Not date someone because of a stereotype?

[irc333]

I have a couple of male, single friends that tell me that they won't date Latina women only because they have hot heads (tempers). I was like "Huh?" Not sure why one would stop dating someone by lumping them into the same bunch.

 

But isn't silly, esp. in a region where Hispanics are almost the majority, to just write off a Hispanic woman only because you assume the next Hispanic woman you meet will blow her top?

[J2911]

Yeah, your buddies aren't real cool for their thought process.

That's being stereotypical and judgmental. Good for you for seeing that and having a different mindset

[R3d]

This is why I hate being of Indian descent.

[irc333]

This is why I hate being of Indian descent.

 

I'm sorry to hear about that. What is it people say of those of Indian descent? What's the stereotype of them?

 

Does it matter if it's an Indian male or female? I hear that Indian males have it rough, dating-wise, here in the states...where as I don't THINK Indian females have an issue with men being into/attracted to them.

[WesternWizard]

It's not good to date---or refuse to date---someone because of a stereotype.

 

But if they act out that stereotype, that's another matter entirely.

[R3d]

I'm sorry to hear about that. What is it people say of those of Indian descent? What's the stereotype of them?

 

Does it matter if it's an Indian male or female? I hear that Indian males have it rough, dating-wise, here in the states...where as I don't THINK Indian females have an issue with men being into/attracted to them.

 

I am an Indain guy and yeah, that's what I hear too. Indian guys have it rough in the dating scene.

 

Women generally aren't attracted to Indian men and Indian men have stereotypes of being unhygienic, having a strong accent, being of an overly conservative family, and not being romantic and using women for sex.

 

There are some others I think.

[irc333]

I am an Indain guy and yeah, that's what I hear too. Indian guys have it rough in the dating scene.

 

Women generally aren't attracted to Indian men and Indian men have stereotypes of being unhygienic, having a strong accent, being of an overly conservative family, and not being romantic and using women for sex.

 

There are some others I think.

 

I heard of an article going around online about how an Indian man not only wants a wife, but to share his wife with his brothers, live under the SAME ROOF as his family, and perform cleaning and cooking duties while living there.

 

Apparently, that's the EXTREME stereotype of Indian men. Not sure about the sharing of the wife though...that's kind of strange, but there's some kind of frame of mind that Indian men want women to "serve" them as opposed to be partnered with them.

[R3d]

It's frustrating because obviously I believe in none of those things and am quite the opposite. I am a romantic guy, I respect women, am polite, Americanized, hygienic, no accent, etc. My parents are okay with me dating women of different races and pretty friendly and healthy. Recall that thread I started a few months ago about being Indian. Contrary to popular assumption that Indian men just want to get laid, I want a real romantic relationship. In fact like I said, I am considering staying a virgin until marriage, not because of religious reasons though. And not because I have a low sex drive, or anything like that.

 

I worry that women will recognize me as an Indian and immediately associate me as those men. That's why I am so hesitant to disclose my background whenever someone asks (rarely). It's a major insecurity for me. And unforunatrly, I do follow one sterotype of being Indian. I am short.

[preraph]

I do think some of the Indian stereotypes are fading with familiarity. I will tell you my first experience with Indians was when I was a buyer in an office attached to a warehouse. My assistant was a very sweet and articulate Indian girl. She had so much anxiety leading up to her arranged marriage that she had to be taken by ambulance to a hospital from work. So that gave me a very negative view of Indian tradition. Also, we had Indian males working in the warehouse, and they would always just stare at me, not smiling, just stare. They knew she worked for me, so maybe they were curious, but it didn't feel friendly at the time. But I loved my assistant very much and tried to learn what I could from her. She admitted there was some widespread abuse of women in the culture at the time.

 

Over the decades since then, Indians have become more commonplace where I live, Texas, and you see them in computer jobs, in physician jobs. My clinic doctors are both Indian, one female, one male. I like them very much. I do think a lot has changed in the decades since my initial experience in the 1980s and that internet has mainstreamed a lot of cultures, including Indian culture, as well as made American culture more tolerant and less fearful.

[WesternWizard]

Some people seem to get a kick out of behaving stereotypically. I've been to plenty of meetups and speed dating events where a LOT of both men and women behaved stereotypically.

[sdrawkcaB ssA]

I constantly change my style, even with the woman i am with. so i can see judgement over me on just on appeirance, i have fun not fitting into the norm, and it is easier to find peeps who are real.