BlauFrau Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Does anyone else struggle with the dilemma of having a partner who is significantly more attractive than you?. I do and it sucks my fiancé is an ex model. Alone I look decently attractive I'd give myself an honest 6.5 maybe 7 without make up maybe a little more if I get out the putty knife and glob that **** on. But he on the other hand is a 9 or 9.5 in looks. It just tough. Sometimes rude people will point out how much more attractive he is than me. " like how did you manage to snag this guy" etc. All of his friends tried to convince him he could do better. I know it shouldn't bother me. He tells me I'm beautiful inside and out and he likes that I don't wear much make up. But I can't help feeling inadequate especially when I see a picture of us together and he looks like he just popped out of a magazine and I look like I need some serious tLc. Weight isn't a problem I'm fit and not over weight, just compared to him I'm an ugly duckling. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 My husband gets that all the time, "How did he manage to snag a hot lookin woman?"......he beams with pride. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I have beauty in my eye, so everywhere I look I see beauty. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author BlauFrau Posted July 2, 2015 Author Share Posted July 2, 2015 Yea everyone expects the girl to be the hot one. If the girl isn't people think something is off. If he was dating some one as hot or hotter no one would be questioning it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 If I were you I would feel like it to be a great accomplishment. Be happy with what you have and don't ruin it with insecurity......just beam with pride. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
VengeanceGuidesMe Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Es gibt ein Sprichwort auf Englisch. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Dein Freund hat schon gesagt, dass Er denkst dich sehr schön aussehen. Er findet dich total schön... Drinnen und Drausen. Seinen Freunden sind bei dir egal. Okay, on the off chance you're not German (BlauFrau!.. drunk woman in German) and for everyone else... or that my German isn't perfect.. yeah right. It doesn't matter what your boyfriends friends say. It only matters what he thinks. And he told you how he finds you beautiful inside and out. That means he loves you and it is what matters. If he does not stick by what he wants and succumbs or behaves in a manner wished by his friends, well then he is a spineless tool and you've actually had a blessing in disguise. I have had several girlfriends be insecure about being 'smart' enough for me. I don't care if someone is a genius or not, that isn't what makes a good partner. I care if I laugh with someone, enjoy conversation with them, find them attractive, and we make awesome love. Try to find some self assurance that he is into you for more than your looks. Try to listen and watch how he is with you, not how you think he may feel about you or how his friends feel about you. Just tell him you love him and be supportive and confident that he loves you and everything will be fine. Viel Erfolg! Link to post Share on other sites
Author BlauFrau Posted July 2, 2015 Author Share Posted July 2, 2015 If I were you I would feel like it to be a great accomplishment. Be happy with what you have and don't ruin it with insecurity......just beam with pride. Yea. I guess so. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 I was a shy ugly duckling in high school, but I managed to snag a hot BF, that all the girls were wondering how that happened. Even tried to steal him away from me, but he stuck right by me. I was envied by all the popular girls....it was the best ego boost ever. Link to post Share on other sites
S_A Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 It's hard for a woman to feel full of pride over such comments. It definitely comes off as offensive. And when women ask how you landed such a guy, I've noticed that such comments can sometimes be motivated by jealousy. Women like to compete with one another and they perceive you to be with a "better guy" than they have and wonder what it is that you've got that they don't got. My GF's parents are the same. The dad is much better looking than the mom and she does feel hurt about it. I guess I don't have any advice to give other than I get how you feel and that the other women are just hating on you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gary S Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 But that's the beautiful thing about love... while you may be beauty challenged, when they love you, you look better to them than you really are! Love changes everything. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 That is why I stop dating ugly woman . Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 That is why I stop dating ugly woman . Is your avatar, a pic of you? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
galgal818 Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Does anyone else struggle with the dilemma of having a partner who is significantly more attractive than you?. I do and it sucks my fiancé is an ex model. Alone I look decently attractive I'd give myself an honest 6.5 maybe 7 without make up maybe a little more if I get out the putty knife and glob that **** on. But he on the other hand is a 9 or 9.5 in looks. It just tough. Sometimes rude people will point out how much more attractive he is than me. " like how did you manage to snag this guy" etc. All of his friends tried to convince him he could do better. I know it shouldn't bother me. He tells me I'm beautiful inside and out and he likes that I don't wear much make up. But I can't help feeling inadequate especially when I see a picture of us together and he looks like he just popped out of a magazine and I look like I need some serious tLc. Weight isn't a problem I'm fit and not over weight, just compared to him I'm an ugly duckling. He doesn't seem to think so! He chose YOU. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 i do not find male models attractive, srsly 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 That is why I stop dating ugly woman . Krieger you literally JUST started a thread about trying not to be shallow... 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Is your avatar, a pic of you? Yes it is I know I am not a 10 but I am dam sure not a 5 I see myself more as a 6-7 out of ten. Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 (edited) Krieger you literally JUST started a thread about trying not to be shallow... well my thread was more about not trying trade up and love the one I am with. I just have to step back and say yea in life there always going to be a better looking woman interested but the woman I am dating brings a ton to the table that this girl will not bring. I believe in the 80/20 rule It like cell phone shopping or car buying there always going to be something better but a lot of the times what you have is great your just to blind to see it. Edited July 2, 2015 by Krieger Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 i do not find male models attractive, srsly funny you said that I took the career test in high school and it said Male model was an option I just had too low self esteem or I might of went for it LOL . Link to post Share on other sites
inpeices Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Does anyone else struggle with the dilemma of having a partner who is significantly more attractive than you?. I do and it sucks my fiancé is an ex model. Alone I look decently attractive I'd give myself an honest 6.5 maybe 7 without make up maybe a little more if I get out the putty knife and glob that **** on. But he on the other hand is a 9 or 9.5 in looks. It just tough. Sometimes rude people will point out how much more attractive he is than me. " like how did you manage to snag this guy" etc. All of his friends tried to convince him he could do better. I know it shouldn't bother me. He tells me I'm beautiful inside and out and he likes that I don't wear much make up. But I can't help feeling inadequate especially when I see a picture of us together and he looks like he just popped out of a magazine and I look like I need some serious tLc. Weight isn't a problem I'm fit and not over weight, just compared to him I'm an ugly duckling. Having read your last thread.. I don't think you have anything to worry about at all.. You sound perfectly matched! He feels inadequate in the bedroom and you feel inadequate in looks.. You say you are satisfied in the bedroom and he says he adores you.. Quit worrying and start enjoying! ;-) Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Shoot I'd love to have this problem. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ColdandLonelyinAK Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Yes, I do understand. People were always like "wow, I wasn't expecting your boyfriend to be so attractive!" when I was with the ex. It hurt sometimes, but he never seemed to have a problem with my looks. If he actually says something, or doesn't want to be intimate anymore, that's when I would worry. He obviously loves you for you, and accepts your looks, so I wouldn't worry about others. Link to post Share on other sites
MightyHeracross Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) If other people are pointing that out, it's their problem, their insecurities, not yours. Just remember that. If he really is that much better looking, then consider yourself lucky. When he was a model, the hottest girls probably flung themselves at him. But he saw through them and chose you. You mean something to him. As long as you're happy with him, that's all that matters. Edited July 3, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 At least he IS legitimately hot. I've had such average guys think that they were soooo much better than me. One of them so had his mates lament that he could do better than me. The sad truth is, I was the attractive one in the relationship 3 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 i have thought this way in the past.....and the only thing i can say is when i do have thoughts like that when i have dated good looking guys.....is that i am the one who is thinking in the shallow end...and i see the guy i am dating or have dated sees more than just what i look like and maybe i should too see me for more than the sum of my body parts...........deb 1 Link to post Share on other sites
regine_phalange Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I had a boyfriend whose twin could be this guy (except the dimples he's identical. eyebrows, eyes, nose, lips, skin tone, even the small moles). I, on the other hand, let's say didn't compare at all to his physical appearance. But we still had a strong psychosomatic bond. He was my longest relationship. He thought I looked stunning. I need to confess that his taste in women has always been a bit weird. Which I took total advantage of! The fact that a man is handsome doesn't mean he has a "normal" taste. I thought it was fun when several women told me straight ahead "what did he see in you??". I felt the jealousy and it felt goooood to reply "I can't tell you". 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts