Raina314 Posted April 21, 2016 Share Posted April 21, 2016 In my freshman year of college I had the biggest crush on a really cute guy with whom I had a lot of mutual friends. It didn't really go anywhere and I eventually lost interest and started seeing my now ex, who is one of said mutual friends. Even though it didn't go anywhere, I always thought the feelings might have been reciprocated because we'd always be kinda nervous around each other and one night after we'd been hanging out with our friends he walked me back to my car with his arm around me. This was before I started seeing my ex, who, as some of you may know, dumped me about six months ago and totally broke my heart. Last night, the old crush randomly messaged me on fb (for the first time ever) to wish me a happy 4/20 and we talked for a few hours. Sadly, I ended up falling asleep and though I apologized this morning, he didn't respond . I feel really bad and embarrassed. I don't want him to think I find him boring. I'm not sure what this means or what to do. On one hand I can't say I'm not a little interested and no guy has ever randomly messaged me without a more than friends motive. On the other hand, I know from our friends that he's more than a little commitaphobic and I don't want to get involved with anyone who isn't interested in being serious and it makes me a bit uneasy that I have no idea how much he knows about the breakup between me and his friend or what he has or hasn't been told. I was thinking of maybe having a housewarming party for my new place and inviting him, but idk. I don't know if I'm ready and to boot I'm terrified of seeming needy or desperate so I don't want to do anything to make him think I'm trying to pursue something. But he's really friendly and nice and cute and successful...perfect on paper so I don't necessarily want to pass it up, either. Thoughts? Advice? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted April 22, 2016 Share Posted April 22, 2016 Have the party. Invite him. If he shows up great. If he doesn't & doesn't RSVP why he'd not coming, assume he's not interested & move on. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 23, 2016 Share Posted April 23, 2016 Agreed ^. And since you know he has commitment issues, don't assume he'll change for you. He has some interest, but you know what the odds are that it's serious. Still, that's why you date, to find out if there's any depth there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Raina314 Posted April 24, 2016 Author Share Posted April 24, 2016 Thanks =). I'm also still up and down about my ex, so I think having a party is about all I can manage. It'll be a long time before I'm ready to make any real moves again. Link to post Share on other sites
DreamBigg Posted April 24, 2016 Share Posted April 24, 2016 Guys don't reach out and message girls they don't normally talk to and then have hour long convos if they don't like you or want to explore something with you. Think about it... Have you ever messaged a guy and texted back and forth for hours just because he was you "pal"? Doubt it. He's flirting and 4/20 was his excuse to contact you. If you and him are into smoking, then a simple "hey, wanna come puff with me?" Text would do the trick. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Raina314 Posted April 24, 2016 Author Share Posted April 24, 2016 Guys don't reach out and message girls they don't normally talk to and then have hour long convos if they don't like you or want to explore something with you. Think about it... Have you ever messaged a guy and texted back and forth for hours just because he was you "pal"? Doubt it. He's flirting and 4/20 was his excuse to contact you. If you and him are into smoking, then a simple "hey, wanna come puff with me?" Text would do the trick. Haha, neither of us smoke, actually. He was just joking around and sent me this silly article to go along with it. But thanks, that's good to hear lol Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts