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Is my ex girlfriend still angry with me?


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Lowdragmaro11

Well long story short, I broke up with my ex-girlfriend of 1.5 years about 2 months ago. When this happened she did still love me and tried getting me back, but in the end she gave up when I told her I just did not feel like I loved her anymore. She told me that she could never trust me again and did not want to be with someone who did not not love her. We said our goodbye's and I did not text her for a month.

 

Then one month later she went back to her old ex-boyfriend as a rebound which she always uses when she feel's lonley or desprete to be with someone. Even my friend who has been friends with her for over 5 years said she is not in love with him and always uses him as a backup. Well a few weeks later I wanted to contact her again and see how she was doing, but my friend had asked her how she was and she told my friend that she was "happy" and wanted nothing to do with me. I know my ex well enough that she was not happy. She never was in her life. Always had problems and low self-esteem and faked all her feelings to everyone accept me. If she was why would she go back to a guy she did not love at all? My friend told me she still posts random love songs on facebook about "how she tried" and ect.

 

I tried to add her on facebook and be friends but she just put it on ignore and not deny it. She basically deleted all of my pics on there also. I sent her a text saying if she was willing to give it one more shot and if she did not then I would respect her and not contact her anymore. But she never replied to the text. So in the end I figured I should just stop contact with her and I have for a month now. I still feel like I have feelings for her but not like before. So I am now searching for new people, but my main question is, is she still angry with me after 2 months? And what was the point of going back to an old ex that she just uses and has always been on and off because he treated her bad?

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BewitchedandBothered

You dumped her , what do you expect? let her go and let her be happy. She isn't responding-shouldn't that tell you something?

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Lowdragmaro11
You dumped her , what do you expect? let her go and let her be happy. She isn't responding-shouldn't that tell you something?

 

 

Thats why I stopped replying to her, I figured she still has too much linger feelings to talk to me and did not want to make it worse for her, but Like I said. If she wants to be happy why would she go back to someone who did not respect her enough?

Edited by Lowdragmaro11
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Philosoraptor

She is hurting and doing what it takes to heal. Both the dumper and dumpee are hurt at the end of the relationship and do what it takes to move on and fix their wounds.

 

By going back to someone she wasn't happy with before she is likely looking for some stability in her life.

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Lowdragmaro11

Would she ever even consider being a friend again? I was with her for over a year and she not just my girlfriend but a bestfriend. I still hold our memories with happiness. Or did I just hurt her too much that she could never give me any time of communication again?

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BewitchedandBothered

Give it time; it's still too soon. And have consideration for her current fellow; dont text/contact her. The ball is in her court.

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If she showed her real self to you, and you told her that you do not love her, what is she supposed to do? If you dumped her, why on earth would she want to be your friend?

 

And if she is looking for comfort in someone else, so what? You left her! Let her go!!!

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BewitchedandBothered
If she showed her real self to you, and you told her that you do not love her, what is she supposed to do? If you dumped her, why on earth would she want to be your friend?

 

And if she is looking for comfort in someone else, so what? You left her! Let her go!!!

 

Amen to that. Take it from someone who was dumped and my ex had the nerve to contact me after to ask how I was. How was I? I was dumped! It's a GREAT feeling to be on the receiving end of that! Maybe down the road she will decide, but if she is dating someone, that someone might not feel comfortable with her talking to her ex. let her contact you, but I wouldn't wait around.

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Lowdragmaro11

Well I was in this situation before when my first ex broke up with me. I wanted to contact her to let her know I was still there for her. And this "new guy" is no one new. She has been on and off with him for years and when we were together she told me personally that she used him when she was lonely. She cares for him like a best friend not like a lover. But it has nothing to do with him, I guess she just needed anyone to make her feel better and get over me. But is 2 months too soon to try and contact her or will she need a lot more time to get over me?

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BewitchedandBothered
Well I was in this situation before when my first ex broke up with me. I wanted to contact her to let her know I was still there for her. And this "new guy" is no one new. She has been on and off with him for years and when we were together she told me personally that she used him when she was lonely. She cares for him like a best friend not like a lover. But it has nothing to do with him, I guess she just needed anyone to make her feel better and get over me. But is 2 months too soon to try and contact her or will she need a lot more time to get over me?

Give her space. if she is ready she will contact you.

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Lowdragmaro11

Well I doubt she will, she's one of the most stubborn people and rarely admits when she's wrong. The last thing I expect for her is to want to be friends after I broke her heart. But I will let time tell and give her the space.

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BewitchedandBothered
Well I doubt she will, she's one of the most stubborn people and rarely admits when she's wrong. The last thing I expect for her is to want to be friends after I broke her heart. But I will let time tell and give her the space.

maybe she doesn't feel she is wrong. I get where she is coming from. I am glad you will let time tell and give her the space she needs.

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Lowdragmaro11

I did not mean she is wrong, just that she never admits or gives in to things she does not think she should. I just feel like she will never talk to me because she is scared she might still have feelings for me and does not want to end up giving me another chance and thinks I will end up hurting her.

 

The funny thing is she always use to complain about how her ex's never talk to her after she dumped them and how she wanted to still be friends with them. And then when I did the same to her, she totally ignores me and treats me like I am the worst person in the world.

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BewitchedandBothered
I did not mean she is wrong, just that she never admits or gives in to things she does not think she should. I just feel like she will never talk to me because she is scared she might still have feelings for me and does not want to end up giving me another chance and thinks I will end up hurting her.

 

The funny thing is she always use to complain about how her ex's never talk to her after she dumped them and how she wanted to still be friends with them. And then when I did the same to her, she totally ignores me and treats me like I am the worst person in the world.

She complained to you that her ex's don't want to talk to her after she dumped them? This was an actual concern of hers? Dude....Leave this one alone;) If she has feelings for you, she will contact you.

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Lowdragmaro11
She complained to you that her ex's don't want to talk to her after she dumped them? This was an actual concern of hers? Dude....Leave this one alone;) If she has feelings for you, she will contact you.

 

Yes, I mean not that she wanted them too but she never understood why they always ignored her. O well I guess she knows know. And okay your right, I still doubt she will no matter how much she would want to talk to me again.

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sweetheart5381
I did not mean she is wrong, just that she never admits or gives in to things she does not think she should. I just feel like she will never talk to me because she is scared she might still have feelings for me and does not want to end up giving me another chance and thinks I will end up hurting her.

 

The funny thing is she always use to complain about how her ex's never talk to her after she dumped them and how she wanted to still be friends with them. And then when I did the same to her, she totally ignores me and treats me like I am the worst person in the world.

 

Maybe you are playing a game with her - break up with her, see how she treats you... to see if you really mean something to her... maybe it hurts you now that she ignores you. Suck it up buttercup.

 

Otherwise, you would just leave her alone. You broke her heart. DONT analyze her now. You lost that right/ability when you dumped her.

 

You're all out of data to analyze now. Your choice, if she wasnt worth your thought then, then don't plan on getting any now.

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Lowdragmaro11
Maybe you are playing a game with her - break up with her, see how she treats you... to see if you really mean something to her... maybe it hurts you now that she ignores you. Suck it up buttercup.

 

Otherwise, you would just leave her alone. You broke her heart. DONT analyze her now. You lost that right/ability when you dumped her.

 

You're all out of data to analyze now. Your choice, if she wasnt worth your thought then, then don't plan on getting any now.

 

 

Nope no games. I contacted her because I did not want to make her feel like I had no feelings for what we had, I wanted to let her know even though I did not have the same feelings that I would always be there if shen needed support. I know I broke her heart, but at the time I had no other choice, If I had still been with her It would have hurt her much more seeing that I was unhappy but still with her, and that would make her feel worse. I came on here to ask if It was okay to talk to her as a friend, and I found out the answer was a no.

 

I was in a similar situation like hers with my old old ex who broke up with me, and It took me a few months to get over her and we still talk today as good friends time to time. But I guess everyone is different and need more or less time for these type's of things.

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sweetheart5381
Nope no games. I contacted her because I did not want to make her feel like I had no feelings for what we had, I wanted to let her know even though I did not have the same feelings that I would always be there if shen needed support. I know I broke her heart, but at the time I had no other choice, If I had still been with her It would have hurt her much more seeing that I was unhappy but still with her, and that would make her feel worse. I came on here to ask if It was okay to talk to her as a friend, and I found out the answer was a no.

 

I was in a similar situation like hers with my old old ex who broke up with me, and It took me a few months to get over her and we still talk today as good friends time to time. But I guess everyone is different and need more or less time for these type's of things.

 

Aww that nice, you gave her charity... good move. Most people don't like charity, fyi.

 

You dumped her, get over it... funny, you keep making yourself out to be a martyr (you HAD to do what you did for her sake) and yet you still want to know how she feels. Very sweet of you.

 

Leave her alone. If she wants your friendship, she will seek it out.

 

You told her to go away... now you go away. That's the deal when you break-up with someone that loves you but you dont love them back.

 

Common sense.

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Lowdragmaro11
Aww that nice, you gave her charity... good move. Most people don't like charity, fyi.

 

You dumped her, get over it... funny, you keep making yourself out to be a martyr (you HAD to do what you did for her sake) and yet you still want to know how she feels. Very sweet of you.

 

Leave her alone. If she wants your friendship, she will seek it out.

 

You told her to go away... now you go away. That's the deal when you break-up with someone that loves you but you dont love them back.

 

Common sense.

 

 

Okay Im going to guess you've been in her situation and are taking it out on me or something? I told you I have been in her situation. And when my old ex contacted me to be friends and that she would be there for me. I was annoyed at first but happy to know that I was still cared for and accepted her request, and that's why I thought maybe my ex might appriciate the same. But obviously it was a mistake since not everyone takes things the same way. And if you read my last reply's I mentioned I have not contacted her for a month and am leaving it that way since I found out I am doing more damage trying to make her feel better. I came on her to ask if it was okay to try again, and the answer was no.

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sweetheart5381
Okay Im going to guess you've been in her situation and are taking it out on me or something? I told you I have been in her situation. And when my old ex contacted me to be friends and that she would be there for me. I was annoyed at first but happy to know that I was still cared for and accepted her request, and that's why I thought maybe my ex might appriciate the same. But obviously it was a mistake since not everyone takes things the same way. And if you read my last reply's I mentioned I have not contacted her for a month and am leaving it that way since I found out I am doing more damage trying to make her feel better. I came on her to ask if it was okay to try again, and the answer was no.

 

Yes, you broke her heart. Not to be mended with "friendship" via facebook I suspect, lol... it may appease your guilt, but she suffered and you criticizing her and analyzing her will not appease anything but your own feelings of guilt. That's pretty damn selfish.

 

Like I said, suck it up Buttercup, she felf the pain, now you feel yours, but dont ever act like a martyr, that you HAD to do it. You chose to do it and I have a good feeling that you regret it but want to alleviate the guilt and justify your actions through criticism.

 

"She's Gone" is a great tune. Look it up :)

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BewitchedandBothered
This is going to sound random but I REALLY have to get this off my mind.

 

This thread is a testament to the sort of double standards women do to justify their attitude to dating.

 

While I agree the OP has been a dick about the breakup, I have this question. Would all of you be saying the same things if the OP was female? Don't bother with a reply, We all know the answer to THAT question :rolleyes:

 

It really get up my nose that women, whether they're the dumper or dumpee, can have their actions rationalised in every way. Men, on the other hand, will get demonised.

 

What you have said is a double standard.

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