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Attracting men by taking and being resistant. thoughts?


In Search Of... Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.

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Old 24th October 2017, 8:10 PM   #31
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as a matter of fact...the good men don't even know your playin' it.

All they know is....what they see...then they're gone....(giving you what they see you as wanting)

funny thing about deception.....it never gets us what we really want
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Last edited by whatnot; 24th October 2017 at 8:31 PM..
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Old 25th October 2017, 2:02 AM   #32
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cookiesandough View Post
Thanks. Very interesting perspectives. Seems like many would agree it's a good idea to say you don't want to go on a specific date if you don't feel like it even if you like the person.
I find it interesting that you have gleaned the above from the replies you'd received.
This is what you do a lot of the time, turn down dates because you didn't feel like it. There have been various contexts when this has happened but to be honest each one came across as just uninterested and apathetic about the up-coming date.

Back to the article:
There is a MASSIVE difference between behaving naturally as in the article and behaving like that deliberately to attempt to attract.

If a person's life is busy and full then they are going to reply late to a text (for example) and aren't always going to be free. This will be apparent

Anxiety and insecurity ate pretty sniff out-able and easy to sense - especially so when that person has been free or even overly free and then switches to responding slowly (again, I'm talking texting here as it's a simple example) with no reason given (eg - I'm in meetings all day today, I'm out with friends/family today/tonight so won't be in touch).

If you are insecure/anxious and 'decide' to try this switch in behaviour it's going to be obvious it's game playing.

If a person is hanging onto their phone waiting for a text to come through and then choosing not to reply for 3 hours to 'appear' aloof in order to attract it will do the opposite.

I notice something that many people seem to ignore because it requires effort (and it's there in a ALL of these dating self help type books) is to make sure your life has stuff going on in it, have hobbies, have passions, the type of things that change how you life your life so a not to be tied to/addicted to your phone.
If that isn't how a person is naturally then it takes time to build and effort as it's a change of lifestyle.
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Old 25th October 2017, 11:07 AM   #33
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This is how women end up lonely

I hate when women do this crap. It is actually the #1 reason I will abandon the situation.. because of this type of female behavior. Pretending you like some other guy because you feel intimidated by the guy you actually want? Pretending to be not interested to get attention? I am so out of there. Its all emotional manipulation and just gets in the way of getting to know the woman. An emotionaly intelligent man can sense this orientation within a woman's aura within seconds. She probabbly does not even have to say anything.

Good looking, intelligent guys who have their lives together will not tolerate this for a moment. There are nethandrathal type of men who much enjoy chasing women aimlessly though.

The top percentage of desireable men DO NOT CHASE. The only observe who is entering their lives and react. They don't have to chase, and they are used to a life like that. Its just the way it is.
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Old 25th October 2017, 12:46 PM   #34
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as a matter of fact...the good men don't even know your playin' it.
All they know is....what they see...then they're gone....(giving you what they see you as wanting)
funny thing about deception.....it never gets us what we really want
This is female privileged talking. Post a picture of yourself on the internet and wait for thousands of compliments and emails to roll in... then just sort through them.

Yes, acting a certain way does work. It does make most men more interested in you.

Why do most women never put out the effort to learn these things, because they don't have to. The women that DO learn game will be more successful, because they are learning psychology.

Quote:
Originally Posted by GemmaUK View Post
I notice something that many people seem to ignore because it requires effort (and it's there in a ALL of these dating self help type books) is to make sure your life has stuff going on in it, have hobbies, have passions, the type of things that change how you life your life so a not to be tied to/addicted to your phone.
If that isn't how a person is naturally then it takes time to build and effort as it's a change of lifestyle.
I work in sales. I know how to use psychology to get people to buy my products. The same is true for people who work in Marketing.

Using Psychology to get a man to buy YOU isn't silly. It's smart. You have all the information in the world available, so don't be lazy. Stop living as an instinctual animal and start using your rational mind.

Win at dating by learning. Stop losing.
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Old 25th October 2017, 1:39 PM   #35
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Just be yourself and be real.
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Old 26th October 2017, 1:47 AM   #36
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This is female privileged talking. Post a picture of yourself on the internet and wait for thousands of compliments and emails to roll in... then just sort through them.

Yes, acting a certain way does work. It does make most men more interested in you.

Why do most women never put out the effort to learn these things, because they don't have to. The women that DO learn game will be more successful, because they are learning psychology.



I work in sales. I know how to use psychology to get people to buy my products. The same is true for people who work in Marketing.

Using Psychology to get a man to buy YOU isn't silly. It's smart. You have all the information in the world available, so don't be lazy. Stop living as an instinctual animal and start using your rational mind.

Win at dating by learning. Stop losing.


So funny, I use to work in sales (commission) The first thing I learn was women were emotional buyers and men were logical buyers. When men sell them selves in the dating market they try to sell them selves with logic and women try to sell them selves with emotion. Women should try to tap in a mans logic and a man should try to tap into a woman emotions.
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Old 26th October 2017, 2:17 AM   #37
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So funny, I use to work in sales (commission) The first thing I learn was women were emotional buyers and men were logical buyers. When men sell them selves in the dating market they try to sell them selves with logic and women try to sell them selves with emotion. Women should try to tap in a mans logic and a man should try to tap into a woman emotions.
Agreed, but it's another thing, same as filling out your life with hobbies etc that requires effort and thought.

Some folk do the above naturally, those who don't tend not to think about things like this nor wish to learn and it's not just sales people who know this stuff, many people do. For me it's always been obvious.

We live in an instant gratification society these days which goes alongside some folk not taking responsibility for actions (in life and in dating).
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Old 26th October 2017, 6:39 AM   #38
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In dating and relationships I am sweet, kind, thoughtful, proactive, giving and forgiving (to an extent). I am like that because that is who I am (really ) and who I want to be. I am also busy and independent. But being b1tchy, negative and selfish I would consider a personal failing. People will either return this behaviour in kind, or they will try to take advantage of it - which is exactly what you want, as it reveals who they are. Be clear on what your boundaries are and live by your own values and standards.

Because logically, surely the best way to find a long term compatible mate, is to know who you are first and authentically be that person.

Reducing this to sales and purchasing terminology, what you really do not want is post purchase dissonance - because in dating you are both a buyer and a seller.
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Old 26th October 2017, 8:10 AM   #39
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I think you should focus on what you want in a man rather than what they want in a woman.

And be yourself
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