beetlebum Posted November 8, 2007 Share Posted November 8, 2007 i cant stop thinking about a lecturer at my university, we first met when i had to watch him at work and from the start i felt something strange about him, when he was talking to me he seemed to have a little smile on his face whihc is perhaps normal. we met again for a group teaching session and whenever he looked at me his eyes dilated noticeably and again he seems to smile. When i talked to him his gaze wasnt professional and seemed to be looking at my body more than anywhere else. im not sue if im reading to much into it but i think i do like him, not sure whether i should pursue now i feel? Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted November 9, 2007 Share Posted November 9, 2007 IF he's even interested in anything besides ogling an attractive student, you shouldn't pursue it until he's no longer your lecturer. Anything else is just trouble. Hold off until the end of the semester. Keep in mind, you could be over-analyzing and projecting your own feelings onto him. Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted November 9, 2007 Share Posted November 9, 2007 nj might be right. Some professors make the comparison between a faculty-student relationship and a relationship between a therapist and a patient, which is always considered unethical by professionals. "They are parallel, though not identical, issues," said Dr. Ralph Cancro, a clinical psychologist and chairman of the Psychology Department at Marymount College. "Just as there is a transference of emotion to the therapist, there is also a transference of emotion to the professor. I can understand certain circumstances where the professor appears almost God-like and therefore is highly regarded by the student. The young person can feel in love and can fall prey to any manipulation on the part of the professor," he said. from http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9F0CE1D61E3FF93AA35756C0A965958260&sec=&spon=&pagewanted=print Link to post Share on other sites
DutchGuy Posted November 9, 2007 Share Posted November 9, 2007 Hmm, aren't all women drawn towards powerful men? Women tend to fall for men they admire. Wouldn't that make all of these kind of relationships unethical? Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted November 9, 2007 Share Posted November 9, 2007 Hmm, aren't all women drawn towards powerful men? Women tend to fall for men they admire. Wouldn't that make all of these kind of relationships unethical? Only the ones where as the article points out, the powerful men in certain professions, are known to take advantage of the women who fall for them and get into multiple 'relationships' simultaneously as is the case with the examples in the article - therapists and lecturers tend to have a history of that, and it's therefore unethical and advised against with laws passed in certain universities and for all therapists, but the same laws do not apply to all other powerful men. Link to post Share on other sites
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