JuneJulySeptember Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 Men only answer. Could you live off of a woman whether you are a stay at home dad or just a married guy without any kids? Either one. That means you don't have a job and that whatever money you need for things like a night at the bar, to buy a nice pair of pants, to go to a concert, or to get something fixed on your car must come from your wife/partner. Could you do it? Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 You only want men to answer but I can give you two examples of this: For eleven years, I supported a struggling musician. I eventually ended the relationship when I felt he wasn't trying hard enough with his endeavors and I was tired of working three jobs. I also have a very good friend (food writer) who has a house husband; he does EVERYTHING from her clothes shopping to groceries to housework and maintenance. They have been married 25 years. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
OwMyEyeball Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 Maybe as a stay-at-home dad if her career path was much more lucrative and stable than mine. Even then, just thinking about that ... it feels wrong Never say never, but from where I'm sitting right now, I wouldn't set aside my career to be a stay-at-home. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 Like Carrie, I'd have to comment that there are many creative types, especially musicians, who are perfectly happy to have someone support them while they pursue their craft. I would be hard-pressed to think of one who hasn't or wouldn't under the right circumstances, in fact. I have a neighbor whose wife is a doctor and he seems like a happy stay-at-home dad, and he does have his hands full and is very productive. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 (edited) Yes, I received excellent training from a very successful house manager who took the breadwinner's modest salary and created value for the entire family. The key? They were a team. The manager wasn't 'living off' the breadwinner, rather maximizing the value of their contribution and the whole family lived off that work product. Gender should be irrelevant in this day and age but, sadly, it is not. That's life! Great advice I received from the breadwinner: 'Son, it's not what I make, it's what your mother does with what I make. Never forget that'. I haven't. Edited September 16, 2014 by carhill 4 Link to post Share on other sites
ja123 Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 a house husband; he does EVERYTHING from her clothes shopping to groceries to housework and maintenance. They have been married 25 years. Now, I just got to make some more dough so I can get me one of those! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 I could never let a woman shower me with money and gifts or just pay the bills because she enjoyed being with me. But I guess if I felt my being there had a needed purpose for her I could swallow it. IE living rent free somewhere because a woman was disabled and needed some help everyday. But then we probably wouldn't be in a sexual relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 No, I could not do such a thing. I'd feel confined and kept. Not really in control of my own path. No, I am not a control freak. I will listen and cater to what I learn and be happy doing so. I just don't think I can be on the other side or it'd be very difficult for me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
WesternWizard Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 No way, Ray!!! Doing tasks for someone and helping them make plans, pay bills, etc etc is one way I express gratitude. Unfortunately, all my friends are too flaky to understand... Seriously, though, I would feel like a loser if I had to depend on ANYONE else to support me financially. I'd feel like a charity case. Women may not find handymen attractive... but I have to be doing something to stay busy, so much the better if it involves building or fixing things. Also, I wouldn't even think of dating if I was out of a job. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 Never in a million years... I wouldnt knock it, but its not for me....Ive seen these types of arrangements...The woman treats the guy like a little child and the guy is pretty much totally emasculated.. Like another poster stated.,,Its not about control., I just dont like the idea of anyone-let alone a woman-being in the role of deciding what I do and how much of an allowance I get.. TFY Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 It's what my parents did. My dad hasn't worked for 25 years. He was stay at home dad while mom worked. Once I was old enough though, he never went back to work. Just a permanent early retirement. Mom still works. Link to post Share on other sites
Candy_Pants Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 Never in a million years... I wouldnt knock it, but its not for me....Ive seen these types of arrangements...The woman treats the guy like a little child and the guy is pretty much totally emasculated.. Like another poster stated.,,Its not about control., I just dont like the idea of anyone-let alone a woman-being in the role of deciding what I do and how much of an allowance I get.. TFY :rolleyes: Not about control?? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 I can't do it. I am fine with my SO making more than me but I can't see me be a happy stay-at-home father with no employment. That would be the time where I would truly feel worthless to society. I rather continue working at Walmart than accept such an agreement. Besides, what would happen if she loses her employment? I definitely prefer the back up plan if that happens. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 Ew. The way you guys portray it as being 'worthless' or feeling 'confined and kept', yet it's something women have been doing since the beginning of time? Do you feel that women are worthless if they stay home and are 'kept' by their partner? What if you desperately wanted to be a father, and the woman earned more money than you and the only viable option would be for the man to stay home? Would you sacrifice having children for your pride? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Priv Posted September 16, 2014 Share Posted September 16, 2014 Definitely. I will be the stay at home dad if she is filthy rich. While she works I will be the best dad ever learning them how to drive in my ferrari cruising the Alps. Or learning them how to navigate in my 40meter yacht exploring the mediterranean sea. You know, just teach them basic survival skills. I have no problems whatsoever with this scenario. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
lino Posted September 19, 2014 Share Posted September 19, 2014 I'd do it happily. The chances of finding a woman who would accept such an arrangement are less likely than winning the lottery however. Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 Ew. The way you guys portray it as being 'worthless' or feeling 'confined and kept', yet it's something women have been doing since the beginning of time? Do you feel that women are worthless if they stay home and are 'kept' by their partner? What if you desperately wanted to be a father, and the woman earned more money than you and the only viable option would be for the man to stay home? Would you sacrifice having children for your pride? I am sure the women in the past would welcome the ability to work and have careers just like how the current women is doing. I don't blame them. To completely rely on another person can easily lead to a world of problems. Just ask my mom, who relies on her 4 sons. It is hell not just for her but for everyone. Nowadays, job security basically doesn't exist anymore. Even for low-end jobs like mine, I have seen people get fired for nothing. Due to that, both people has to work. Sometimes, one person has to work two jobs. Unless one is making 6 figures or is very frugal, there is no room for a stay-at-home parent. Link to post Share on other sites
bastus Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 I'd do it happily. The chances of finding a woman who would accept such an arrangement are less likely than winning the lottery however. good point but it still fairly possible imo,several previous posts here told that. in my humble opinion , the real problem if i am about to do this role, is how to deal with a newborn starving baby , One day in the morning while she is already late for Works, she ask me to take care our baby , and i ended up saying this to her , " suree .. Just lend me your breasts, and we'll be on our way.." Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 (edited) .............................. Edited September 20, 2014 by thefooloftheyear Link to post Share on other sites
OwMyEyeball Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 Ew. The way you guys portray it as being 'worthless' or feeling 'confined and kept', yet it's something women have been doing since the beginning of time? Do you feel that women are worthless if they stay home and are 'kept' by their partner? What if you desperately wanted to be a father, and the woman earned more money than you and the only viable option would be for the man to stay home? Would you sacrifice having children for your pride? Enough women felt that way to spark a movement that has radically shifted social norms across many nations. Feminism has been, at its core, about choice. And many women are choosing self-sufficiency over reliance on a sole provider. This is recent. Men have been suffused with the requirement of self-sufficiency since the beginning of time. We take tremendous pride in our work. Many men identify themselves by the work they do. To give that up for anyone would be extremely destabilizing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JFReyes Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 I lived off my girlfriends', other friends' and relatives' help last year for six months when I lost my high paying job (but I got another one that paid much less). In the end, she dumped me and threw away a 10 year relationship. As has been discussed elsewhere, there is a double standard. Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 My H did that for a few years. Worked for us. Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 I just dont like the idea of anyone-let alone a woman-being in the role of deciding what I do and how much of an allowance I get.. TFY In a partnership, I don't think it has to (or should) work that way. When I was the breadwinner, I wasn't deciding what my husband was doing, or deciding his allowance. We made financial decisions together. If anything, I prioritised him over myself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 ^ I actually have never felt comfortable to let a man be the one to support me. Now, I'm guessing if I had had kids, that would have quickly changed out of necessity. When I was younger a couple of my friends, because I really loved luxury, would suggest I'd do well marrying a rich guy, but I was never like that. I had my own dreams and things to accomplish. I truly feel better taking care of myself in most ways, plus after seeing the situations a couple of my girlfriends have gotten themselves into who did have kids and then the husband made all the money and how unhappy they were with the power shift after that happened, I just know it's not for me. Now, if I were doing pretty well myself and continued to work and just happened to have some rich guy who didn't play power games with his money on me, then of course I'd be more comfortable with it. But I'd never just stop having an avenue to work and get out if I needed to. I'd keep my foot in something, as security. Link to post Share on other sites
c57dood Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 Never. I'd rather be homeless and destitute than to allow a woman to control me. Even the guys that bring home the bacon who are still at the mercy of their wives/girlfriends are pathetic. Yet this is the result of the feminized mangina society we live in. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts