sigh Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 hi Eva, i need u again tonight. i think i told u that my best friend and my ex boyfriend are very good friends. My ex tolld me he likes her although she claims shes just good friends with him.They spend more time with each other than my best friend spends with me. My ex told me a month back that he likes that girl and i didnt talk to him even in a friendly way for about a month. Just gave him a friendly hi today to see if i could take it now. But here i am, hurt again. When i saw them together today, i was hurt all over again. I told u that its already been a year but his cheating and abuse continues to hurt me. I want to be superficially friends with him so that i dont lose my best friend but i just cant. Even a simple hi to him makes me mad. Im just amazed at myself. How can I b jealous and mad inspite of knowing wat he did to me? and after a whole year? and even when i hv a good life to myself? Gosh, im scared. im really scared. and im hurt. And how shud i act around him? coz then i act mean with my best friend, just because she spends so much time with him. wat to do? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 This sounds like a communication that ought to be in a Private Message, since it's directed to one member and not to the entire forum. Join LoveShack (for free) so you can use this function or risk this type of personal message being deleted. When you have problems like this, unless there is a compelling reason that just one member is best qualified to help you, you are better off letting as many people as possible give you their views. LoveShack does not encourage people to single out people to seek advice from unless a special relationship has been formed. Many thanks for your cooperation. Link to post Share on other sites
sigh Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 Actually i think shes the only one who knows a bit of my story. So was hoping that she doesnt miss the message if she visits the forum. Anyones help would b appreciated though Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 I don't think you can be friends with either of them. Not with him because really, he was a pr*ck to you. I don't think you can be friends with her either. I'm no rocket scientist, but even I can see where this is heading. Do you really want to be friends with someone who claims to be your best friend and ends up being girlfriend to the ex who cheated on you and abused you? Even if things did end on good terms, I know that my best friend would never even entertain the thought of going with my ex unless I gave her permission (which I wouldn't). How do I know this? Because we've been through a lot and we swore to be honest with each other no matter what. Yeah, we've had plenty of disagreements and knockdown drag out fights, but we can always count on each other to be honest and respectful of each other. I forgot to ask, but have you told your friend how you feel about her and the ex seeing each other? If so, how did she respond? Link to post Share on other sites
sigh Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 yes i have told her a hundred times but she says her relationship with his is a different thing altogether. And that she was friends with him too, independently (which is actually true), which is why im trying so hard to be nice to her atleast. I dont talk to my ex though. Today im finding it really hard..i cried out loud 15 mins ago. I cant take it. Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 Now that you're out of the way. Look, you've told her how you feel and you got your answer. He is more important to her than you. She isn't your best friend. Why are you still friends with her? Is it so that you can stay connected to your ex? Seems to me like you're putting yourself through a whole heck of a lot of drama for two people that don't really give a rat's a** about you. Link to post Share on other sites
sigh Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 yea i guess ure right.. But wat shud i do? tell her that i cant be friends with her anymore? or just act casual (but still taunt her at times?) Its more awkward not to talk to her because we're in the same class and hv been friends for 4 yrs...spoiling it over a guy?? but yes i do think hes more important to her now Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 You don't have to rehash things over with her. You must be tired of it at this point especially when you keep getting the same answer. Just be casual and let the friendship die a natural death. Some friendships just end. It's too bad that it has to end over a guy, but really, are you willing to continue living in agony every time you see them together just so you can remain friends with someone who doesn't care as much for you as you do for her? Link to post Share on other sites
sigh Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 thats exactly whats making me sad...the friendship is dying...but if she doesnt realize it, i cant be on my knees for it...i guess it has to end..itself Link to post Share on other sites
sigh Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 thanx buddy... Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 Everything feels like crap now, but it really does get better. Link to post Share on other sites
sigh Posted March 12, 2004 Share Posted March 12, 2004 i broke off with my friend today...well i just t old her i cant be the same and she was ok with that...she said she cant spoil her relationship with my ex and that hes alone and needs her..and she says im the one whos spoiliing our friendship and not her...im sad...really sad...and terribly hurt... Link to post Share on other sites
sigh Posted March 13, 2004 Share Posted March 13, 2004 And i thought i had some really nice replies waiting for me:( Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts