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Ex messaged me. We made plans. What now?


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Dated him for 2 and a half years, I broke it off mid-July. We had lots of good times and were best friends, but he cheated, and I cheated. By the end, I didn't know what I wanted anymore.

Contact after that was horrible. I tried texting him. He said he had no interest being with me again and didn't love me during our relationship, always thinking of being with someone else. Basically, he said, arguing with me about it was a waste of his time.

 

So, fine. Left him alone.

This past week, he's started liking my FB pictures, which is weird because he never really did it when we dated. Sunday, got a FB message where he was obviously flirting. I thought, what the heck, and I took it and ran with it. After flirting, he asked what I'd been up to, and we eventually got down to why, exactly, we were talking to each other.

 

His reason: Working an hour away from college this whole semester with no one around "could give multiple reasons to drive me to talk to you." Pretty much implied that talking to me made the loneliness better.

My reason: I was curious to see where it'd go because yeah, we did each other wrong, but I hate how it ended.

 

He responded saying that when we texted a month ago, he was a jerk and said "things that needed to be said, some that were exaggerated." He said, "I've been honest with you about my feelings or so I thought. Point is, I didn't want you to think I was interested whatsoever." Well, that stung... but I didn't have the guts to ask if he still felt that way.

We started talking about the cheating, and he said he was willing to overlook what I did right before we broke up. I said, look, I know this was a mess, but you were my best friend for years, and I'll always care for you. At the least, I want to hang out, catch up, whatever.

He said, I'd like that, too. We made plans for Saturday. He said he enjoyed talking to me, he'd text me, and good night.

 

This all happened Sunday. Haven't gotten a text yet. Still trying to figure this out. I know for a fact if he wasn't interested in me, he wouldn't want to see me or talk to me whatsoever. Some advice I've gotten says he definitely still cares about me. Other advice just says he wants someone to screw.

I personally don't know what I want, but I don't want to be "just friends," and I don't want to see him with anyone else. This is complicated.

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Yes, I see where you could be quite confused. Been hurt once, don't want to be hurt again. Well, from my own experience, I know I would DIE to have my ex message me out of the blue. She is currently in a new relationship, as of yesterday (killing me, I slept 2 hours, maybe).

 

Where I'm getting, is if this is something you've wanted, I say give it a shot. I'm obviously a guy, so I'm speaking for myself and through my opinions. I know not having my girl has opened my eyes, and if she decided to leave her new guy and come back, I'd be here with open arms, because I realize what she meant to me now that she's not there (and I should've seen that beforehand...in my case, I did the same thing in this relationship to screw it up as I did in the last).

 

If it is something you yearn for, go for it

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He responded saying that when we texted a month ago, he was a jerk and said "things that needed to be said, some that were exaggerated." He said, "I've been honest with you about my feelings or so I thought. Point is, I didn't want you to think I was interested whatsoever."

 

This is complicated.

 

no it isn't complicated. he told you what you need to know.

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