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I don't understand what she's trying to tell me


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I met this girl at work 3 months ago and immediately got along with her. I noticed how quickly she warmed up to me..she'd tease me, playfully hit me, i'd catch her staring all the time..she walk up to me just to talk and she'd laugh at pretty much everything I'd say. Safe to say she enjoyed my company. I also heard from a buddy of mine that she had a boyfriend but at this point I had developed feelings for her. I decided to ask her out (stupid I know) and I got a swift taste of reality when she said she'd get back to me on facebook but never did.

 

She brought it up a week after and justified her excuse to not go out with me by blaming it on the weather. Anyway..we moved past it and she began to flirt again..not as much...but I'd get a lot of stares when she thought I wasn't looking.

 

But after being rejected like that, I took everything she did as her just enjoying my company and my attention at work only. She wouldn't even really reply to any of my messages on facebook (I left her 2 and she replied with nothing). While doing this..I began focusing my attention on another girl I was getting along with real well..she was single.

 

Then one fine day at work..the original one saw how me and this new girl were talking (I caught her staring) ..and she was real quiet around me..she didn't even talk or say bye to me that night (completely uncharacteristic of her usual behavior back then). I guess she got jealous?

 

Things went back to normal and we continued our playful banter...but I was becoming extremely frustrated with the fact that many many weeks had passed by and nothing was really developing..not even in terms of a friendship. She'd just talk to me at work but outside of it..there was nothing. So I eventually burned out and cut the extra attention i was giving her and directed it on 2 other girls and my job. I wouldn't walk up to her and chitchat or flirt like I used to. So she seeked me out a few times and tried getting my attention with a few teasing comments and jokes. She'd say things like "this is the first time i've seen you tonight" or "Thre you are!" I let her know that I had been busy and that very night I went to take my lunch with this other girl. When I came back out with her..the one I'm talking about in this post saw me with her and turned around to stare at us when she thought she was out of my sight. I saw it..it was obvious..it's not in my head.

 

 

And now it's like she took our friendship and brought it a step down. I don't know if it's because she's seen me talking to other girls more or if it's cause I don't flirt with her like I used to. What I get now is a quick stare and a half assed tight lipped smile from her when she passes by and it's so irritating because I know it's fake. I don't understand why she's giving me this bs now when our friendship went passed the smiles and "hi's" and "bye's". Weve had plenty of good conversations and have flirted enough times and feeling like she went 10 steps back makes me want to forget her.

 

But then I thought..hey maybe I'm overreacting because I still have feelings for her so I cashed out a drink while she was on cash and she seemed stressed..so I suggested that she should smile a little more and that she should let me know when she was taking her lunch so that I could take mine with her. Sure enough..what does she do? She takes it without collaberating with me. What am I supposed to think?

 

What is her problem and what does she want from me?

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Nothing. It's called a mind f*ck. As you experience this more, you'll see the signs earlier and spend less time and energy on such people.

 

Remember, someone who is genuinely interested in you will not play these kinds of games. On the positive side, empathize with her poor BF and be glad you are not him :)

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