Lovers, then friends, but I want to be lovers again

[Reltubsirch0412]

Ten years ago I was involved with a woman for about two months. Things got sexual on the third date. I lost my virginity to her. The sex was good for both of us. But her mother didn't like me because I'm well-educated and have a masters degree (the mother was a high-school dropout and the woman I dated never went to college). We came from different backgrounds. To top that off, the job I had at the time was a nightmare, and my bosses were making my life a living hell. So, lots of things going on outside the relationship that made our lives difficult.

 

She ended it because she said we have nothing in common. She wanted a friends with benefits relationship, but before we could set that in motion I had to leave for another job in another city, because the one I had was so miserable.

 

Yet over the course of the past 10 years we've communicated regularly on Facebook. She was married for about a year, but her mom didn't like that other guy, either....so she eloped and went against her mother's wishes, which caused her and her mom to have an acrimonious relationship for a long time. That marriage lasted a year before she ended it and reconciled with her mom.

 

As I already said, I since had to move away for employment reasons. First, I lived about 1,000 miles away. For the past seven years, I've lived 300 miles away from her. We're both in our late 30s, and she still lives with her parents.

 

She's talked often about how great it is that we're still friends, even though we physically haven't seen each other in a decade now. I've gone to her for advice on other women. She's always come through. She's still single. I think she wants to date but has had too many bad experiences with online dating.

 

I wasn't very experienced at dating when we were together. She was only my second girlfriend. Now, however, I've had five or six girlfriends and have probably gone on dates with 150 or so women. I'm way more experienced now, dating wise and in terms of my sexual experiences. And of all the women I've been with, I honestly enjoyed her company the most. She made me laugh. I love her personality. We had a certain chemistry that I've never had with anyone else. The best sex I ever had was with her.

 

I've had a few sex dreams about her recently. After one dream, I woke up around 3 a.m., half asleep and groggy and said out loud that I still loved her. I think I always will love her.

 

I've often considered contacting her and telling her how I still feel. But she was the one who ended things 10 years ago, so I feel she should be the one to broach that subject. And I don't think she's up for a long-distance relationship. Even if I relocated to her city, I think she'd still feel bothered by the differences in our background and our educations.

 

Thoughts?

 

Am I wasting my time still thinking about her?

 

If she wanted to get back together would she say something?

 

Do people generally have emotional hangups over the people they lost their virginity too, and I'm just an idiot for letting my mind think about her still?

[preraph]

You've got nothing to lose by asking but seems like the only relationship that can last is a long distance one because she's still holding onto mommy's apron strings.