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Searching for the one... at the local church


In Search Of... Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.

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Old 29th September 2017, 8:19 PM   #1
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Searching for the one... at the local church

Yeah, I made you laugh with that title, admit it

----------

Firstly, I want to make a few things clear:

1. I'm a conservative guy looking for a long-term, stable relationship with another conservative girl.

2. My family has a catholic background, though it's been a while since the last time I visited a church. I believe in God, but don't believe in religions.

Now that the important stuff is clear, I'll begin with this weird thread. After giving lots and lots of though to this issue, I arrived at the conclusion that I can't meet conservative girls in a traditional way, but I'm not willing to surrender and lower my standards.

I asked myself "Ethan, you obnoxious fool, how do you expect to meet girls who want the same as you and think in a similar fashion if you're always looking at the wrong places?". The answer was obvious: I've been doing things wrong all the time.

So, the first thing that came into my mind after that was making a list of places where I can have a chance to meet people like me (or, at least, who share the same background). And the best place so far is the local church.

Now, I'm not saying that I will become a devote religious man just for the sake of getting laid (if you think so, I can't blame you but it's not the case). You see, I'm getting tired of being surrounded by liberals, feminists, SJWs, leftists... They're just making it harder for me, I can't even be friends with people like that because they call you names everytime you disagree with them: 'Mysoginist!', 'nazi!', 'homophobe!', 'elitist!', and so on. I'm getting tired of being able to be myself without others being disgusted by it (which is okay, I don't expect people to agree with me all the time, but c'mon...)

Yes, I actually have a handful of conservative friends. But it's not enough, I need more. Sorry if I made this too political or something like that, it's not my intention to debate about politics in this thread.

So, what do you think? Am I too crazy? Does this make sense at all?
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Old 30th September 2017, 12:23 AM   #2
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Makes perfect sense, actually. On average, there are more religious women vs men. A lot of decent ladies at church who are looking for a guy. If I was a religious guy, I would have tried to meet women at church myself.

A lot of churches tend to play matchmaker with the single people there. If you show up to a decent church, you might find yourself being introduced to a few single ladies almost right away.
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Old 30th September 2017, 9:01 AM   #3
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Careful searching only at church. Catholic and Christian women of other denominations come in conservative and liberal, too, so realize that not all church-goers are going to share your views and values. The most likely Catholic women to share your views and values will be the more devout ladies, which could be a compatibility problem if you're a Christian who believes in God, but aren't particularly observant in your day to day life.

Other than church, you should also seek out a mate through online dating (there are websites that cater to the conservative and others that match based on questionnaires, so should have some conservative matches for you to consider) and through volunteer work and/or hobbies.

Frankly, as a Catholic myself, I don't see a lot of socializing between singles during or after Mass. Most people simply don't have time to socialize after Saturday or Sunday Mass as they have to prepare for the following work week, have family obligations, or are just plain tired and want some food and a nap. Most socializing occurs during parish events like the grounds clean up, the yearly picnic, or the every few weeks after Mass coffee and donut time.
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Old 30th September 2017, 9:30 AM   #4
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Not crazy at all. I'd suggest a large non-denominational contemporary church, as they usually have lots of activities you can get involved in, such as service/volunteer opportunities.....a great way to meet people, platonic or romantic. Good luck!
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Old 30th September 2017, 9:46 AM   #5
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I think it's a great idea! I'm not catholic anymore, but if I still was, God knows I'd be looking for my man at church 😊
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Old 30th September 2017, 10:05 AM   #6
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I don't think you will have much luck. Liberals & feminists believe in God too. Catholics don't socialize much after Mass, unlike certain Protestant sects which have potlucks & church socials where people can interact.

I think you will have more luck attracting somebody who shares your values at a political rally for the far right.
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Old 30th September 2017, 10:19 AM   #7
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Depends the specific church. Catholics are, on the whole, a lot less social. It's like union where you go, pay your dues, leave. But the parish my parents are part of there are lots of social events and socialization outside of mass. I was once hit on by a guy there but he wasn't my type and I don't date religious dudes.

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Old 30th September 2017, 11:11 AM   #8
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If people are calling you nazi and homophobe, you probably need a therapist worse than you need church. Not too many churches are going to support that type thing either. Churches are supposed to teach tolerance, you know.
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Old 30th September 2017, 11:30 AM   #9
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If people are calling you nazi and homophobe, you probably need a therapist worse than you need church. Not too many churches are going to support that type thing either. Churches are supposed to teach tolerance, you know.
... Excuse me, what?
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Old 30th September 2017, 12:22 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by EthanSPK View Post
Now, I'm not saying that I will become a devote religious man just for the sake of getting laid (if you think so, I can't blame you but it's not the case). You see, I'm getting tired of being surrounded by liberals, feminists, SJWs, leftists... They're just making it harder for me, I can't even be friends with people like that because they call you names everytime you disagree with them: 'Mysoginist!', 'nazi!', 'homophobe!', 'elitist!', and so on. I'm getting tired of being able to be myself without others being disgusted by it (which is okay, I don't expect people to agree with me all the time, but c'mon...)
What values do you have that equate to people calling you these names or 'calling you out' perhaps?
You are aware that church goers have values but also don't live in the dark ages, yes?
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Old 30th September 2017, 12:47 PM   #11
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What values do you have that equate to people calling you these names or 'calling you out' perhaps?
You are aware that church goers have values but also don't live in the dark ages, yes?
I just quoted those not because that's what I'm called (at least not commonly), but because they are usual tags that liberals use to describe people who disagree with their ideas.

But I'm not here to discuss about my political views. To be honest, if I knew I had to start clarifying them, I wouldn't even have bothered to open this thread in the first place. As I said, I'm not here to talk about politics and no, I'm not a nazi mysoginist homophobe elitist.


BTW thanks everyone for your answers, I think I'm done here.
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Old 30th September 2017, 3:54 PM   #12
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It's futile to search for the one. Life will eventually lead you a person who is right for you. There was a time I was driving 70 miles to go search in the city for the right girl. I never found her. I gave up and was working in a warehouse where there was mostly older people then one day an attraction girl started working there. At the time she was the right one for me. I never had to search for her.
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Old 1st October 2017, 10:07 AM   #13
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You see, I'm getting tired of being surrounded by liberals, feminists, SJWs, leftists... They're just making it harder for me, I can't even be friends with people like that because they call you names everytime you disagree with them: 'Mysoginist!', 'nazi!', 'homophobe!', 'elitist!', and so on. I'm getting tired of being able to be myself without others being disgusted by it (which is okay, I don't expect people to agree with me all the time, but c'mon...)
Lmao... That's exactly how I feel most of the time. I can't find any cool friends or a girlfriend because everyone is an SJW these days. You can't let your guard down and just have fun these days without having to watch your mouth and survey every last syllable that escapes your mouth, lest you be branded all the descriptors you outlined above.

The other thing that ****ING KILLS ME to no end is this dumbass hipster trend everyone is going through now. The hipster fashion and style has rubbed off on everything now. This metrosexual, skinny jean, tight shirt, faggy beard, wave haircut style accompanied by lame ass indie rock garbage. It's too much to handle. I hate my generation so much. It makes me not even want to make friends or try to get a gf when this is the norm.
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Old 1st October 2017, 10:12 AM   #14
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I think you will have more luck attracting somebody who shares your values at a political rally for the far right.
Which is a place I'd 100% rather be than a far-left rally.
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