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Wedding Ring Design


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My wedding is on September. We will be having beach wedding in Jamaica. With my friend's and family's support everything is going fine. The resort and ceremony is arranged with the help of an agency.

 

My fiance is my high school sweet heart. We are in a relationship for 6 years now. How wonderful has it been. Finally we are happy to tie knot and be legal couples. I understand this is going to be a new chapter in our lives.

 

I have to pick a wedding ring. Since we didn't have an engagement, I'm not keen on bands. I want to buy her a lovely diamond ring. I'm confused which model to go for. Multi stone or single, vintage design or modern. We will be consulting a [fine diamond jeweler near here] next Monday. I'm thinking about custom designing a ring. But I need more ideas. I liked the three stone wedding ring. Need advice.

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T-16bullseyeWompRat

Ask her what she prefers. My wife liked three stone not solitaire. Pretty simple, just ask her preference. She doesnt need to know anything about the design so there is still an element of surprise. But i would ask if she prefers one over the other before moving forward. Even if you dont ask her, the gift from you will far outweigh everything else. She will think its perfect!

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What if you ask her to make a selection of various rings she likes and let that inspire you towards a final choice.

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There is a big difference between modern and vintage, I think most women will have a preference for one or the other so knowing the style is important. I'm a vintage gal and would not enjoy a modern design.

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Since your wedding is already planned and there is going to be no surprise proposal, talk to her!

 

Ask her:

 

"Hey honey. I was looking at rings. Do you prefer that I surprise you, or would you like to be involved in the process of choosing a ring?"

 

If she says "surprise me!" then use her style of dress and other jewelry as a guide to what she would like. Is she contemporary or traditional? Flashy or understated? One who enjoys unique pieces, or one who enjoys timeless classics? Since you are marrying her, you should be able to find something she would love.

 

If she says she would love to be involved, look on websites with her. Let her save her faves to Pinterest or a folder on the computer. Make the next few weekends about cruising different jewelry stores and looking at styles. If she finds an "out of the box" ring she just adores, get it! If she can't find one, work with her to have one custom made to her specifications.

 

Asking people on the internet is pointless because we all have our own opinions based on our own styles. :)

 

Congrats!

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  • 2 weeks later...
Miss Peach

My XH had one designed for me. He had them make it from a drawing and told them to make the setting indestructible since I am rough on jewelry. This gave it an unusual setting that I got a lot of compliments on.

 

I do really wish he would have asked me how I felt but understanding how it was a surprise I do wish he would have taken more queues for something to mesh with the items I picked out rather than the ones he did. I never really liked the style of my ring but he was the type of guy who would have been offended if I wanted to remake it into something I liked.

 

Besides what everyone else here are posting, also look at which metals she picks out. Is she a constant gold, silver, rose gold fan? How hard/active is she? For example if she likes silver it make make more sense to go titanium or platinum which looks very similar but can be better wearing. Would she want something with some heft (like platinum)? Or light?

 

Even if she wants it to be a surprise, I would find out what she likes in her current collection, look through some catalogs, etc. to get an idea of what appeals to her.

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  • 1 month later...

My wife and I picked it out together, well sort of, I let her pick what she wanted. She was always frugal and knew we would have to finance it. She picked out an engagement band and a simple ring. Total was 200 dollars and we had to get financing. It is small but she likes things that don't stick out so much. She still wears it 38 years later so it was a good investment.

 

Spending two months salary on a ring is just advertising from the jewelers. Its never been about how much you spend. At least it shouldn't be. I would for sure let her pick it out. She is the one who will wear it hopefully ever after.

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I find it very strange to pick your own engagement ring. Is it something considered normal in North America (I'm European)?

 

My boyfriend asked me whether I want to pick it myself and I just said a surprise will be better. That's what I personally feel more comfortable with. I assume he can guess my style anyway from the jewelry that I wear on day to day basis. In general that seems intuitive to me - if the woman wears a certain style of jewelry, the engagement/wedding ring will be similar style - it is another piece of her accessories.

 

 

Since your wedding is already planned and there is going to be no surprise proposal, talk to her!

 

Ask her:

 

"Hey honey. I was looking at rings. Do you prefer that I surprise you, or would you like to be involved in the process of choosing a ring?"

 

If she says "surprise me!" then use her style of dress and other jewelry as a guide to what she would like. Is she contemporary or traditional? Flashy or understated? One who enjoys unique pieces, or one who enjoys timeless classics? Since you are marrying her, you should be able to find something she would love.

 

If she says she would love to be involved, look on websites with her. Let her save her faves to Pinterest or a folder on the computer. Make the next few weekends about cruising different jewelry stores and looking at styles. If she finds an "out of the box" ring she just adores, get it! If she can't find one, work with her to have one custom made to her specifications.

 

Asking people on the internet is pointless because we all have our own opinions based on our own styles. :)

 

Congrats!

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I find it very strange to pick your own engagement ring. Is it something considered normal in North America (I'm European)?

 

It's not normal per se, but it's increasingly common. Personally I think it's a great idea. I wear earrings maybe once every two weeks and that's it; no one would ever be able to determine my style of jewelry just by knowing me. There are also lots of considerations that go into the decision. A friend of mine insisted her ring had to be something she would sit on because she frequently sits on her left hand at work!

 

I am very glad I got to pick out a style I liked. I looked at ring after ring, finding some I liked more than others, but something ignited in me when I finally saw THE one. It was like a light went off---"oooh!" I never would have known just by looking at the pictures or by looking at similar styles. It was just stunning.

 

One of my guy friends knew he could never hope to pick out a design his fiancee would like, so for the proposal he used a fake (but nice-looking) ring. He had actually bought her a gorgeous center diamond in her favorite shape/cut and told her she could design the rest and send him a check. It was a great decision for them.

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major_merrick

Others might disagree, but I tend to think that in a traditional heterosexual monogamous relationship leading to marriage, it seems a bit strange and inappropriate for a woman to be directly involved in picking an engagement ring. I also disagree with the "three months salary" rule when it comes to cost. But allow me to explain why.

 

As her husband-to-be, you've been in a relationship with her for quite a while. Getting her a ring she will love is a test of how well you know her tastes. I think that's part of why the tradition exists. Ask discrete questions, take note of what she wears, and you'll arrive at a pretty good idea. Bonus points if you can exactly size her finger without her figuring it out. When she receives it, the present will be a surprise and the fact that it fits and looks perfect will be such a compliment to her that you have taken the time to know her so well.

 

Normally, I think a surprise is more common for an engagement ring and less common for wedding bands. Since yours is more of an all-in-one unique situation, I think you can feel free to have a unique approach as well. Ultimately, it's your relationship and the decision is between you two.

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It's interesting to see contrasting opinions, L-B and MM. I see the point in both.

 

In our case I'm thinking he picks the engagement ring, and later we decide together on the design of wedding bands (although surely they will depend on the engagement ring design...).

 

This whole process makes me so nervous that I'll be happy with minimal involvement :D

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SaveYourHeart

Does she have a pinterest? If so, you can probably look on there and see what kind of designs she likes, her friends might be able to help too!

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RecentChange

I am the one wearing it every day, so I am glad I had input on its design.

 

My ring consists of a vintage stone (Asher cut) passed down from a relative of his, and a setting we picked out together. I love it. It's a mix of old and new, of both of our styles. I was able to try on settings and find one that showcases the stone, while not sticking out so far that it's easy to snag on things.

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