nick d Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 Hi everyone, I am new here. I came here looking for some advice.. A few days ago me and my girlfriend of 4 years broke up. (She is 19 I am 22) I recently found out that she was starting to go to parties and to the club behind my back. (She says she didn't cheat) Now she says she still loves me, but she needs time to live her life and have fun for a while. I have always told her that she needs time away from me to experience that stuff. But it really hurts that she chose to do it after 4 years I was her first everything.. Now I know I have already made a big mistake because the last few days I have come off as desperate. Spilling my feelings to her and practically begging for her back. I love her to death and I just don't want to lose her I haven't been able to sleep or eat and my heart hurts like crazy! She says she is still in love with me, but she needs time to have fun. But i'm afraid if I give her too much time, she'll find someone new And it seems this is ALOT easier on her then it is me! Can you guys please give me some advice on what I can do to get her back? I just hope I haven't already lost her Thank you for any help I really appreciate it! Link to post Share on other sites
Author nick d Posted April 2, 2009 Author Share Posted April 2, 2009 And it also doesn't help my matter that me and her best friend hate each other (Always have) and she is the one that influences my ex gf to go to the club and party etc.. Link to post Share on other sites
Peter_pan Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 seems like its a phase that most girls go through when they hit that age 19-21 they need to find themselfs etc, all you can realistically do is give her the space and act like your fine with it, keep her at a distance but not to far. then hopefully she will miss you and want to try again. this will only work of course if she realises that the grass isnt greener, if it is, then she may not return . sadly there are always guys who will want to go out with them.... Link to post Share on other sites
EmperorR Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 Go no contact and don't look back, your not a lightswitch that she can turn on and off as she wishes. Look if she loved you she would be with you, I find it funny when people we relationships and give you that crap, I still love you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nick d Posted April 2, 2009 Author Share Posted April 2, 2009 anymore advice? Link to post Share on other sites
Thomas X Forever Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 Emporer is the only one who's right in this topic. 100% no contact. What was that earlier guy talking about "keep her at a distance but not too far"? That = friend You need to keep her at the MAXIMUM distance. True 100% no contact. Let her crawl back in time. Here's how it will most likely play out. She will feel like she can breathe again now that she's single. Her friend who hates you will talk **** most likely and say things like "now doesnt this feel good to be single" and she'll agree. But the next time her friend asks her, she'll agree but itll be with a little less heart. Then things will begin to turn around. In about 4-6 months, your ex will come crawling back, either in tears, or trying to look strong. But in reality, she'll be missing you so badly it will kill her. But the only way to achieve the time line I just wrote is 100% no contact. If you keep looking pathetic, it'll screw it all up, and most likely push her away, and she'll remember you as the guy who couldn't let go/clingy. 100% no contact or expect to never be with her again. Link to post Share on other sites
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