Thunderchild Posted March 3, 2013 Share Posted March 3, 2013 Good Morning/Afternoon Everyone Once again, congratulations on surviving to another day. Yesterday's tomorrow has arrived and you are a day wiser and stronger. Thank you for reading another instalment of my ramblings. After all this, I might take up blogging. Well, day 15. I keep hearing that the 2-4 week mark is particularly difficult with No Contact. So, I'm sitting here writing with a degree of trepidation. I don't particularly want to relapse back to the nightmare of Days 1-6. Thanks to Tara for the explanation – looks like No Contact also means cold turkey. Well, if its gotta be done, let’s get it over with and move on. Got about 4 hours sleep last night - it was 6 the night before. Had another couple of hours after brekkie and feel a lot better for it. Still, sleep not broken by anxious dreams. Still at the stage where I’m replaying a lot of stuff over in my mind; trying to make some sense of it all. The logical mind says I’ll never trust her again and that she’s highly unlikely to break out of her sense of denial. She believed/still believes (?) that she can justify cheating on me (therefore, anyone). So, once a cheater always a cheater I’m afraid. The degree of narcissism or self-absorption must be astonishing, plus she has her sprog (by the guy she cheated with) to smother/distract her conscience. She won’t really give her cheating a second thought. And, that is so annoying!!! I’m not a great believer in karma. A mumbled, half-assed apology – which, I refused to accept – mealie-mouthed platitudes, weasel words and manufactured “excuses” to justify herself and avoid taking responsibility for her actions and choices. Well, add Lost Respect to Lost Trust. Another cynical and selfish method of avoiding responsibility by trying to blame me for her cheating. Nice! <Steps down from soap box – rant over – now, for some messages from our Sponsors> So, another day another dollar. I’ll start reviewing the manuscript I was on the verge of completing before the bomb went off. It’s kinda hard getting your mind in the creative zone when you really wanna kill someone. Luckily, the manuscript for the third novel was already done and edited before the bomb. It’s in Quality Control at the publishers and it’s no biggie to make any new corrections that they want. Novel four has two chapters to complete and I just can’t get into the zone. Funnily, one of the sub-plots is about a woman who has been tempted to cheat and is stricken with conscience (!) So, I’ll have a run-through of what I have, and, hopefully, pick up a bit of momentum that will throw me into creativity. Plus, I’ve got a short story doing very well in the UK. The publisher is now making noises about picking up the novel/manuscript that it was taken from. Well, if I’m looking to get over a break up by throwing myself into my work, I’ve certainly got the perfect opportunity. <Sighs> Live long and Prosper. Link to post Share on other sites
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