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I sleep with my roommate but I don't know what he wants from me.


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Look, I sleep with my roommate all the time because he is hands down the best sex I have ever had, and lemme tell you, I've had a LOT of sex. I mean, this guy is a GOD. Anyway, I'm happy with our current intimacy level - snuggling, going to dinner, having unbelievable sex, being affectionate, being close friends... we've known each other for years... but I am concerned he's starting to view me as his girlfriend. I'm not sleeping with anyone else but I just got out of a long relationship a month ago and I don't want to jump into another one. Plus my roommate isn't really the sort of person I can see myself staying with in the long term; there are some fundamental incompatibilities there which are very important to me. But I also don't want to hurt him. He is very dear to me. Please advise.

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You need to be honest with him. He does deserve to know your intentions. You shouldn't string him along which is what you would be doing if you didn't tell him your intentions.

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Jeez, if you're enjoying it that much, just enjoy the ride. If you've known him for years and he's never tried to marry you, it's unlikely he's going to start now. If he does, you'll have to reassess. Remember no one is perfect and waking up with someone you're attracted to is worth something as long as they're not bad to you.

 

P.S. take it from an old child of the seventies, men who are truly excellent in bed come around about as often as a comet. Of course, you can try to train them, but it's never quite the same, is it?

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Probably time to have the "friends with benefits" conversation with your roommate? Time to manage expectations, before things get out of control, and one of you ends up having to break your share of the lease to move out.

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