love doesn't hurt.

[Blondie8888]

Thank you I haven't been able to confind in my family that he hit me

So I'm kind of suffering alone. My friends seem to think

I should be over it but I'm not I feel like I'm grieving a loss

But I do know he wasn't good for me but he got inside my head so much

And I am still so in love with him! I hate myself I just can't see the light

At the end of the tunnel. However me telling him to leave me

Alone is a big turning point

[OwlSoul]

I feel so bad reading your story. I cannot imagine being that horrible to someone who treats you well.

 

I'm feeling so hurt emotionally and still love him I know how can I love someone like him

Uh, love plays a bad trick with us. We start feeling it even more, when we feel that the beloved doesn't love us anymore. The only way to heal is to start being who you were before him. It sounds like he was controlling everything about you, cutting off what was emotionally filling you before.

 

I'm angry with myself for ever going with him and angry for letting him get inside my head.

Anger is actually good, it gives power and helps to the healing process. But do not put this anger towards yourself, use it for something else.

 

How can I get over this and the emotional abuse???

It is the emptiness inside of you left by him. Doing something which you used to do (or perhaps never ever tried) could help you really. Talk more to friends, familly, or just people on this forum even about nothing.