RyanBeynolds Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Today has been hard. I am in Med School and I know I should be focusing on studies but last night I hardly got any sleep. My friend called me late night saying he saw my girl all over a friend at the bar. The friend kept pushing her off because he knew we were a thing but she kept pursuing. This was one of those long distance relationships that never seem to work. I fell pretty hard for this girl even though we met each other not too long ago. But she shared the same sentiments as I did. She did so much for me, traveling hours just to see me for one night, paying for events I was already at to see me even for a couple hours. Which makes me very puzzled as to how she can admit she loves me, and wishes she was with me... and then do this all in the same night. She seemed so obsessed with me and then this happens. It seems like I keep getting attached to the promiscuous women. Albeit, I have only truly liked two women in my whole life, this is the second one with the same outcome -- cheating. It's like I ignore the red flags. My first girlfriend had a lot of previous partners, and this one seemed the same way. But I just found them really attractive, liked their personality, enjoyed their company and talking to them... so I went for it. I don't even know what I am trying to get from this post. Probably just a rant but I guess I want clearance on why I keep picking the bad ones. I don't feel insecure, but even some female classmates the other day were basically saying I get girls way out of my league. Is it this that makes me stick with even the bad ones that show red flags? I just don't know. It's killing me that I haven't become attached to many women in my lifetime, just two. I also have had my share of flings but it's just because I don't end up liking her. I feel like I am getting old (23 years old) without a partner, but know it may be for the better so I can focus and finish Med School. Any comments/opinions/concerns... all are welcome. Thank you for your time Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 yes, it is for the better, 23 is too young to settle down, or be tied down yet 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 Well, promiscuous isn't the same as cheating. If you had a commitment with this girl, a spoken commitment that you wouldn't see others, then she was cheating. If not, she wasn't. Sorry it happened to you. But please know that it's not quite the same thing. A person can be promiscuous but then never cheat on someone they have a commitment with. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 Well, promiscuous isn't the same as cheating. If you had a commitment with this girl, a spoken commitment that you wouldn't see others, then she was cheating. If not, she wasn't. Sorry it happened to you. But please know that it's not quite the same thing. A person can be promiscuous but then never cheat on someone they have a commitment with. My thoughts exactly. They are not necessarily one in the same. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author RyanBeynolds Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 The first time it was my actual girlfriend. This time was complicated. The same night her incident occurred, only 6 hours earlier she was saying how she loved me and wishes we were together. I just don't get how someone can flip-flop like that in such a drastic way Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 This time was complicated. The same night her incident occurred, only 6 hours earlier she was saying how she loved me and wishes we were together. I just don't get how someone can flip-flop like that in such a drastic way Were the two of you in a relationship? Exclusive? Link to post Share on other sites
Author RyanBeynolds Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 Were the two of you in a relationship? Exclusive? We talked about it but never laid it down. She was mad at me before because there was a tagged photo of a friend kissing me on the cheek. Both of us would have definitely been disappointed if we did something, as you can see. If we were deep into the talking stage to the point where she was saying she loved me, why is it wrong of me to expect no funny business going on? My friends that witnessed it told me to drop her right away. I cut ties this morning Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 (edited) They are always the easiest to get along with. But not just with you. Also, always very nice, friendly and open. To a lot of guys. Edited January 20, 2017 by Imported 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author RyanBeynolds Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 They are always the easiest to get along with. But not just with you. Also, always very nice, friendly and open. To a lot of guys. Yep, you're right! But not sure if that makes me feel better... Ha Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 Sounds like you didn't have a commitment and that she thought you weren't acting like you had one either, about the kiss on the cheek. If you hadn't agreed to be exclusive, she didn't cheat. She did what she figured you were doing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterio Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 Break up with her and focus on your studies. At age 23 you don't need a GF. Let them more come to you, or Date women in your Medical School, but women that are in a different class or they are studying a different field. 23 Being in Med School. To be host with you. You don't really need the burden of having a long distant GF. Its either she is within an hour of you two being together or forget it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RyanBeynolds Posted January 21, 2017 Author Share Posted January 21, 2017 Break up with her and focus on your studies. At age 23 you don't need a GF. Let them more come to you, or Date women in your Medical School, but women that are in a different class or they are studying a different field. 23 Being in Med School. To be host with you. You don't really need the burden of having a long distant GF. Its either she is within an hour of you two being together or forget it. Thank you. This is what I needed. Because all of this "exclusive" talk... I can't agree with. Once again, we knew how serious we felt about each other, with mentions of dating, "I love you" being said. That just doesn't coincide with a girl being all over multiple guys in one night, even when she knew my friends were there. I can't be with someone like that or have others thinking we are a thing. I think why I'm posting is because it just sucks that I thought she was gonna be a good one and all of these red flags pop up in my face. I guess it's good I can spot them. Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetfish Posted January 22, 2017 Share Posted January 22, 2017 you've got mail:cool: Link to post Share on other sites
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