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Angry at myself


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8 months ago my gf of 4yrs broke up with me. I didn't follow the no contact rules. I just figured I was different. On top of that I repeatedly let my ex off the hook. She told me many times about how guilty she felt about hurting me. I'd tell her that it was ok. I wasn't mad. I understood that things just didn't work out. She'd tell me her problems. I'd comfort her. Tell her I'll always be there for her. It's like I would kick into bf mode and I'd just want her to be happy. Never mind that she broke my heart. i still put her ahead of what was good for me. A few weeks back I decided I'd go no contact. I told her I thought we should just stop talking for awhile. She told me that she felt like she was losing her best friend and that it really hurt her feelings. Again bf mode kicked in and I apologized. I APOLOGIZED! What an idiot.

 

Last night I saw her at an event I was at. Her and her new bf. I avoided looking at them because It just made me sick. Once though as I turned my head I caught a glimpse of her kissing him. I'm so mad at myself. maybe if I would have gone no contact a long time ago I would have been able to have handled last night better. Now that moment of them kissing keeps replaying in my head over and over.

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skydiveaddict

I feel for you dude. sorry you're going through this. from now on no contact

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8 months ago my gf of 4yrs broke up with me. I didn't follow the no contact rules. I just figured I was different. On top of that I repeatedly let my ex off the hook. She told me many times about how guilty she felt about hurting me. I'd tell her that it was ok. I wasn't mad. I understood that things just didn't work out. She'd tell me her problems. I'd comfort her. Tell her I'll always be there for her. It's like I would kick into bf mode and I'd just want her to be happy. Never mind that she broke my heart. i still put her ahead of what was good for me. A few weeks back I decided I'd go no contact. I told her I thought we should just stop talking for awhile. She told me that she felt like she was losing her best friend and that it really hurt her feelings. Again bf mode kicked in and I apologized. I APOLOGIZED! What an idiot.

 

Last night I saw her at an event I was at. Her and her new bf. I avoided looking at them because It just made me sick. Once though as I turned my head I caught a glimpse of her kissing him. I'm so mad at myself. maybe if I would have gone no contact a long time ago I would have been able to have handled last night better. Now that moment of them kissing keeps replaying in my head over and over.

 

seriously, what's with us nice guys and shedding blood and tears for one woman and then drowning in that same pool as the woman walks away with our pride?

 

RAWR.

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JacquesA.LeFrancais
I feel for you dude. sorry you're going through this. from now on no contact

 

 

QFE!!! She used you to get over the relationship as a crutch...

 

4 years....I'm sorry for you

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