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LS dudes who can't get women


JuneJulySeptember

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JuneJulySeptember

I have mostly lurked for a while at LS and posted some more recently, and I have noticed an alarming trend.

 

The regular male posters who are unsuccessful with women who have been posting here for a while still have had no success with females in that time. OTOH, females who have come out of bad relationships end up in another one soon after. Other female posters who have whined about being in places where there no available men have hooked up in that time.

 

So, this is a serious point. Some of what I post here is venting, some is for fun, some is a little BS. But, in real life, you have to go out and DO. You have to be out and about and take your rejections, because there's going to be a lot of them. I might bitch and whine here, but in real life, I take my shots with women.

 

I do believe men in our shoes have gotten the mighty short end of the stick. And it's OK to whine sometimes. And it's good to know your odds and what you're up against. But you have to go out and approach women.

 

The women who have rejected you are being approached by other men and ending up in fruitful, happy relationships and having hot sex with men they like. While you are sitting there for years with nothing, still unable to get over her.

 

Use that as your motivation. Thanks. ;)

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I appreciate what you're trying to do here :).

 

Unfortunately, you'll have to excuse me, while I go to bed and get out of the way of the many excuses you are likely to read in the next 24 hours.

 

Good night ;).

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What I want to know is the reason that the men are struggling. Is it their looks, personality or both. If you have a physical flaw, can being charismatic and charming cause women to overlook it, or are you stuck unless you get very rich? I also want to know if these men are actually trying to improve themselves.

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JuneJulySeptember
What I want to know is the reason that the men are struggling. Is it their looks, personality or both. If you have a physical flaw, can being charismatic and charming cause women to overlook it, or are you stuck unless you get very rich? I also want to know if these men are actually trying to improve themselves.

 

I don't think there's any thing wrong with most of the men here who struggle with women. Do you see any threads here telling women to improve themselves so they can get an average man? The improvement thing is just a way for women to justify rejecting men.

 

Point blank, most women are just really picky.

 

Start at a reasonable level of woman, take a deep breath, and go at it. Expect a lot of failure before you get a bite. That's it. That's how it is. Know the rules of the game, and you'll save yourself a lot of pain.

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Start at a reasonable level of woman, take a deep breath, and go at it. Expect a lot of failure before you get a bite. That's it. That's how it is. Know the rules of the game, and you'll save yourself a lot of pain.

Try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail.

 

That's the rules right?

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JuneJulySeptember
Try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail, try and fail.

 

That's the rules right?

 

Basically.

 

Aim lower if you have to. But even if you aim lower, you still experience a significant amount of rejection.

 

Eventually you will hit one.

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fortyninethousand322
The women who have rejected you are being approached by other men and ending up in fruitful, happy relationships and having hot sex with men they like. While you are sitting there for years with nothing, still unable to get over her.

 

Eh, I have a bit of a martyr's complex. This is unlikely to motivate me. Besides, the last girl I dated, I don't think she's having hot sex with anyone...unless she's married, which last I checked she wasn't.

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I appreciate what you're trying to do here :).

 

Unfortunately, you'll have to excuse me, while I go to bed and get out of the way of the many excuses you are likely to read in the next 24 hours.

 

Good night ;).

 

Says the guy who lost his V because he was solicited online!

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Most of the men who are unsuccessful:

 

-don't actually try to get women, just theorize what it's like to ask women out/get rejected by them

-have serious flaws they either are unaware of or are choosing to ignore

-cold approach expecting success

-have no social circle

-are down on their luck/running into the wrong women

 

That last one is true. There's no denying that. Luck plays a part in dating. Some people are just unlucky. I remember when I was unsuccessful, a lot of it was on them, not on me. That's still true today. Some men/women just suck, plain and simple. People are quick to blame the person who's unsuccessful and say it's all on them. While I'm sure a good portion of it is, they are not the only variable in the equation. Some of the men/women they are dealing with are shallow, bitchy, arrogant, stupid, etc. People like that exist. Sometimes we run into them. Not everyone is a catch. Sometimes they go after the wrong people.

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JuneJulySeptember
Most of the men who are unsuccessful:

 

-are down on their luck/running into the wrong women

 

That last one is true. There's no denying that. Luck plays a part in dating. Some people are just unlucky. I remember when I was unsuccessful, a lot of it was on them, not on me. That's still true today. Some men/women just suck, plain and simple. People are quick to blame the person who's unsuccessful and say it's all on them. While I'm sure a good portion of it is, they are not the only variable in the equation. Some of the men/women they are dealing with are shallow, bitchy, arrogant, stupid, etc. People like that exist. Sometimes we run into them. Not everyone is a catch. Sometimes they go after the wrong people.

 

Luck plays a part, but the rules of the game brings the odds around eventually. That's why the attractive women here are able to bounce back from bad choices and bad relationships and have another man lined up in a month. Usually better than the last.

 

Unfortunately, the rules are working against these men. But with persistence, they can get some.

 

I have.

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fortyninethousand322

Sometimes you just don't see a point in trying. You see how women look at you (or more importantly not look at you) and you understand the reality. Either bribe some girl you're not all that into just to have a warm body in your life or accept a life of singleness. What's the point in putting your all out there for that?

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Says the guy who lost his V because he was solicited online!

Play your cards right and it could be you

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Why dont you see a point in trying. The fact is that people need relationships. It has been proven over and over again. There is a reason that single men have a higher suicide rate and are statistically more violent. The simple fact is that we need someone to be with societies with lots of single men tend to be more violent and unstable

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JuneJulySeptember
Sometimes you just don't see a point in trying. You see how women look at you (or more importantly not look at you) and you understand the reality. Either bribe some girl you're not all that into just to have a warm body in your life or accept a life of singleness. What's the point in putting your all out there for that?

 

If you 'give up' and allow things to 'happen naturally', i.e. meeting a few women over a few years that you click with, and just slowly try and develop something with them, you will probably end up marrying the first one you meet. There is also a real possibility you will be alone for the rest of your life. You're just not playing the odds.

 

You should ask for a woman's phone number within 30 minutes to a few hours of talking to her if you click with her. Expect to be rejected. Repeat until you get a hit.

 

Your choice if you want to give up.

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fortyninethousand322
If you 'give up' and allow things to 'happen naturally', i.e. meeting a few women over a few years that you click with, and just slowly try and develop something with them, you will probably end up marrying the first one you meet. There is also a real possibility you will be alone for the rest of your life. You're just not playing the odds.

 

You should ask for a woman's phone number within 30 minutes to a few hours of talking to her if you click with her. Expect to be rejected. Repeat until you get a hit.

 

Your choice if you want to give up.

 

Well, I'm also pretty clingy/needy. It's like an addiction. The only way to not be that way is to avoid interactions with women beyond the topical. Seriously, I'm just not someone who can be normal.

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By reading some of the advice here, it appears you have to be tall, rich, extra charming and, above all, manically happy with confidence through the roof just to get a date with a normal girl. The truth is, I often see women with deeply flawed people: unemployed, ugly, aggressive or depressive ones. The same goes for men's choice of women.

 

So I believe it's all a numbers game. You've got to keep trying to find that compatible person because you can't be compatible with everybody.

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JuneJulySeptember
I'm curious as to what some of you guys look like....

 

I'm not great looking, but I don't go for the best looking girls by a long shot.

 

I mean, your insinuation just hammers home the point of the thread.

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JuneJulySeptember
By reading some of the advice here, it appears you have to be tall, rich, extra charming and, above all, manically happy with confidence through the roof just to get a date with a normal girl. The truth is, I often see women with deeply flawed people: unemployed, ugly, aggressive or depressive ones. The same goes for men's choice of women.

 

So I believe it's all a numbers game. You've got to keep trying to find that compatible person because you can't be compatible with everybody.

 

Not to get a date, but to get her initially attracted to, yes, I do believe you need all that.

 

You can charm and work her, and get her later, but you'll face a lot of rejection before you get there.

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[quote=JuneJulySeptember;4542241

The women who have rejected you are being approached by other men and ending up in fruitful, happy relationships and having hot sex with men they like. While you are sitting there for years with nothing, still unable to get over her.

 

No, we're sitting here incel because we're on the low end of the looks scale and get instantly dismissed by women as unattractive and undesirable before we get a chance to show them who we are as a person. So, that's why we don't approach women. It would just be one sure rejection after another....

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Sometimes you just don't see a point in trying. You see how women look at you (or more importantly not look at you) and you understand the reality. Either bribe some girl you're not all that into just to have a warm body in your life or accept a life of singleness. What's the point in putting your all out there for that?

 

 

My philosophy is that I'd rather be single for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong.

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No, we're sitting here incel because we're on the low end of the looks scale and get instantly dismissed by women as unattractive and undesirable before we get a chance to show them who we are as a person. So, that's why we don't approach women. It would just be one sure rejection after another....

 

I hear you. It's all true.

 

Aim lower and go for volume. It's all about that.

 

Unless you'd be happier alone.

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I have mostly lurked for a while at LS and posted some more recently, and I have noticed an alarming trend.

 

The regular male posters who are unsuccessful with women who have been posting here for a while still have had no success with females in that time. OTOH, females who have come out of bad relationships end up in another one soon after. Other female posters who have whined about being in places where there no available men have hooked up in that time.

 

So, this is a serious point. Some of what I post here is venting, some is for fun, some is a little BS. But, in real life, you have to go out and DO. You have to be out and about and take your rejections, because there's going to be a lot of them. I might bitch and whine here, but in real life, I take my shots with women.

 

I do believe men in our shoes have gotten the mighty short end of the stick. And it's OK to whine sometimes. And it's good to know your odds and what you're up against. But you have to go out and approach women.

 

The women who have rejected you are being approached by other men and ending up in fruitful, happy relationships and having hot sex with men they like. While you are sitting there for years with nothing, still unable to get over her.

 

Use that as your motivation. Thanks. ;)

 

I posted here 2.5 years ago and the advice I got helped me get a 2.5 years relationship that was good for the first 2 years. The last 6 months have sucked, and I am back here, because I am thinking of ending things, and it feels good to read posts of those that are feeling the same feelings.

 

I think guys who get the advice they need and succeed (i.e. me) go away for a while, whereas the guys who do not succeed stay here and post about their frustrations, so I think it makes sense that those who are unsuccessful are the ones that are still posting about their frustrations, it does not mean that no guys are solving their problems.

 

I agree with your advice about telling people to go out, but sometimes people do have bad luck. This is no excuse to stop trying, but a lack of success does not prove a lack of effort.

 

You can go to 10 interviews which each have 10 candidates, and not get a job. The odds are not 1/10 x 10 = 100%. The odds are 1-(1/10)^10, which is 65%. Which is 1 in 3 people going to 10 interviews and still not getting a job.

If you went to 20 of the same interviews, you have an 88% chance of getting a job, but there will still be 1 in 8 guys who do not get a job.

 

The same thing goes for approaching girls. While it is true that the more girls you approach the better your chances, there will still be mathematical outliers who have "bad luck", and those outliers are for more likely to post than those who found a girl.

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