iDrumKing Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 Long story short there was this chick in my college course that I've been wanting to get to know. During a short break I saw her sitting by herself. To break the ice I asked her if I could copy some of her notes that I obviously had. She said yes. I simply asked what she was majoring in, what she thought of the class, yah know the safe questions. Hardly answered the questions, she seemed very "stand offish". She started to gather up her things, I took it as a que that she didn't want to talk. I thanked her, then excused myself. Sure it sucks. There was a slight sting at first but after 10 minutes I was good! I wasn't dead, so I don't know why I've chickened out on so many approaches in the past. For those who are in question of approaching some you like... just do it. Be respectful and be yourself. If that's not enough, then it's okay. 10 Link to post Share on other sites
kolleamm Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 I love how we subtly test women these days to see if they truly like us with these small body language cues. You can have your answer in seconds. Anyways cudos for trying. NEXT! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
endlessabyss Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 Good for you, brah. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 (edited) Long story short there was this chick in my college course that I've been wanting to get to know. During a short break I saw her sitting by herself. To break the ice I asked her if I could copy some of her notes that I obviously had. She said yes. I simply asked what she was majoring in, what she thought of the class, yah know the safe questions. Hardly answered the questions, she seemed very "stand offish". She started to gather up her things, I took it as a que that she didn't want to talk. I thanked her, then excused myself. Sure it sucks. There was a slight sting at first but after 10 minutes I was good! I wasn't dead, so I don't know why I've chickened out on so many approaches in the past. For those who are in question of approaching some you like... just do it. Be respectful and be yourself. If that's not enough, then it's okay. Good for you man. Lessons that a lot of men learn way too late. Hit and run. Keep truckin' Edited November 3, 2014 by JuneJulySeptember 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 Yes, and the thing is once a woman sees you handle both the approach and the rejection like a man, either her or her friends' estimation of you may go up a notch. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 Don't ever be afraid of rejection and what you describe wasn't bad at all. It makes us stronger, not to mention the unknown and always wondering "what if" is waaaaay worse than trying and gaining experience along the way. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterio Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 I guess a lot of women have a lot of men asking them out, thinking all we want is sex and if they let us. WE might get them pregnant and leave. I can say this for all men. If we are asking you out on a date. Its to explore the possibility of being in a relationship. If we men just want sex. We set up hooker and one night stands at the bar. What I don't like is that we are all way to based on the physical. What else could it be but that. Link to post Share on other sites
Do_The_Herp Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 Yes, and the thing is once a woman sees you handle both the approach and the rejection like a man, either her or her friends' estimation of you may go up a notch. I doubt it. Besides, who the hell is going to see it or notice on a bustling crowded campus ground where everyone's busy doing their own thing? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Do_The_Herp Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 Don't ever be afraid of rejection and what you describe wasn't bad at all. It makes us stronger, not to mention the unknown and always wondering "what if" is waaaaay worse than trying and gaining experience along the way. What do you mean, "experience"? What does some bitch storming away from harmless empty small talk really do to improve one's self? I can't think of anything myself. Hey, OP, if you read this, I just tried casually suggesting a date with a near stranger after talking with them for a bit. It was spontaneous and I wasn't even feeling them like that, OP, but I just went with it as they were cute and seemed friendly. I don't regret it. Not really something I thought about until I read this thread, it just happened and I suppose that since they weren't available or interested, nothing came of it, and it was quickly forgotten. Maybe I just seemed insincere about it, too jokey or something, but they just got a bit tongue tied while trying to steer the conversation back to what we were talking about. Didn't take long for them to mention their boy friend. Maybe they had one, I really don't give a ****. They were non-confrontational enough about it. That's the general mentality that I think a man must cultivate. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author iDrumKing Posted November 3, 2014 Author Share Posted November 3, 2014 Maybe they had one, I really don't give a ****. They were non-confrontational enough about it. That's the general mentality that I think a man must cultivate. I see what you're saying. I was just walking by and I saw her and knew that was a prime opportunity to do something. If not... I would be re-browsing these forums up until midnight, get my confidence up, just to bail out again. I just went for it. Like I said, it sucks that she wasn't "into" the conversation, but hey whatever. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CadeYeager Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Just a thought... but what if she was the one that was super nervous? Maybe because of that, she was very short in her replies to your questions. I know several people in general when in nervous situations, they flake out quick not because it's you, but because they don't know how to handle the situation. Probably isn't the case, but I like to look at it from different angles. Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 What do you mean, "experience"? What does some bitch storming away from harmless empty small talk really do to improve one's self? I can't think of anything myself. Um experience approaching and speaking to women.....duh? And I don't know how all of a sudden the girl OP spoke to is a "bitch that stormed away"... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 good for you. more men should just get it done. you have your 'does she like me' answer in seconds. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Good for you! PS - Awesome avatar. I did drumline in HS and miss my marching days <3 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Do_The_Herp Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Um experience approaching and speaking to women.....duh? And I don't know how all of a sudden the girl OP spoke to is a "bitch that stormed away"... I imagine if I was acting in the way OP described towards a random girl who asked me for notes and then asked me about my class, they wouldn't think highly of me either. A jerk is allowed to act like one, but those that they treat like garbage are also allowed to think of them as such. Who cares though? Do you completely ignore dudes who try to make friendly conversation, maybe assuming that they're interested and you're not? Are you in a projecting sort of mood? Maybe you think I was being misogynistic or projecting entitlement? I could've just as easily called the girl an *******, if it'd make you feel better. lol Link to post Share on other sites
Author iDrumKing Posted November 4, 2014 Author Share Posted November 4, 2014 Good for you! PS - Awesome avatar. I did drumline in HS and miss my marching days <3 Right!? I marched corps for 2 years. Loved HS band a lot too! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author iDrumKing Posted November 4, 2014 Author Share Posted November 4, 2014 good for you. more men should just get it done. you have your 'does she like me' answer in seconds. Thanks a lot! Sometimes you just gotta DO IT. I knew that there were many people like me, who are scared to approach, so I used it as an advantage. I stepped up to the plate. Although it didn't go well, I fell great about it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SunshineOnMe Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Unless she gave you a sign/invite, you shouldn't have gone up to her. She probably felt like you were bothering her. FAIL. Just make sure next time to look for signs. Good job on not being scared though. Link to post Share on other sites
endlessabyss Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Unless she gave you a sign/invite, you shouldn't have gone up to her. She probably felt like you were bothering her. FAIL. Just make sure next time to look for signs. Irrelevant. I've approached a couple of times with no signs, and got a few good responses. It's hit or miss. If OP was a model, do you think signs would have mattered? Link to post Share on other sites
SunshineOnMe Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Irrelevant. I've approached a couple of times with no signs, and got a few good responses. It's hit or miss. If OP was a model, do you think signs would have mattered? Still though, OP should be more aware. I know that if I'm doing something, the last thing I want to do is be hit on. Link to post Share on other sites
mexcity Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Sometimes I wonder why even bother cold approaching women. Statistically, it will end with a FAIL. Why even try. I only had to try once to learn that lesson. Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Unless she gave you a sign/invite, you shouldn't have gone up to her. She probably felt like you were bothering her. FAIL. Just make sure next time to look for signs. Good job on not being scared though. I dont think you should require a sign/invite to simply speak to someone. She isn't the Queen of England. If the person isn't very responsive, well there is the information you need. Thats the "sign" right there. Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 True, or she could have been the introvert type or the type that is non-discriminatory and talks to everyone and just being friendly. But hey, some just want to put the *itch shields up from the get go. Someone you wouldn't want in your life anyhow. I love how we subtly test women these days to see if they truly like us with these small body language cues. You can have your answer in seconds. Anyways cudos for trying. NEXT! Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Unless she gave you a sign/invite, you shouldn't have gone up to her. She probably felt like you were bothering her. FAIL. Just make sure next time to look for signs. Sunshine, stupid advice....don't listen to Sunshine, he was already looking for the signs. Why should he have an "invitation"? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Still though, OP should be more aware. I know that if I'm doing something, the last thing I want to do is be hit on. Get over yourself, hon, you're not all that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts