Donza Posted November 29, 2007 Share Posted November 29, 2007 Basically i saw my ex at my best friends wedding, and she looked so sad and dissapointed. Basically i rang her yesterday to see how she was after i saw her at my best friends wedding. I cant believe the feelings are still there. And the pain is also still there. During our relationship, neither of us cheated. We just argued and then our stubborness got the better of us. We ended it and the breakup was very messy. Basically she told me she missed me, and i did sense a lot of regret on her part. We talked for a good 2.5 hours. At a few points i think she broke down over the phone. I nearly broke down also. I asked her whether she had met anyone, she said no. I told neither had i.. We joked, we laughed, we agreed and disagreed. But it was still there. The atttraction, the electricity. It was easy to talk to her... I asked her if she wanted to see me. She said yes, but it was very difficult at the moment. She has family visitors from abroad whom she has to entertain. But the weekend may be a good time to meet. Maybe for a drink or coffee she said.. She told me she thought i had finally grown a pair of balls and rang her. How should i play it from this point onwards? Link to post Share on other sites
kitkat289 Posted November 29, 2007 Share Posted November 29, 2007 that sounds great.Frankly speaking I dont know what you should do.Do what your heart says.If there wasn any issue like respect or something, things should go smooth.But just go slow and let her keep missing you to make things exciting again.all the best;) Link to post Share on other sites
kitkat289 Posted November 29, 2007 Share Posted November 29, 2007 that sounds great.Frankly speaking I dont know what you should do.Do what your heart says.If there wasnt any issue like respect or something, things should go smooth.But just go slow and let her keep missing you to make things exciting again.all the best;) Link to post Share on other sites
Ty Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 How should i play it from this point onwards? Slow. She wants to meet, good, but don't pressure her. And when you do meet, nothing too heavy the first time unless she initiates it. If you do, you'll push her away. Keep it light and flirty. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donza Posted November 30, 2007 Author Share Posted November 30, 2007 well we texted a bit yesterday. I told her i was going on my leaving party for work. As i have a new job.. Her reply was: "Sounds good, good luck with your new job" Thats a bit of a wierd reply dont you think? Sounds kind of final.. Her reply's were pretty short... Link to post Share on other sites
bustertypsy Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 Still seems to be mutual love and respect there.If you both have used the time apart to learn from your mistakes then a breakthrough could be possible.You said you both argued and your stubborness got the better.I can personally equate with that.That's exactly why my ex ended it with me.I know she still loves me a lot and I hope in time I get the opportunity you appear to be getting.Definately arguing and stubborness do not go well together.Let this be the first thing you know you must correct,before you reconcile.I hope it works out,for you both. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donza Posted November 30, 2007 Author Share Posted November 30, 2007 Still seems to be mutual love and respect there.If you both have used the time apart to learn from your mistakes then a breakthrough could be possible.You said you both argued and your stubborness got the better.I can personally equate with that.That's exactly why my ex ended it with me.I know she still loves me a lot and I hope in time I get the opportunity you appear to be getting.Definately arguing and stubborness do not go well together.Let this be the first thing you know you must correct,before you reconcile.I hope it works out,for you both. How should i proceed? Limited contact or NC? Link to post Share on other sites
kitkat289 Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 hey buster i like your replies so much...lol I wish things could be as good as we want them to be.Iam new at this site and all I see is negative comments which are soo disheartening but so yet so true.it feels great to read these negative comments and feels like I've grown up a bit in 2days. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donza Posted November 30, 2007 Author Share Posted November 30, 2007 Shouold i be the one who asks her agin if she wants to meet up or not? Link to post Share on other sites
kitkat289 Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 her replies are n ot worth your attention you know.She might be trying to act cool and get all the attention by distracting from the right path.Dont be a loser and instead of her replying short make her call you and talk 'something' and not just timepass.Analysing and again analysing and thinking if I should do or not...all this makes us sick everyday.Such people dont deserve us! Link to post Share on other sites
bustertypsy Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 Judging by the first post on the thread,it seems that you both miss each other.Are you not meeting her on Saturday? Just take things slowly.You spoke for 2.5 hours.Don't read too deeply into the text message reply.She is just answering you politely. Get together,enjoy each others company and let things develop just like they did when you first met.There's no point doing LC.If you love her,then go for it.If it doesn't happen,then go NC and move on. That's what I would do,good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
kitkat289 Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 NEVER ask her anything like that.Let her feel that though you are single,you have 'moved-on' and she would make 'some' efforts then. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donza Posted November 30, 2007 Author Share Posted November 30, 2007 Judging by the first post on the thread,it seems that you both miss each other.Are you not meeting her on Saturday? Just take things slowly.You spoke for 2.5 hours.Don't read too deeply into the text message reply.She is just answering you politely. Get together,enjoy each others company and let things develop just like they did when you first met.There's no point doing LC.If you love her,then go for it.If it doesn't happen,then go NC and move on. That's what I would do,good luck! Regarding the saturday thing. Nothing was finalised...which why we are stuck in limbo.. Should i ring her and confirm a date? or just leave it? Thing is, if i ring her and she does not answer etc or refuses to meet. Then i'm kinda back to square one maybe. She does love attention. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donza Posted November 30, 2007 Author Share Posted November 30, 2007 her replies are n ot worth your attention you know.She might be trying to act cool and get all the attention by distracting from the right path.Dont be a loser and instead of her replying short make her call you and talk 'something' and not just timepass.Analysing and again analysing and thinking if I should do or not...all this makes us sick everyday.Such people dont deserve us! Yeah, i'll send her a text or something like: "Hi. If you still want to meet up at somepoint. Give me a ring when you are free or when its convenient as i know you are pretty busy" I'll send it tomorrow probably or on Sunday.. Or should i leave it? I could do SO much better...and she knows this. Yet she still plays games Link to post Share on other sites
kitkat289 Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 i seriuousy wont even do that if I were in your place because everytime I felt its so silly to not be in touch over such small thing and like always I ended up calling him to be in touch again,which he also wanted but never took the initiative.It was me most of the times who didnt mind to be labelled as a 'loser' since I didnt have any ego issues and I thought it wasnt mature to behave like that.But, while I may be right, now I DO NOT want to break NC all by myself again since this has spoilt the chances of seeing ANY EFFORT from his side.Why the hell do we do things and believe its just in our nature to be this nice when the other person's going to be THE SAME---a creep,wanting us but doing NOTHING except enjoying the attention that we give! You should make her change for better and if there's any possibility of a good relationship, then you should help her see you in a new light, as a person who has great self-respect and is busy with his life and content (who doesnt give a damn if she messaged back and is neither too interested knowing about her personal life) .Let her crave and DO something about it.Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
lovesparis Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 i think communicating with her via text at this point is a bad idea, it's too "distant", i think if you want to confirm wknd plans to call her. if she's texting you back short and sweet, you know she has company in, maybe she's just busy? i also believe that if you really love her, your feelings are still there, youw ant to work back to being together, then you need to try. if she doesn't, then she won't. and don't play games. always be open and honest with your feelings. she probably still loves you but is weary about getting her hopes up too high. what i've realized since my breakup, is to get what you want, you have to put yourself out there, and if you get hurt in the process, it's part of the process. and it's ****ty. but if you don't spell out what you want, the other person has to guess, and that puts them on defense. hopefully the other person will put themselves out there too, but it might take awhile. good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
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