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Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

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Old 28th July 2003, 11:02 AM   #1
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Hello everyone.... I an new here and want to thank you in advance for your advice.

I am 23 years old and my ex is 19. We started dating with I was 19 and she was 16. We had a great relationship for the most part. But I realized (a little too late) that I was forgetting about all the little things inside of it. I was forgetting to sit with her in bed at night and talk to her before we slept. I was forgetting that it is nice to just sit on the couch and hold each other. I just wanted the entertainment and the partying and to have fun. The ironic thing is that's what brought us together in the first place but in the end it had a major role in us breaking up. I have since realized this and have changed my ways dramatically. Another reason we broke up was because she wanted to grow and find herself on her own. Talk about a dagger through the heart.

Now it wasnt all bad. We had a lot of great times together. We truly had good chemistry and could play off each other naturally. Everyone had said this about us. I could feel her love, I knew what she was thinking and felt her energy everywhere we went. I'm not usually into all that "hokey" stuff.... but it was amazing. I'm afraid I'll never feel that again. She was my other half.

She came over last night to bring me a CD she made. We used to always make CDs for each other. We talked on the couch for a good hour and laughed like we hadn't in a long long time. What started out as a friendly chat turned sexual very fast. She asked if she could kiss me.... and that turned into sleeping with her for the first time in 2 months. Wow... I didn't expect this at all. And it was great.... so natural and it just felt right.

And then...

Afterwards, her mood changed dramatically. She wouldn't touch me or kiss me or look at me. She said we shouldn't of had sex and that she can't kiss her "best friend" anymore. SHE INITIATED EVERYTHING. Why would she want to sleep with me and then turn the cold shoulder? I don't get it. I thought she wanted to get back together (or at least consider it) but all she wanted in my eyes was some goodbye sex and some sympathy. Now I do want to be with her as she was the girl I thought I'd eventually marry... but I have a strong feeling that won't happen. It needs to happen though.... don't you ever get that feeling that something is right and it should be a certain way but it isn't working the way you want it to. Thats exactly how I feel right now. I want it so bad but she is pulling away.

WHen she left we agreed to keep in touch, although I'm not sure I want to at the point. She told me if it was meant to be then it will happen at some point between us.

What should I do here? I am utterly confused at this point.

Thank you all!

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Old 28th July 2003, 12:27 PM   #2
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Well... I can't blame her she got in to a relationship with you verry young and probably needs to explore herself as you said, she is now becoming an adult and a woman and you're probably the only man/ relationship she has ever had. You as well probably need to do some exploring on your own. And if it was ment to be it will be. Remain friends and do your own thing for awhile, as she's doing find out what you want in your life and work on goals for yourself it will make you both stronger independant people in the long run.
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