Is it Lust or Love

[Mysterio]

I am a 43 yr old Black male. I have a white 33 year old female friend. Her name is JC.

 

We met at a halloween party. We get together every 2 months or so. I wonder what is wrong with me in this stage of my life. I guess I have to have everything just so. Its like I am constantly playing Chess with my life.

 

I took out JC for her B-day. I have always felt that she was pretty. For some reason. This last time I took her out I felt these types of emotions like I wanted to hold hands and even kiss/make out with her at some point. I don't know if its because we were walking around the park and having Ice Cream. I resisted because I don't know if its love or lust.

 

CJ is single. I am single. Yet I don't know if she is looking at me that way. I say if she was. Then there would be way more interaction between us. Just looking at us from a guys side of things. I say if a woman is romantically attracted to a guy. She is basically in his life and basically in his face so to speak.

 

Any insight. I could just be addicted to love. I don't want to get involved only to just find out its just a stupid love thing. Or If she was really into me. We would be hanging out a little more. Our friendship feels more straight and less flirty, yet we enjoy each others company and talk a lot when we are together. She is looking to. We are both childless and never married. I like that as I want the woman I eventually settle down with to be in the same sort of space as I.

[preraph]

I think most people start out in love with love. Love is something you have to explore. And there's all types and levels of love. You feel something for this woman, and I just think what you have to do is begin asking her out more. There are little touches you can do and her reaction will tell you if she's uncomfortable with that or not. It's old-fashioned, I know. But like you're walking through a door, put your flat hand on her back and guide her through. If you go for coffee or food somewhere, get up to leave before she does and offer her your hand to get out of the chair. If you go to a movie or concert, put your arm around the back of her chair. If she resists any of this harmless polite stuff, or seems to stiffen up about it, she's probably friendzoned you. But if she seems to appreciate it or returns any touches whatsoever, hand on arm, anything, she's probably open to you putting your arm around her while walking down the street and then a goodnight kiss.