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"If you do this, I won't answer"


LookAtThisPOst

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LookAtThisPOst

Ever read those online dating profiles where women say, "If you contact me with, 'hey babe' or 'you're hot!' or asking me for nude pictures, I won't answer."

 

Yet, when you send them a respectful email with none of the above, they still don't answer. :laugh:

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Like fishing, you should tailor your bait to your prey. Some will respond to garbage (Crabs- and other bottom feeders), but most require something palatable, something of substance. And even then, you must tailor your statements/messages according to something they're interested in eating.

 

I have no idea why i turned it into a fishing metaphor. POF maybe?

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Ever read those online dating profiles where women say, "If you contact me with, 'hey babe' or 'you're hot!' or asking me for nude pictures, I won't answer."

 

Yet, when you send them a respectful email with none of the above, they still don't answer. :laugh:

 

I think the former is stating what they definitely WON'T answer to, but it's silly to think that they MUST answer to messages not like that.

 

I definitely don't respond to messages like "Hey babe" and "You're hot", those are tossed immediately. But I also reserve the right to not answer other messages as well if I am not feeling it for whatever reason. It's like applying for a job for example, if at MINIMUM you need a BA, then applicants without one get tossed immediately, but it does not mean ANYONE with a BA will automatically get the job or be moved along in the process. That's just the minimum requirement and after you reserve the right to screen for other things you're looking for.

Edited by MissBee
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Rejected Rosebud

What's funny or odd about that? NO WAY will they respond to anybody who says that stuff. Guys who say different stuff - they will respond if they feel interested!! I don't get why you have an issue with that???:confused:

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LookAtThisPOst
Pics are what determine responses, not messages.

 

Yeah, that's pretty much it, women tend to thumb through the profile pics like a catalog..."bald...short....bald....short.....*skip them all in a second*...oooooh...hey there tall, dark and handsome!"

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I'd be tempted to send an email "Hey.. nice tits" :laugh:

 

I found that stuff annoying but I also don't have to deal with the men who sent dick pics and "wasup" emails, that was always just looked right past by me as a trivial line that didn't mean anything, see past it and send her a better email.. a challenge worth accepting.. better than shooting fish in a barrel IMO

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Rejected Rosebud
Yeah, that's pretty much it, women tend to thumb through the profile pics like a catalog..."bald...short....bald....short.....*skip them all in a second*...oooooh...hey there tall, dark and handsome!"
Why do you think a woman who doesn't answer ads that say "hey" or whatever are just superficial, and also, OLD does favor good looking people, naturally since it's full of pictures and you don't get to lead with your outstanding personality!!!
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Yeah, that's pretty much it, women tend to thumb through the profile pics like a catalog..."bald...short....bald....short.....*skip them all in a second*...oooooh...hey there tall, dark and handsome!"

 

Do you sit down and observe women while they're online dating and have empirical evidence that this occurs or is this just your guess? :confused:

 

I know the point of the thread isn't to hear from actual women and how some of us real life women go about OLD but I fell into the trap of thinking it might have been.

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salparadise
I'd be tempted to send an email "Hey.. nice tits" :laugh:

 

 

I've been known to send messages meeting or exceeding the do-not-send warning criteria. :rolleyes: I am basically not interested in any woman who is compelled to spew negativity at anonymous strangers on her dating profile. An awful lot of them do it though. I've wondered why...

 

First, of course, is that she probably has received offensive messages, takes it quite personally, and generalizes her vitriol toward the entire gender.

 

Secondly, she is somewhat embarrassed to be hanging out her shingle, so to speak, since we all know that an attractive, demure debutante has suitors lined up around the block and therefore no need to advertise her availability on the interwebs.

 

Third, there seems to be a sense of entitlement/superiority, similar to the way women sometimes expect men with certain deficits (short, bald, not alpha enough) to sense that she's way out of their league and appreciate from afar... and consider any lack of acceptance of this paradigm to be a contempt-worthy affront.

 

Fourth, her delusion is one of castles and kings, princes with glass slippers, knights-in-shining-armor, and any character not officially scripted into her dream is decidedly unwelcome and needs to be cast out of the kingdom lest he slips a pea under her mattress and ruins the whole damn thing.

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Yeah, that's pretty much it, women tend to thumb through the profile pics like a catalog..."bald...short....bald....short.....*skip them all in a second*...oooooh...hey there tall, dark and handsome!"

 

I don't do this. I wouldn't reject a man simply for being bald or short (and actually I'm more attracted to shorter men). I would, however, reject in a second if I got any impression he was the kind of man who said things like this.

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bentleychic
Pics are what determine responses, not messages.

Nah. If a totally hot guy messages and asks me to send him a nudie, I won't respond. I wouldn't respond regardless of what they look like.

 

I've responded to people that I wasn't attracted to and didn't fit in to my criteria in the past. Generally as long as someone is making a genuine effort, I'll respond b/c I believe that you can never have too many friends. May not turn out to be a romantic match, but friends? Sure, why not?

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bentleychic
I've been known to send messages meeting or exceeding the do-not-send warning criteria. :rolleyes: I am basically not interested in any woman who is compelled to spew negativity at anonymous strangers on her dating profile. An awful lot of them do it though. I've wondered why...

 

First, of course, is that she probably has received offensive messages, takes it quite personally, and generalizes her vitriol toward the entire gender.

 

Secondly, she is somewhat embarrassed to be hanging out her shingle, so to speak, since we all know that an attractive, demure debutante has suitors lined up around the block and therefore no need to advertise her availability on the interwebs.

 

Third, there seems to be a sense of entitlement/superiority, similar to the way women sometimes expect men with certain deficits (short, bald, not alpha enough) to sense that she's way out of their league and appreciate from afar... and consider any lack of acceptance of this paradigm to be a contempt-worthy affront.

 

Fourth, her delusion is one of castles and kings, princes with glass slippers, knights-in-shining-armor, and any character not officially scripted into her dream is decidedly unwelcome and needs to be cast out of the kingdom lest he slips a pea under her mattress and ruins the whole damn thing.

Really? So if a woman says please don't send me d*ck pics and please don't contact me if you're married/not single, you'd contact her doing that or if you were in that situation? What a waste of both of your time.

 

I think some people post things specifically because they don't want to waste everyone's time. It's better to be up front about what you want.

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imtooconfused

As to the question of why would someone put that in their profile, it's quite simple really... To let you know that they have a very negative view of not only dating, but of life in general. It helps you avoid the situation of explaining that is the reason you are not interested in a second date. When I see something like that, I know immediately our personalities won't mesh.

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LookAtThisPOst

Dang, Sal Paradise, I like the way you put together these sentences so engagingly and intelligently. Ever thought about writing a book? :)

 

I've been known to send messages meeting or exceeding the do-not-send warning criteria. :rolleyes: I am basically not interested in any woman who is compelled to spew negativity at anonymous strangers on her dating profile. An awful lot of them do it though. I've wondered why...

 

First, of course, is that she probably has received offensive messages, takes it quite personally, and generalizes her vitriol toward the entire gender.

 

Secondly, she is somewhat embarrassed to be hanging out her shingle, so to speak, since we all know that an attractive, demure debutante has suitors lined up around the block and therefore no need to advertise her availability on the interwebs.

 

Third, there seems to be a sense of entitlement/superiority, similar to the way women sometimes expect men with certain deficits (short, bald, not alpha enough) to sense that she's way out of their league and appreciate from afar... and consider any lack of acceptance of this paradigm to be a contempt-worthy affront.

 

Fourth, her delusion is one of castles and kings, princes with glass slippers, knights-in-shining-armor, and any character not officially scripted into her dream is decidedly unwelcome and needs to be cast out of the kingdom lest he slips a pea under her mattress and ruins the whole damn thing.

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LookAtThisPOst

I've even seen, "If you have a jail record, please don't contact me" as if that would actually stop someone with a jail record.

 

Oh, "Also, must have some kind of transportation". I have to laugh at those.

 

I've yet to see, "Must be able to hold in their pee and poop until they are able to make it to the bathroom."...but I've yet to see that, so apparently they are at LEAST meeting civilized men who don't soil themselves, you know? Got to give men with jail records to at least be civilized enough to "hold it in." LOL

 

 

 

As to the question of why would someone put that in their profile, it's quite simple really... To let you know that they have a very negative view of not only dating, but of life in general. It helps you avoid the situation of explaining that is the reason you are not interested in a second date. When I see something like that, I know immediately our personalities won't mesh.
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salparadise
Really? So if a woman says please don't send me d*ck pics and please don't contact me if you're married/not single, you'd contact her doing that or if you were in that situation? What a waste of both of your time.

 

That's not what I said- please don't put words in my mouth.

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Ever read those online dating profiles where women say, "If you contact me with, 'hey babe' or 'you're hot!' or asking me for nude pictures, I won't answer."

 

Yet, when you send them a respectful email with none of the above, they still don't answer. :laugh:

 

EVERY message I have received has been:

 

"hi"

 

"hiya"

 

"hi hun"

 

"hi how r u"

 

"hi x"

 

and nothing more!

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Pics are what determine responses, not messages.

 

My boyfriend didn't have a picture.

His username was also harrypotter6969696969

Turns out he was kinda awesome.

I normally would not have responded, but... I did. Any we hit it off.

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