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When Harry Met Sally


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Think of this movie. This is what our friendship is like with my good guy friend. And we both have even stated so. We have come short of doing the wildly good fun deed, as we are both waiting for marriage (whenever and with whomever that will be with).

 

We have both have agreed to remain friends as he is afraid he will not be able to handle my quirks. I have similarly taken a look at his own quirks and feel I can handle them wonderfully so. That's what love is partially about, isn't it?!! Instead, he has suggested we become business partners so he can decipher his feelings for me.

 

In the mean time, both he and I have begun dating; other people. Since this has happened, his interest has grown a little for me as he is taking initiative in telling me how he has been thinking about me, wishing me good night, and wanting to hang out. I have been on half a dozen dates with a fellow I am enjoying getting to know now too. It's difficult for each of us to listen to one another with our love interests, but at the same time, it's like we are keeping tabs on one another as well.

 

How long will this go on for? I am more crazy for him than I am with my new love interest. I have made the decision to not stop dating this new fellow in order to make myself available for my friend if he spontaneously decides to grow a pair to ask me out. I feel it would be unfair as I have given him plenty of time and opportunity to ask me out. He knows how I feel about him.

My fear is that if my friend does decide to ask me out while I am dating someone else, and if I do say no, that he will decide not to ask me out for a long while if I do become single again.

 

Thoughts? I dislike that he has to work out his own heart problems, but if his heart is ever available, I want all of him.

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it sounds like he knows you like him more, so he is keeping you interested through friendship/business partnership, etc. in the event the other relationship(s) fail. what you're doing is making yourself a backup choice for him instead of finding someone who wants you as their #1. you have to think more of yourself and go for someone who can return your interest; it sounds like this person isn't willing to do that. and you're lying to yourself if you think he is a friend. a friend is platonic, when you like someone, or hope for a love relationship from a friendship it is not a friendship. you are calling it something in the hopes it morphs into more, if you have feelings for him you are pursuing, or trying to pursue, a romance. he is 'hoping to develop feelings for you' - that is code for 'i don't like you but i will keep you around to kiss and possibly sleep with if you let me'

Edited by newmoon
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