miss_jaclynrae Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 Did you have one? If not, what did you do instead? Will you have one? Is money a factor, or something else? Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 Did you have one? If not, what did you do instead? Will you have one? Is money a factor, or something else? Every reception I've been to had an open bar. I've never been married, so I can't say about the money issue. . But I see no problem with having a paid bar. I mean are your friends there to celebrate your wedding or get free drinks? You could also consider just having wine and beer available. I'm sure you will figure it out. You will be fine. Link to post Share on other sites
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 Every reception I've been to had an open bar. I've never been married, so I can't say about the money issue. . But I see no problem with having a paid bar. I mean are your friends there to celebrate your wedding or get free drinks? You could also consider just having wine and beer available. I'm sure you will figure it out. You will be fine. I am not asking for myself exactly. Just curious about how people have handled it. I know for us, if we get married, having alcohol will be completely up to him. With him being a recovering alcoholic, if he feels better not having alcohol at our wedding then I am all for it. Course, we wouldn't be having a big wedding anyways, and if the people invited wanted to throw a hissy about no alcohol I wouldn't want them there anyways. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 Understood. My mistake. Link to post Share on other sites
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 Understood. My mistake. It's all good! Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 It's all good! I'm sure you will have a wonderful marriage too. I can't imagine a guy not wanting to marry you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mercuryshadow Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 We are having an open bar for beer and wine only, and spirits/cocktails will be available for cash/tab. The reason for this is indeed money. We were lucky enough to find a very accommodating venue with great menu options and inclusions, but having an open bar for 5 hours would put us too close to the max for our budget. I just felt it was safer this way (we'll have some breathing room for other costs) and I doubt guests will mind. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 We are having an open bar for beer and wine only, and spirits/cocktails will be available for cash/tab. The reason for this is indeed money. We were lucky enough to find a very accommodating venue with great menu options and inclusions, but having an open bar for 5 hours would put us too close to the max for our budget. I just felt it was safer this way (we'll have some breathing room for other costs) and I doubt guests will mind. This sounds reasonable. I'm not in the process of getting married, but I like this idea. I'm not a fan of cash bars at weddings, although I've never been to a wedding where that was the case. All the weddings I've attended had open bars and it just is a lot nicer for guests. But having some alcohol complimentary and others cash is a nice compromise. Link to post Share on other sites
CherryT Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 We will definitely be having an open bar. We may limit the when the hard liquor stops flowing... We're budgeting for the open bar and great food. Other priority items are things like music, video/photography, and venue. I'm ok with budgeting less for the dress, flowers, etc. We will have an open bar of wine and beer throughout the whole night but are thinking about limited the hard liquor to about 9 or 10 pm. We want everyone to have fun but at the same time not get so obliterated that it becomes a mess. Oh, have I seen messes at weddings. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mercuryshadow Posted October 4, 2013 Share Posted October 4, 2013 We will definitely be having an open bar. We may limit the when the hard liquor stops flowing... We're budgeting for the open bar and great food. Other priority items are things like music, video/photography, and venue. I'm ok with budgeting less for the dress, flowers, etc. We will have an open bar of wine and beer throughout the whole night but are thinking about limited the hard liquor to about 9 or 10 pm. We want everyone to have fun but at the same time not get so obliterated that it becomes a mess. Oh, have I seen messes at weddings. Yes, this is also a reasonable idea. We may opt for full open bar for a couple of hours, as we haven't finalized our menu yet. My sister set the bar a few years ago when she got married. She was able to do a full open bar and pretty nice buffet for a mere $60 per person!! My fiancé and I were not able to find anything like that, but prices have undoubtedly gone up. Our venue is very reasonable, and the options are endless, so we can customize. We're still able to stay well within budget, but it was hard to find!! Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted October 4, 2013 Share Posted October 4, 2013 Purely cash bar is really tacky imo. If you are gonna have a cash bar then you should just have a dry wedding. I've been to weddings where either beer & wine are free all night and mixed drinks are cash or where everything is open for a couple hours and then it's all cash. I think both of those are fine. The only thing with opening the bar for 2 hours or whatever, is that at the end of the 2 hours when they make the announcement, people went and took like 4 drinks per person which kinda defeats the purpose of cash later cause they aren't gonna NEED more drinks!!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted October 4, 2013 Author Share Posted October 4, 2013 When we get married, it will be a TINY wedding, if we have one at all. Family and close friends, and we don't have much of either. We will either provide beer/wine/champ/soda, or if the mister wants a dry wedding we will do that. He is a recovering alcoholic, so if he doesn't want people drunk at our wedding that is fine with me! My family can get a wee bit rambunctious, and I am sure all of them would LOVE to drink. It is OUR day though, and if he feels more comfortable with a dry wedding then so be it! If he WASN'T a recovering alcoholic, I would do free beer/wine/champ/soda and a cash bar. Link to post Share on other sites
nescafe1982 Posted October 4, 2013 Share Posted October 4, 2013 Not married, but my brother had a "stock the bar" party at his house a few weeks before the wedding. Basically, the party went like this: he ordered a couple kegs of beer and had a BBQ for around 100 people, all of whom were wedding guests. Each guest brought a bottle for the bar. There was a registry for bottles and everything. That way, the bar was stocked with whatever the guests wanted, and my brother avoided having one of those gift registries filled with slotted spoons and what-not. The guests stocked the bar but no gifts beyond that were expected. I think money was the biggest motivator for that move. Hosting your own bar can get very pricey. Link to post Share on other sites
Eggplant Posted October 5, 2013 Share Posted October 5, 2013 A cash bar is horribly tacky. The host provides the food and drink. If you can't afford it, don't have a bar at all. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted October 5, 2013 Share Posted October 5, 2013 When we get married, it will be a TINY wedding, if we have one at all. Family and close friends, and we don't have much of either. We will either provide beer/wine/champ/soda, or if the mister wants a dry wedding we will do that. He is a recovering alcoholic, so if he doesn't want people drunk at our wedding that is fine with me! My family can get a wee bit rambunctious, and I am sure all of them would LOVE to drink. It is OUR day though, and if he feels more comfortable with a dry wedding then so be it! If he WASN'T a recovering alcoholic, I would do free beer/wine/champ/soda and a cash bar. My twin sister had a super small wedding--immediate family and his bff & her bff. It was literally 17 people! Small weddings are beautiful & romantic, love how personal they are 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted October 5, 2013 Share Posted October 5, 2013 We had a very informal wedding. We were married at a local chapel and had a reception at the clubhouse in my Mom's condominium group. 50 of our closest friends and family and we bought a bunch of cases of beer and a bunch of bottles of liquor for everyone. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted October 5, 2013 Author Share Posted October 5, 2013 My twin sister had a super small wedding--immediate family and his bff & her bff. It was literally 17 people! Small weddings are beautiful & romantic, love how personal they are That will be us! 7 people in his family, 10 in mine, and that is with 4 nephews! Then just our best friends. I am so worried about how awkward it will be when our families meet! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
onlyjs Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 When I got married, I had an open bar. I got married on a Sunday evening - I personally thing it is tacky not to have an open bar. But, it's your budget. Personally my ex and I were drinkers and so were our friends, I think it is obvious to have an open bar. Budget wouldn't be an issue, because I view open bar like food - obvious for me. Next time I get married, I probably won't have a "wedding" like the first time, but I won't ever not have an open bar. That's just me. I won't judge those that choose otherwise. Link to post Share on other sites
jenkruger Posted November 21, 2013 Share Posted November 21, 2013 I'm planning my wedding right now and have spoken to several women co-workers. They all agree cash bar is a big no-no. However, if you have a tight budget, then thats the way to go. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted November 21, 2013 Share Posted November 21, 2013 Open bar or no bar or beer & wine or consumption bar . . . doesn't really matter as long as your guests don't have to pay. Cash bar is tacky. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted November 23, 2013 Share Posted November 23, 2013 Did you have one? If not, what did you do instead? Will you have one? Is money a factor, or something else? Nope, didn't have one. We had champagne and cider that was provided. Money was a factor, but also considering there are alcoholics in my family, it would have been an overall bad idea. Link to post Share on other sites
Kizza Posted November 23, 2013 Share Posted November 23, 2013 Where I am from an Open Bar is a bad idea. I would put wine - red/white/sparkling on each table and have a cash bar for people who want to buy alternative alcohol. I don't think it is tacky, I think it is smart: *Save money which is better spent else where than virtually down the toilet once your guests expel the free tab *Save on drunken idiots at your wedding win win win 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted November 24, 2013 Share Posted November 24, 2013 Open bar came with our reception package so we didn't have to pay additional for it or anything. Ordinarily I would say that having a cash bar would be a bit tacky, if you are looking to save money then offering wine and beer and having a cash bar for other alcohol would be a good alternative. As far as your boyfriend being a recovering alcoholic, that's a little different. It does depend a lot on how long he has been sober, as many recovering alcoholics who have long term sobriety are used to be around alcohol and are fine with not drinking in those types of social situations. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 We will be having an open bar with just about everything under the sun. My family is Italian, so they like their wine...and his is Irish, so they like their *insert liquor/beer here*. We somehow went from "let's have something small and casual" to a 250-person dinner/drinks/dancing bash at a beautiful theatre downtown. Oh well...it will be a blast. Link to post Share on other sites
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