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It's completely done


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georgia girl

So, ex and I finally met today over lunch. It was kind-of sad but very good for my soul. He apologized again and explained that he had been feeling overwhelmed and acknowledged that the pressure for the commitment had come from inside of himself and not me. He also said that when he felt himself "switch off," he tried to fight it because he knew we had a good thing but he couldn't stop it. Then he said that once I rejected him, it cleared his head and he realized he was overreacting to things.

 

It was everything I knew, but it hurt to hear how long he had been "switched off," in his terms. It was even back when I thought we had a good relationship!

 

Anyway, I told him that it was over and not the, "let's let things heal, see where we are a few months again," kind of thing. I told him that yes, I still loved him but I can now see where love enough doesn't work. That I don't envision a scenerio where I could ever trust him again. (BTW, he didn't cheat or anything, he just quit on our relationship.) We said goodbye and hugged and agreed to not avoid each other any longer. I think that's healthy. It's over now and since I was the injured party and can handle seeing him, I don't see any point.

 

Funny thing, though. This woman that was chasing him - she's a paralegal in his office and his "friend" but I always knew she wanted him - called me afterwards. She told me how sorry she was that things didn't work out with us and that "I was the best thing that ever happened to him." Very weird, huh? I was polite, told her thanks and goodbye but thinking the whole time that she must be very disappointed. He never ran to her - and she was VERY WILLING - when we broke up. (My office does a lot of work for his firm, I would know about it.) What a nut job! I truly think that she's fishing for information. I bet she can't understand why he doesn't want her when he finally broke up with me! :laugh:

 

Anyway, going out to try my hand (again) at water skiing tonight. Then, dinner and drinks with friends. Hopefully, I'll meet someone. Where are you, you'reasian?

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