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Why Do "Good Guys" put their foot in their mouth? :'(


circlesinfinity

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circlesinfinity

I met what I thought was a good guy on Instagram. He always says things to 'play' with me and they hurt.

 

The last time he mentioned a photo of my mom and me. He was talking about her being pretty,

The LAST STRAW was him saying that we can edit me out and just zoom in on my mom.

 

Really!!!? My whole family has beautiful women but...this is SO DISRESPECTFUL.

 

FML *crying*

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I don't know. Because they're only obsessed with sex and their ego, even the good guys? What made you think this one was different anyway, and why do you even care?

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I assume he was joking? If you find his comments hurtful, ask him to stop. If he doesn't, stop talking to him.

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I have to come in and defend 'good guys'. If this guy was playing with you and your heart and offending you otherwise, then he wasn't a good guy. Period.

 

There are many respectful, decent men out there. Don't confuse an arsehole with a good guy and then go and then go an be disrespectful to good guys.

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FML *crying*

 

 

Standard English please for it means nothing to me. And a big FML right back at you, what ever that means.

 

 

You see there still are people that use the internet that were born during the last century.

Edited by road
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circlesinfinity
Standard English please for it means nothing to me. And a big FML right back at you, what ever that means.

 

 

You see there still are people that use the internet that were born during the last century.

 

I'm not checking my writing because I'm not writing an essay and I don't feel like. Sorry if you didn't understand anything.

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circlesinfinity
I assume he was joking? If you find his comments hurtful, ask him to stop. If he doesn't, stop talking to him.

I already told him a while ago, thanks for you reply.

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circlesinfinity
I have to come in and defend 'good guys'. If this guy was playing with you and your heart and offending you otherwise, then he wasn't a good guy. Period.

 

There are many respectful, decent men out there. Don't confuse an arsehole with a good guy and then go and then go an be disrespectful to good guys.

You're right, thanks for your reply. I'm just upset...

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Good guys don’t make hurtful “jokes.” Hurtful jokes are not funny, not jokes. Try not to cry. His hurtful words are about who he is, not about you. It takes a while to discover what someone is really like and this is not a kind person no matter what image of himself he tries to promote.

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That ain't no "good guy".

 

There are plenty of legit good guys out there who like to joke and tease. However, they do it in a way that doesn't cross the line and is fun for everyone involved. And they also know when to be serious and when not to be.

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On the internet we're all ostensibly 'good' people, or we like to present ourselves that way if/when we want something. In real life, it varies. People are mixed bags of good, bad and indifferent. Imperfect.

 

Since it sounds like you had a substantial online-only interaction with this person and who he is in real life is largely unknown so my suggestion, as an old time internet dater, is to, if a future iteration doesn't ask to meet you after one or two interactions online, move on. That saves time and can prevent such unfortunate events as this from occurring.

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I met what I thought was a good guy on Instagram. He always says things to 'play' with me and they hurt.

 

The last time he mentioned a photo of my mom and me. He was talking about her being pretty,

The LAST STRAW was him saying that we can edit me out and just zoom in on my mom.

 

Really!!!? My whole family has beautiful women but...this is SO DISRESPECTFUL.

 

FML *crying*

 

Its a standard PUA technique called "negging"

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GorillaTheater
Its a standard PUA technique called "negging"

 

 

It's either this, or the guy (who I assume the OP has never met) just enjoys f*cking with her. Like sport.

 

 

I understand the temptation and have the bucket of infractions to prove it.

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Wait, people meet on Instagram now? How does that even work?

 

I feel like that annoying older person who doesn't understand "kids these days", but I seriously just don't understand this generation. Why don't you try meeting each other in person? You're young and everyone your age is single, and you're in school, around potential mates all of the time. Meeting people online is horrible but when you're older you just have limited options.

 

But anyway, how well do you know intstagram guy? Did you guys meet in person or talk on the phone? If not, why are you so invested in some stranger who likes your pictures?

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circlesinfinity
Wait, people meet on Instagram now? How does that even work?

 

I feel like that annoying older person who doesn't understand "kids these days", but I seriously just don't understand this generation. Why don't you try meeting each other in person? You're young and everyone your age is single, and you're in school, around potential mates all of the time. Meeting people online is horrible but when you're older you just have limited options.

 

But anyway, how well do you know intstagram guy? Did you guys meet in person or talk on the phone? If not, why are you so invested in some stranger who likes your pictures?

Hi AMJ

Are you able to receive person messages?

I was going to send some answers to your questions.

 

You're not annoying at all, I'm 28 and stuff that people my age range/younger do I don't understand. I'm definitely an old soul but because I do like to interact with people my age, I try to adjus. I am starting to think that is an awful idea.

 

When I joined Instagram I only joined to post inspirational pictures that are used for my Textiles and artwork. I told him that I didn't intent to meet and connect with someone and also I don't date.

 

He lives in another state, I think it takes a day to get to were I am by car (24-48hrs). He said he wanted to meet in June since that is around his birthday.

 

We have many things in common so we cliqued instantly...

 

He never liked many of my photos. I only posted one or two pictures of myself. We have talked on the phone, pretty much everynight (unless I didn't want to talk). I would like to answer the rest of your questions personally because I know it will derail the thread. :/

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I met what I thought was a good guy on Instagram. He always says things to 'play' with me and they hurt.

 

The last time he mentioned a photo of my mom and me. He was talking about her being pretty,

The LAST STRAW was him saying that we can edit me out and just zoom in on my mom.

 

Really!!!? My whole family has beautiful women but...this is SO DISRESPECTFUL.

 

FML *crying*

 

 

Why are you calling this a "good guy"?

 

He sounds mean and I doubt that it was an accidental comment.

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circlesinfinity
Its a standard PUA technique called "negging"

I just looked this up, you could be right. This has happened to me a lot since I've been dating. I hate this so much.

 

He said he just teases but I said that I don't like certain " jokes" he says. I understand making a girl your interested in laugh but this made me uncomfortable. I felt like total crap.

 

I am not trying to offend the guys on here. I know women can be just as crazy in the world of dating.

 

I just hate people treating good people wrong. I'm scared to death of dating. It took several years to build my confidence.

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circlesinfinity
Why are you calling this a "good guy"?

 

He sounds mean and I doubt that it was an accidental comment.

 

I guess the mind games made me think he was. Thanks for replying. I've lost contact :(

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I met what I thought was a good guy on Instagram. He always says things to 'play' with me and they hurt.

 

The last time he mentioned a photo of my mom and me. He was talking about her being pretty,

The LAST STRAW was him saying that we can edit me out and just zoom in on my mom.

 

Really!!!? My whole family has beautiful women but...this is SO DISRESPECTFUL.

 

FML *crying*

 

Not sure what suggests he's a good guy.

 

He sounds pretty douchey to me. Maybe it's safer to not jump to assuming a guy is "good" until he proves it. And therefore you won't invest too many emotions and give them the power to hurt you.

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That was no good guy. That was a pervy little jerk who didn't care if he embarrassed or hurt you. Block him every single way possible and just say to yourself how lucky you are you found out before you really got involved with him.

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This guy sounds fishy at the least. You don't want fishy.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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