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Men being able to cook an attraction for women?


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I'm a bit of a novice cook, tend to dabble in few of some of my recipes., but it's often touted BY women that they just LOVE a man who can cook.

 

The other night, I brought a Mexican Casserole that everyone seemed to fall in love with. It was a private party at someone's house so these people I knew somewhat well, others on an acquaintance level. The host only had met me a handful of times, but I guess got a vibe that I was a decent individual enough to invite. But most of the people she invited I knew rather well.

 

She invited her co-worker, a rather attractive nurse, to the event. We had a pretty long talk about her field and what kind of families we grew up in that were somewhat similar in nature...the structured, disciplinarian parents, but really loving families, etc.

 

Anyhow, one of the women (she's got a boyfriend and they have both known me for a long time), said, "Women just love a man that can cook! You're definately a keeper IRC!"

 

The host (recently divorced.) was like, "You should find yourself a wife, get married, etc, etc" I had to laugh a bit. She also asked me why I'm still single. Felt like I was being a bit drilled, but I just used the canned, "I Just haven't met the right one yet", but I did supplement with having known family members who have been to hell and back in certain miserable marriages and divorce situations...so I tend to keep an eye out for those who may be unhealthy for me.

 

The boyfriend of the girlfriend did concur that there are a lot of "Crazy" women out there. He went through two marriages to a couple of "barbies" until he found his "one".

 

There were a couple of other guys like me, single and as the evening was winding down...the woman with the boyfriend said, "All 3 of you are nice guys, you'll definitely find 'the one'".

 

Yeah, you know where this is leading, to another "Nice Guy thread"...but just of a different color, but in THIS situation....where you have people that are telling you, "You are all GREAT guys...you'll find a a great gal!"

 

Hell, I can cook, at least I have something going for me! LOL

 

Anyhow, it was also kind of funny, I think the nurse kind of took a liking to me, gave me a big hug before saying good-bye and said, "It was so nice meeting you, you're such a sweet heart!"

 

It was kind of a shocking moment that pretty much was contrarian to how welcome the "Online Dating Community" has been lately. LOL

 

But, all that being said, should I welcome these compliments? Should I walk away from these compliments and take as they are, or wind up being the bitter, "Yeah yeah, women SAAAAY they want a nice guy, but...well...you know."

 

Anyways, after all this being said, ever been in situations where you have 3rd parties telling you how WONDERFUL you are, but yet you've been single all your life, rejected, or even been a victim of a woman choosing the jerk over you?

 

It's amazing how people...in general...tell YOU how wonderful YOU are, but for some strange reason, you're not getting results??

 

Input anyone?

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My guy cooks quite well; it's definitely a plus point, but obviously there's much more to him than just that.

 

Cooking is good but you can't expect women to fall in your lap just from having a basic adult skill.

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My guy cooks quite well; it's definitely a plus point, but obviously there's much more to him than just that.

 

Cooking is good but you can't expect women to fall in your lap just from having a basic adult skill.

 

 

Doesn't really answer the question of those post, just part of it..its more of a segue into the real deal.but, since you just answered THAT part, then why do some women make a big deal about it?

 

Why are they singing accolades about my "basic adult skill"? "WOW, you cook?? Holy crap, and no woman wants you???????"

 

I am like, "Yeah, I know right??" LOL But anyhow, they know more about me than my cooking skills though and maybe they're putting it all together about me. Perhaps I should've rephrased the title of the thread?

 

But it goes DEEPER than that as you can see from the rest of my post.

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Doesn't really answer the question of those post, just part of it..its more of a segue into the real deal.but, since you just answered THAT part, then why do some women make a big deal about it?

 

Why are they singing accolades about my "basic adult skill"? "WOW, you cook?? Holy crap, and no woman wants you???????"

 

I am like, "Yeah, I know right??" LOL But anyhow, they know more about me than my cooking skills though and maybe they're putting it all together about me. Perhaps I should've rephrased the title of the thread?

 

But it goes DEEPER than that as you can see from the rest of my post.

 

They're trying to be nice to you by giving you a compliment and some encouragement. It's just what people do, and some people take it a bit too far.

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They're trying to be nice to you by giving you a compliment and some encouragement. It's just what people do, and some people take it a bit too far.

 

I'm not sure I agree, do you honestly they are doing it just "to be nice" or do you think there's some real validity in what they're saying to me and the other 2 guys?

 

That we are "good catches" and we will most certainly find "the one".

 

I just want to emphasize I didn't bring up my dating situation with them, THEY did.

 

To be honest, I was feeling pretty good about what they were saying, but perhaps this message board was a bad idea to start this post. :p

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I'm not sure I agree, do you honestly they are doing it just "to be nice" or do you think there's some real validity in what they're saying to me and the other 2 guys?

 

That we are "good catches" and we will most certainly find "the one".

 

I just want to emphasize I didn't bring up my dating situation with them, THEY did.

 

To be honest, I was feeling pretty good about what they were saying, but perhaps this message board was a bad idea to start this post. :p

 

I'm not sure what your question is, really. Is it a good thing to be able to cook? Sure! Is it an instant chick-magnet? No. Can anyone really predict whether you will definitely find 'the one'? No. What's up with what those women said then? They were trying to be nice, BUT that doesn't mean that cooking isn't a good thing - it still is. Should you welcome those compliments? Of course you should always respond nicely when people say nice things about you. Should you walk away with bitter 'nice guys never win' talk? Absolutely not; other women will be watching and that is a huge turn-off.

 

Did I cover everything?

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Disillusioned

Well... yes and no.

 

We men like to brag about being able to cook with charcoal, but it's been my experience that there are a lot more meat-and-potatoes men than women. Almost all the women I've known have to have their greens, and these tend to have bitter flavors that I find impossible to enjoy. :(

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not a dealbreaker for me, and not a 'turn-on' or selling point either, unless the guy is a trained chef in which case he prolly makes some great meals. most guys who have cooked for me are just average cooks and I can make the same dishes better. I don't care either way

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Well... yes and no.

 

We men like to brag about being able to cook with charcoal, but it's been my experience that there are a lot more meat-and-potatoes men than women. Almost all the women I've known have to have their greens, and these tend to have bitter flavors that I find impossible to enjoy. :(

 

 

Disill, and what's the trend with this silly "Kale" stuff....I recall a woman saying, "I like to eat kale...even before it was popular!"

 

As if it was something to brag about. ;-)

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Disill, and what's the trend with this silly "Kale" stuff....I recall a woman saying, "I like to eat kale...even before it was popular!"

 

As if it was something to brag about. ;-)

 

It's called chit chat. Small talk. And kale is good for you.

 

Is there nothing you don't take issue with?

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They are saying that they see something about you that is attractive, that's all. You apparently have the nice guy vibe and yes, the right woman will come along eventually. You just have to keep looking and keep being you so stop with the negativity.

 

As for the cooking... yes I'd like a man who can cook as I'm terrible at it... so for me it would be really nice to have a man who can cook well AND likes it.

 

Go ask the nurse out! If you are interested in her that is!

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So, in your thread, I counted 3 issues/questions:

do ladies like guys who can cook?

Should you welcome these compliments?

People tell you how wonderful you are, but you get no results?

 

So...is it about knowing how to cook - or knowing how to get laid?

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Personally, I can't cook and even if I could, I wouldn't because I hate doing it.

 

It was never an issue for me when dating.

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OP, you'll enjoy the comment from friends wives when experiencing my cooking/table dressing/bussing/cleaning/general kitchen skills....

 

'You'll make someone a good wife someday'

 

:D

 

'Nuf said!

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I think a man being able to cook is definately an attraction. It was a selling point when I was dating my husband. He would invite me over for dinner at his apartment sometimes, and cook up a pretty good meal. Nothing fancy, but always something good. One of the things about him that made him marriage material. Two out of three of my sons are also good cooks, and their wives/girlfriends are very appreciative of that.

 

 

My sister's ex husband, OTOH, couldn't cook if his life depended on it, and expected her to do all the cooking, which built some resentment since she was working full time and he would never lift a finger at home.

 

 

So it is a good skill to cultivate, and women do appreciate a man who can cook. Doesn't have to be gourmey cooking. I just finished eating lunch that my husband cooked (barbeque pulled pork sandwiches, with homemade oatmeal-raisin cookies that he made from scratch). One of the reasons I married him, and one of the reasons our marriage is still good.

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Well, learning how to cook certainly doesn't hurt. However, I doubt that when women look for compatible guys that one of the main things they look for is his ability to cook.

 

So if you want to do it, do it for your benefits. It won't give you a big advantage if the rest of you is still unwanted by the general woman.

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They say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. That could work for women too. It doesn't mean that you don't need other qualities to attract a mate, but it definately helps.

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Well, learning how to cook certainly doesn't hurt. However, I doubt that when women look for compatible guys that one of the main things they look for is his ability to cook.

 

So if you want to do it, do it for your benefits. It won't give you a big advantage if the rest of you is still unwanted by the general woman.

 

Another big deal, is the ability to dance . I actually heard a woman express that she won't date a man unless he knows how to salsa.

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Another big deal, is the ability to dance . I actually heard a woman express that she won't date a man unless he knows how to salsa.

Yes! Definately! The ability to dance well impresses many women. Dancing also was something that impressed me about my husband when we were dating, and one of my favorite things to do with my husband when we were dating was going dancing. We would go dancing every weekend. In fact, this was the reason my sister married her second husband. He was such a great dancer and this was their favorite thing to do together also. In fact, she had reservations about him as a long term partner for other reasons, but his dancing ability won her over. Not a wise plan on her part in the long run, as he ended up cheating on her and there were red flags when they were dating that she should have paid more attention to, but his dancing ability was what made her fall in love with him, because they had so much fun together doing it.

 

 

And you know what they say about a man who can dance . . .

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Married women being complimentary means very little,my friends wives all treat me nice and say im such a nice guy when am i goign to find a women blah blah blah but i get no results therye just saying it to be nice i wouldnt take it as anything more.

 

What single women think of you and how they react is more important,if you kepe getting rejected then you know what those married women are saying is bs the proof is in the pudding

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Sure its attractive to some women, but it doesn't help you much. If some woman loves that you can cook, guess what! you're going to be cooking. Hope you like cooking. I do like cooking but I want to meet a woman who is better at cooking than me. I don't want to be stuck in a relationship where I have a honey do list every morning. Don't give yourself the reputation of being a skilled work horse or that is what you will become. Being a decent cook is nice, but I wouldn't accent it as a skill unless you absolutely love to cook and are actually really decent at it.

 

Secondly, being a nice guy sweet heart is never good. Women are always like "You're such a sweet guy, you'll find someone great...But not me, excuse while I go sleep with this biker." Yeah its just false support as in they hope you will find somebody because they have theirs and its the nice thing to say. They aren't going to take action into helping you achieve that goal.

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Another big deal, is the ability to dance . I actually heard a woman express that she won't date a man unless he knows how to salsa.

 

I know I am stereotyping but I really doubt there is a lot of guys who has girlfriends and wives nearby that is capable of dancing......but then again, the majority of the women here can't dance either so I guess that evens out.

 

In your example, I don't blame her for having that requirement because dancing is one of her more serious hobbies, if I had to assume.

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Sure its attractive to some women, but it doesn't help you much. If some woman loves that you can cook, guess what! you're going to be cooking. Hope you like cooking. I do like cooking but I want to meet a woman who is better at cooking than me.

Hmm. My husband and I share the cooking duties at our house. I'm the gourmey cook in the family who will spend hours preparing a meal. My husband whips up a meal quickly that is good, but nothing fancy. I think it's fair that we both do the cooking, since we both have outside jobs as well. Same thing with my son and daughter-in-law. She's the gourmey cook in the family. He's the one who whips up something good quickly, and they share the cooking responsibilities as well.

I don't want to be stuck in a relationship where I have a honey do list every morning. Don't give yourself the reputation of being a skilled work horse or that is what you will become.
Why should men not do household chores? Women typically have full time jobs outside the home AND chores inside the home. Why should men be any different? The days of women having an outside full-time job AND doing all the household work is over. This is 2014. Real men in today's world realize they'll need to do both as well, or they are going to have a pretty unhappy, overworked wife at home. My ex brother-in-law had the attitude that, as long as he worked outside the home, he wasn't going to lift a finger in the home. That attitude damaged their marriage. Women don't put up with chauvanist males anymore who won't lift a finger around the house.

Being a decent cook is nice, but I wouldn't accent it as a skill unless you absolutely love to cook and are actually really decent at it.

I think most women would appreciate any decent cooking from a man. They don't expect gourmey skills.

Secondly, being a nice guy sweet heart is never good. Women are always like "You're such a sweet guy, you'll find someone great...But not me, excuse while I go sleep with this biker."

My sister married a nice guy sweet heart two years ago and is very happy with him. Her ex was a biker. My niece is about to marry a nice guy sweetheart also. Nice guys finishing last is a myth.

Yeah its just false support as in they hope you will find somebody because they have theirs and its the nice thing to say. They aren't going to take action into helping you achieve that goal.
These women DID take action to help him. The host invited him to her party, introduced him to her friend, and raved about his cooking skills to everyone at the party. I think that IS helping him.
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OP being that you're Walter White you should know how to cook :p

 

It's definitely a plus in the attraction category. I'm surprised at how many women I meet that are not well versed in the kitchen. A sign of our times.

 

I went to an aged basalmic vinegar store and the woman told me that about 70% of her customer base are men. Maybe they come in there to impress women.

 

I'm a bit more on the foodie side of things. Have several spices at my disposal, have had exotic meats, cook a bit on the 'gourmet' side so I think it helps me, but I don't do it necessarily because women may like it, I thoroughly enjoy it.

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