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OLD, our true potential or a mirage of it?


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Would you say that OLD would make finding an accurate match better? Could it be that the exposure to so many messages from so many different kinds of people makes us realize our own true potential as opposed to real life where your dating pool would be relatively smaller?

 

Basically do you believe the only reason IRL dating has yielded better results is because the other person does not know their own self worth similar to a someone who has no knowledge of coins finding an extremely rare cent and selling it to a pawn shop for a few bucks when in reality it is worth much more?

Would this be a valid analogy or is there something more to it?

Looking forward to the discussion.

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normal person

In my experience, I end up liking people I meet via OLD with the same sort of frequency that I do meeting people anywhere else. The ratio of like to dislike is the same, it's just that OLD broadens the sample size because it provides an easy avenue for people to get into contact with you.

 

If you're a desirable person then you're going to get attention from "different types of people" whether it's online or in person. It's never really struck me as a self worth thing. You'll disregard most of the attention you get online the same way you'll disregard most of the attention you get in person.

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No. I think both have some validity. Not all people are wired the same way. I am well aware of my own self worth but since I don't even like shopping on line, I didn't care for OLD.

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Would you say that OLD would make finding an accurate match better? Could it be that the exposure to so many messages from so many different kinds of people makes us realize our own true potential as opposed to real life where your dating pool would be relatively smaller?

 

Basically do you believe the only reason IRL dating has yielded better results is because the other person does not know their own self worth similar to a someone who has no knowledge of coins finding an extremely rare cent and selling it to a pawn shop for a few bucks when in reality it is worth much more?

Would this be a valid analogy or is there something more to it?

Looking forward to the discussion.

 

We've been over this. OLD allows women to date WAY above their league and gives them a false sense of their attractiveness.

 

It also forces most men to date below their league and gives them a false sense of their attractiveness as well, except in the other direction.

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We've been over this. OLD allows women to date WAY above their league and gives them a false sense of their attractiveness.

 

It also forces most men to date below their league and gives them a false sense of their attractiveness as well, except in the other direction.

 

its a valid point, so many profiles and so many pictures. Like a giant weird kind of supermarket where you judge human beings like jars on a shelf lol.

 

Having said that it gives a lot of people options to meet those who they normally wouldnt so its not all bad.

 

I am chatting to two nice looking, seemingly nice personality-based women. One 20 and the other 25. Neither I or they have complimented looks. There was enough info in the profiles and obviously attraction to keep chatting.

 

I have their numbers now and probably date them next month. See how it goes. Not a lot of options in my hometown which makes OLD aviable option as it does for a lot of people

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We've been over this. OLD allows women to date WAY above their league and gives them a false sense of their attractiveness.

 

It also forces most men to date below their league and gives them a false sense of their attractiveness as well, except in the other direction.

 

So what would be causing all of this? The male to female ratio on the sites or something else?

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So what would be causing all of this? The male to female ratio on the sites or something else?

 

Women develop a false sense of their own attractiveness due to media portrayals of women being superior to men and the fact that women receive more support as children than men. Adding to that is the fact that many men will have sex with anything. So you'll have really good-looking men having sex with average to ugly women. This gives women a skewed sense of what they can reasonably attract.

 

Thus, as another female poster displayed, you'll have the really good-looking guys blowing through a number of average to below average women (as well as getting the hotter ones). The average to below average men, however, are unable to get women on their level because all of these women are having sex with the good-looking men.

 

It's really simple once you have a good understanding of women.

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Women develop a false sense of their own attractiveness due to media portrayals of women being superior to men and the fact that women receive more support as children than men. Adding to that is the fact that many men will have sex with anything. So you'll have really good-looking men having sex with average to ugly women. This gives women a skewed sense of what they can reasonably attract.

 

Thus, as another female poster displayed, you'll have the really good-looking guys blowing through a number of average to below average women (as well as getting the hotter ones). The average to below average men, however, are unable to get women on their level because all of these women are having sex with the good-looking men.

 

It's really simple once you have a good understanding of women.

 

Yup, and then you hear all of their stories of how these guys left them for someone else when in reality they never planned to stay for long anyways.

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So what would be causing all of this? The male to female ratio on the sites or something else?

 

because men do the chasing. I think it would make it a completely different story if very attractive women didnt just wait for guys to come to them.

 

If we shook up what is hard wired into us. hyperthetically speaking - women chase men now, period!

 

The results would be quite interesting (i realise its not set in stone and women do ask guys out but the bigger picture!)

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Women develop a false sense of their own attractiveness due to media portrayals of women being superior to men and the fact that women receive more support as children than men. Adding to that is the fact that many men will have sex with anything. So you'll have really good-looking men having sex with average to ugly women. This gives women a skewed sense of what they can reasonably attract.

.

Sounds like men are responsible here. Being selfish and screwing over our fellow men.

Thus, as another female poster displayed, you'll have the really good-looking guys blowing through a number of average to below average women (as well as getting the hotter ones). The average to below average men, however, are unable to get women on their level because all of these women are having sex with the good-looking men.

 

It's really simple once you have a good understanding of women.

 

Right, they're human and not much different than men. They'll take the best they can get, except they won't sleep with anything.

 

I don't mean to play white knight, but I think this is the result of so many men being selfish and not giving a damn about anything but themselves.

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because men do the chasing. I think it would make it a completely different story if very attractive women didnt just wait for guys to come to them.

 

If we shook up what is hard wired into us. hyperthetically speaking - women chase men now, period!

 

The results would be quite interesting (i realise its not set in stone and women do ask guys out but the bigger picture!)

 

We don't communicate and look at the big picture and try work with each other, something women do. Instead we're in it for ourselves and throw each other under the bus to get what we want.

 

 

Mr. Dave, I haven't seen you in while, welcome back. :)

Edited by jay1983
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Ahhh if only all men bonded together and stopped messaging women, imagine the possibilities!

 

Or perhaps if someone came up with with a new ingenious version of online dating in favor of men.

 

I'll keep dreaming

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Ahhh if only all men bonded together and stopped messaging women, imagine the possibilities!

 

 

There's nobody out there telling men we need to do this. I've seen some videos and articles showing you proof of what happens on these dating sites, but none that say hey we should all opt out of online dating. If we all do this...(so on and so forth)

 

I see more of "step up your game and be better than everybody" type of shyt.

Edited by jay1983
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Ahhh if only all men bonded together and stopped messaging women, imagine the possibilities!

 

Or perhaps if someone came up with with a new ingenious version of online dating in favor of men.

 

I'll keep dreaming

 

Nothing will ever be done in favor of men. Unfortunately, we were born too late for that. We were born into the era of female supremacy.

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Nothing will ever be done in favor of men. Unfortunately, we were born too late for that. We were born into the era of female supremacy.

 

And have the men of the past and each other to blame for this. What do men tell each other? "Man up, stop whining"

Edited by jay1983
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And have the men of the past and each other to blame for this. What do men tell each other? "Man up, stop whining"

 

Agreed. Men should stick up for each other more and stop viewing each other as adversaries.

 

It's us versus them, gentlemen.

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How about this, a dating site where no one is allowed to message each other, only a team of highly trained specialists will match you up once a week with your best possible match of off the whole website. That will make the matching process that much more unique since it is only one person out of so many.

 

The attraction of this idea will be that you won't really have to do any searching therefore more men would sign up for it. On the other hand women would be the losers in this case.

 

Or take it one step further, create an app that messages all of the women on the website for you, thus paving the way for my previous idea since the messages would become meaningless.

 

What do you think?

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only a team of highly trained specialists will match you up once a week with your best possible match of off the whole website. That will make the matching process that much more unique since it is only one person out of so many.

 

In a sense EHarmony...

 

I am attracted to very few, lets see, their brains, their emotion, their looks, their sins... While I forgive on a friend level, there will be a great majority in the OLD realm who just aren't it for me. Then add that a number of them lie. I wish there was the "Highly trained specialist" you mention. What you describe would distill the folks who are on there with no intention of meeting. The Expert would cancel them for not engaging interest, eh? Add an Ebay feedback thingy, which grades an aggregate score of post-date evaluations, not a "numbers" revelation, and the behavior/truthfulness of the individual would reveal itself.

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Would you say that OLD would make finding an accurate match better? Could it be that the exposure to so many messages from so many different kinds of people makes us realize our own true potential as opposed to real life where your dating pool would be relatively smaller?

 

Basically do you believe the only reason IRL dating has yielded better results is because the other person does not know their own self worth similar to a someone who has no knowledge of coins finding an extremely rare cent and selling it to a pawn shop for a few bucks when in reality it is worth much more?

Would this be a valid analogy or is there something more to it?

Looking forward to the discussion.

 

:confused:

 

I don't really understand...

 

But in a word, no.

 

I don't see knowing your self worth and realizing your true potential in any way related to OLD. If anything, people can make the self they want which may be nothing like their true selves, hence the problem of catfishing and such. So I'm sorry, I don't at all equate authenticity and realizing your true potential via online dating.

 

However, yes a benefit, which is totally separate from self worth, is that you do get exposed to more people and that may widen your pool of matches and give you a higher number of potential people to meet than perhaps just going about your life. It's still a grab bag many times though, especially depending on who you are and what you want. I don't think I'm the average women and I'm definitely not shallow and want a man who can meet me on an intellectual, emotional, spiritual and physical level and I'm looking for a real relationship not just hooking up or FWB...and that's not easy to come by, in real life or online. So majority of the men who message me are men I have zero interest in and the men I do find I'm interested are ones I may find after flipping through every 100 profiles. But like I said, I don't see this as in anyway related to true potential.

Edited by MissBee
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