hotpotato Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 On ls I frequently see posts putting down good looking men. Usually, its something like, "Alpha males want to spread their seed" or "Good looking men will cheat (not-so-good looking men wont)? Is that really true? Why are good looking men presumed tp be so...awful...compared to their less attractive counterparts? Most of the criticisms of good looking men could really encompass a lot of men in general regardless of their appearance. Is it really that bad to date a hot guy? Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Depends on if you're a hot guy or not. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Think of it this way, almost all guys want to have sex with as many women as possible. The really good looking guys simply have more opportunities to do so. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Not all attractive men are awful I personally think its all environment they are raised in. If good looking guys get a lot of attention and get thongs handed to them for being attractive, they are usually pretty tettiboe people. If they have a more normal life without the extra attention and have to work harder for things, they will usually be better people. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 My husband is drop dead gorgeous, movie star handsome, turns heads where ever he goes. He had no idea how good looking he was because as a child before contacts & the military, he was a geek & that is still his self image. The 1st thing my mother said to him is that he was "too good looking". All my friends urged me to drop him for the reasons you mentioned; they assumed based on what he looks like & all the women who throw themselves at him, that of course he would cheat. My husband is the most faithful guy I know. Loyalty & fidelity are incredibly important to him. He'd no more cheat then cut off his left arm. Until I started pointing it out to him half the time he had no idea women were hitting on him. Looks are only a small part of who a person is. What's inside matters but it's nice when it comes in a pretty package. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotpotato Posted September 9, 2014 Author Share Posted September 9, 2014 Think of it this way, almost all guys want to have sex with as many women as possible. The really good looking guys simply have more opportunities to do so. Every guy has plenty of options for sex. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotpotato Posted September 9, 2014 Author Share Posted September 9, 2014 Not all attractive men are awful I personally think its all environment they are raised in. If good looking guys get a lot of attention and get thongs handed to them for being attractive, they are usually pretty tettiboe people. If they have a more normal life without the extra attention and have to work harder for things, they will usually be better people. I certainly dont think they are. The best gug I know was handsome and over 6'5. He was perfect except for being a chrisgian fundamentalist. :/ Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Every guy has plenty of options for sex. If we are going to have a discussion , we need to live in reality land. 12 Link to post Share on other sites
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 I am not devilish... well that is my opinion. But I am not bad looking. I guess it is a matter of tastes. I don't work out, and don't bother with sun tans, so vanity is not an issue. So taking a few words from mates that I have been with, I am best right out of the shower. Now with that said, one relationship failed as soon as I was falsely accused of seeing other women. Funny thing is a female acquaintance had stopped and asked me that I could stay the night at her place. This happened right in front of my mate at the time. It surprised me, and made me uneasy because she would not take no, on the 2nd and 3rd attempt. As for controlling, nope I had a relationship that was very difficult in that she expected me to be controlling to show love. She literally thought I did not deeply care because I would not show jealousy or be upset at her freedoms. It took me three relationships to realize what my first one told me, in that I was too nice. So I stopped believing in slightly broken women are fixable with proper care. So, I kept to myself in thinking that if nobody can see me for what I am then all the trouble with creating a relationship is not worth my time. So you can say, my standards a minimal to have notice, yet difficult for an average woman to see, even if facing them out in the open. Funny thing my LDR saw me without even being in front of me. To me that makes a perfect start in any relationship, as long as it is not a FWB relationship. Then looks are everything. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotpotato Posted September 9, 2014 Author Share Posted September 9, 2014 If we are going to have a discussion , we need to live in reality land. Men can always pay for it if all else fails. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Men can always pay for it if all else fails. So can women. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotpotato Posted September 9, 2014 Author Share Posted September 9, 2014 So can women. Yes, but this is a thread about men. That being said, I know this will go off topic at some point lol Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Yes, but this is a thread about men. That being said, I know this will go off topic at some point lol You may have fulfilled your own prophecy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotpotato Posted September 9, 2014 Author Share Posted September 9, 2014 So not good looking men are more likely to be faithful because they dont have options (supposedly). Does that mean those men are involuntarily faithful? Does that really make them better mates? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotpotato Posted September 9, 2014 Author Share Posted September 9, 2014 You may have fulfilled your own prophecy. Indeed. Lol Link to post Share on other sites
Weezy1973 Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 I think men that want to sleep with many women (and see women more as sex objects) are more likely to put in way more effort into their physical appearance because they are trying to attract and sleep with a lot of women. That's why the impression might be that good looking guys are more likely to be players or unfaithful. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sillyanswer Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 So not good looking men are more likely to be faithful because they dont have options (supposedly). Does that mean those men are involuntarily faithful? Does that really make them better mates? They're only good because they can't be bad? Interesting idea! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Every guy has plenty of options for sex. And you know this how? Why do you believe that most of the men who complain about not being able to get dates aren't claiming to be attractive? Paying for sex absolutely does not count. It's completely different. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 So not good looking men are more likely to be faithful because they dont have options (supposedly). Does that mean those men are involuntarily faithful? Does that really make them better mates? That is the big question. It's almost like saying if you know you can get away with stealing anything you want, would you do it? Guys who are very attractive have to make the active decision to not to sleep around. They are always presented with a variety of options. On the other hand, guys who aren't attractive, aren't given options to cheat. So it is kind of about being involuntarily faithful. Though that belief can lead to the conclusion that if a an unattractive guy was actually given the chance to cheat he would take it; which isn't accurate. I think it's all about the nature of men. I do think that if a man has a lot of opportunities to sleep with lots of beautiful women, he's not going to settle down and just choose one. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 There's no truth to homely men being somehow of superior character to handsome men. Isn't it pretty to think so, though. Your character isn't formed based on how you look. Your confidence may be influenced by it to some degree, but that's not a given either. The handsomest man I knew confessed decades later that he was very insecure back in the day and he wondered if I could see it in him. He was the absolute most spectacular man in any room and his confidence seemed genuine to me. I guess he had to fake it until he made it. He confessed his insecurity was because he was considered terminally ill as a child, an immune disease, so he always thought of himself as weak. But he survived and made himself into a force to be reckoned with. It's true he had to peel women off him like old gum, but he was always as careful as he could be not to hurt their feelings, and he was known to intervene if he saw a man abusing a woman. And he wasn't always picking the most beautiful girl in the room either like most other guys did. I think when you're that good looking, you don't feel you need the trophy girl to make you feel like a man. Homely to average men are, if anything, even more anxious to put notches in their belts too, because they are trying to prove something to themselves and others. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 I've never experienced a conclusive correlation between evil (or unfaithful, or deceptive, or manipulative, or etc) men being good looking, as such traits cross all leagues of attractiveness. What is often seen, and outlined in this humorous comedy skit, is that people (men) who are perceived as widely attractive are more likely to get a pass on 'evil' behaviors like infidelity/promiscuity, etc. Why are good looking men presumed tp be so...awful...compared to their less attractive counterparts? People assign experienced and/or perceived behavioral patterns to aspects of people most easily visible, like their size, shape, color of skin, physical attractiveness, etc. You see some signs of that in the skit, which really doesn't address promiscuity or infidelity, rather sexual harassment at work. Certain labels are being attached. Is it really that bad to date a hot guy? IMO, no, it's the same getting to know process as with any other relationship, regardless of gender. Dating is about getting to know and one doesn't know until they know. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 (edited) As I know plenty of good-looking men who are faithful, it seems like a few of you are actually making the argument AGAINST dating a less attractive guy. Your argument comes out: These good-looking men are faithful because they WANT TO be (i.e., he ignores other women attracted to him because is truly in love with her), while an unattractive guy is faithful because he HAS TO be (i.e., he has no other options). I think most women would rather be with a guy who is faithful because he is truly in love with her, versus a guy who is faithful because he has to be because of lack of other options/desperation. Edited September 10, 2014 by Imajerk17 7 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Homely to average men are, if anything, even more anxious to put notches in their belts too, because they are trying to prove something to themselves and others. I have absolutely nothing wrong with the first part of your post, but why did you have to close with what you did and pretty much demonize less attractive men? Attractive men are not better, less attractive men are not worse. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 On ls I frequently see posts putting down good looking men. Usually, its something like, "Alpha males want to spread their seed" or "Good looking men will cheat (not-so-good looking men wont)? Is that really true? Why are good looking men presumed tp be so...awful...compared to their less attractive counterparts? Most of the criticisms of good looking men could really encompass a lot of men in general regardless of their appearance. Is it really that bad to date a hot guy? This situation actually worked in my benefit when a woman who had this frame of thinking. SHe just assumes that all good looking guys will cheat or treat her like crap. So she dated an average joe like me. lol Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotpotato Posted September 10, 2014 Author Share Posted September 10, 2014 And you know this how? Why do you believe that most of the men who complain about not being able to get dates aren't claiming to be attractive? Paying for sex absolutely does not count. It's completely different. Paying for sex absolutely does count. It is still an option whether or not you take it. Im not saying anybody is lying about being unattractive. This is a thread about demonization of hot men. Link to post Share on other sites
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