BMZMJ Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 for those who hadnt read her message, she texted this: 'Just reminding you that my personal space is important to me right now. dont contact me because that will just confuse me more. If our lives are meant to be...then I will wait for my sign...God will be my guidance..and I believe he wants me to be happy no matter my decission...Respond yes if you understand...Whatever I decide, it will be for the best, I just know it...Thank you for your patience and understanding...I dont know how long it will take but time should not matter if love is life long..Take care XXXX...' yesterday I asked if I should respond and the general consensus was that I shouldn't. After reading those opinions, and after thinking about it myself I decided NOT TO text back and 24 hours I feel much better for making that choice. At the moment I am fine and planning ahead with work, university, gym and going to a cottage trip this weekend with friends and planning a trip to my native Colombia this April. Now I have another question. Does this woman sound like she has any intention of contacting me again, or is it all false hope? Link to post Share on other sites
rootless Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 .Now I have another question. Does this woman sound like she has any intention of contacting me again, or is it all false hope? Either way, I think you're reaction should be the same: Put her on the backburner as much as you're able, and focus purely on yourself, and things that make you a happier, more enriched, more fulfilled person. Her decision about whether or not to come back is entirely her own. She's gotta do that all by herself. And at this point, what she says isn't important. It's what she DOES. Her *actions*, not her words, will be the truest indicators of how she feels. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 At the moment I am fine and planning ahead with work, university, gym and going to a cottage trip this weekend with friends and planning a trip to my native Colombia this April. LOVE IT!!! You're doing all the right things to help yourself heal and doing things for self improvement! You're going to be better off in the end! As far as her contacting you in the future? Well, hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. Sometimes they do contact you. But, there are posters here that have had that happen. However, they were so far along in their healing process that they've moved on and weren't interested in revisiting the relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 yesterday I asked if I should respond and the general consensus was that I shouldn't. After reading those opinions, and after thinking about it myself I decided NOT TO text back and 24 hours I feel much better for making that choice. good for you - glad it worked so positively for you.... (. . .) Now I have another question. Does this woman sound like she has any intention of contacting me again, or is it all false hope? oh i think she will have every intention of contacting you - and like i said in your other thread - be wary of what she says in her message.... if it's anything other than a complete 180, and is just something purporting to 'touch base' and see how you are - this will be the chain-yanking i mentioned..... the only reason you could possibly consider contacting her, is if she gives you a completely clear and unequivocal indication that she totally regrets breaking up with you. so yeah - wait for it.... but don't hold your breath.... keep on keeping on! :thumbsup: Link to post Share on other sites
Author BMZMJ Posted March 14, 2012 Author Share Posted March 14, 2012 Thanks Honestly, I am expecting her to contact me at some point but not exactly sure when...what I dont know is what she would say... She has sort of mentioned that this break up is still very raw for her and it's almost like she hasnt realized it yet... During our arguments during our relationship she couldnt go more than 3 or 4 days without texting me or calling me crying even though I was always the cause of the argument. One time she would call me crying "why havent you called me?" and another I started getting messages like "I miss you...Im so hurt but I miss you..." Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 To save yourself pain, anxiety and all the kinds of questions, which all begin with "why is she.....?" Block her number now, or if you can't so that, label her number - 'do not pick up or respond!'. That way, the moment you see that on your 'phone - you know what NOT to do.... seriously, if you can block her number, and her email - do it. it will save you sooo much heartache in the long run.... Have you read the link in my sig....? Link to post Share on other sites
Ajax Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 Whether or not she intends to contact you is anyone's guess. After all, intentions can change. I had an ex a few years ago who would come around every couple months, check in and see if I was still interested. We'd talk for a couple weeks and then she'd go silent again for a couple months. The cycle went on for about a year until I just stopped responding to her. The ex who brought me to LoveShack a year and a half ago said that she still wanted me in her life and that she'd contact me when she was ready. It never happened. There's been no contact on either of our parts that entire time. You just can't predict it. And like I said, intentions can change. I'm sure at one point her intention was to be with you. Something changed on her end and her intention became to end the relationship. She may intend to contact you now, but after time passes and you both move on, she may decide to let sleeping dogs lie. Or she may really have no intention of getting back in touch with you now, only to realize months or years from now what she's lost. But as TaraMaiden has said, if she were to contact you, one would have to question her motives. Too many people check in just to see if they still have all their options open, to stroke their own ego, or relieve some guilt. You don't want to serve that purpose, and you don't owe her anything. But you do owe it to yourself to give yourself the time and space to heal properly, and become the best version of you that you can. Don't focus on someone else's intentions or when and if she ever contacts you again. Focus on your intentions, and your choices. Link to post Share on other sites
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