Are we friends or more?

[tomparsons557]

So I have a "friend" and sometimes when we are alone we are close and holding hands with interlocking fingers, stroking arms. This is not something I would do with a friend. But it never seems to progress to real kissing. We often kiss on the lips goodbye, but she never lingers. The one time I tried she kept pulling her lips away, but seemed happy being close.

 

I am really confused to be honest - I don't get all the cuddling and hand holding if it is not progressing (which has been going on for 6 weeks now). Sometimes also when we meet up she is standoffish and this stuff never happens, and she just kisses my cheek to say goodbye which I find quite cold and unaffectionate. Other times if I hold her hand as we walk she presses her body close to mine. I also have noticed she introduces me to people as her friend. So I really find all the behaviour contradictory!

 

Any ideas why someone would behave like this? I really like her, but am starting to think she is just leading me on. We were friends for a year before any of the hand holding/cuddling started, so I really don't get why she would lead me in this way if she valued our friendship, because I would think its obvious I might get annoyed at some point (and she knows I really like her because when we were first friends I told her I wanted more, and she said she wanted to be friends only)

[Satu]

snip

Any ideas why someone would behave like this? I really like her, but am starting to think *she is just leading me on. We were friends for a year before any of the hand holding/cuddling started, so I really don't get why she would lead me in this way if she valued our friendship, because I would think its obvious I might get annoyed at some point (and she knows I really like her because when we were first friends I told her I wanted more, and **she said she wanted to be friends only)

 

*Thats right, she is.

 

**Unless she tells you otherwise, that what she wants.

[preraph]

So I have a "friend" and sometimes when we are alone we are close and holding hands with interlocking fingers, stroking arms. This is not something I would do with a friend. But it never seems to progress to real kissing. We often kiss on the lips goodbye, but she never lingers. The one time I tried she kept pulling her lips away, but seemed happy being close.

 

I am really confused to be honest - I don't get all the cuddling and hand holding if it is not progressing (which has been going on for 6 weeks now). Sometimes also when we meet up she is standoffish and this stuff never happens, and she just kisses my cheek to say goodbye which I find quite cold and unaffectionate. Other times if I hold her hand as we walk she presses her body close to mine. I also have noticed she introduces me to people as her friend. So I really find all the behaviour contradictory!

 

Any ideas why someone would behave like this? I really like her, but am starting to think she is just leading me on. We were friends for a year before any of the hand holding/cuddling started, so I really don't get why she would lead me in this way if she valued our friendship, because I would think its obvious I might get annoyed at some point (and she knows I really like her because when we were first friends I told her I wanted more, and she said she wanted to be friends only)

 

So you're waiting for her to take it to the next level? That's usually going to be the man who needs to take that initiative. Just lay one on her and see what happens.

[Frank13]

You have what is called a romantic friendship.

 

Per Wikipedia - "A romantic friendship or passionate friendship is a very close but typically non-sexual relationship between friends, often involving a degree of physical closeness beyond that which is common in the contemporary Western societies. It may include for example holding hands, cuddling, hugging, kissing, and sharing a bed, or co-sleeping, without sexual intercourse."

[thecrucible]

Has she broken up with anyone recently? The reason I ask is that sometimes straight after a break up, you might start reaching out for people for romance, not necessarily people who were on your radar before.

 

I think you have to take what she says but if you hit on her after she's teased she like it, well she can't really blame you (and by hit on her I mean go for a kiss if you think she is trying to get close to you). But if you are hesitating then maybe something about it just doesn't feel right in your gut?

[Honourably honest]

Is this a BFF scenario?