Terrence_chua Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 Alright so this is my first post in this forum.. Yeap. So I've known her since 2011 and we have been best friends ever since. We confide in each other in practically everything and so we essentially know everything about each other. We both mutually agreed that our bond is similar to that of what "soul mates" share though perhaps her opinion of our friendship is more inclined towards platonic. She has been attached with her boyfriend since 2010 and her current boyfriend is her first. Her boyfriend is a pretty amazing guy; has almost everything you could ask for out of a guy and so I felt pretty happy for her back then though she faces her fair shares of ups and downs in her relationship- which is pretty normal in any functional relationship. I only became cognizant of my feelings for her last year before I left overseas for an internship program and the five months away from her well... It was an ordeal for me. Being unable to meet up with her in person and etc. However, lately I've begun to feel.. Well guilty with how I am feeling towards her because I feel as though I cant be happy for her; I felt jealous and a little bit spiteful.. I felt disgusted with myself. And these thoughts were beginning to take a toll on me so I decided to come clean with her and I confessed to her. My intentions though were not to break her up with her boyfriend-maybe a small part of me had those thoughts- but to ensure that I could keep a distance from her and move on. When I confessed to her, she told me she understood my decision and that she would always be there for me and that she would wait for me to return as her friend again. The issue for me is that she also told me that had she not been attached with her current boyfriend.. She thinks she would've been in love with me but she quickly added that she hopes that I will not wait for her to end things with her boyfriend or something. So I asked her if there was any point of time she was ever interested in me.. she said yes. So I'm in crossroads here. Should I move on from her? Because I am convinced she is the right girl for me. She has virtually all the qualities that I look out for in an ideal partner and I do believe if given the chance well.. We would make a great couple. But she is happily attached. I don't know if I made the right choice to confess to her but right now.. I'm just lost. Link to post Share on other sites
LoverOfDance Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 (edited) Yes, move on. If you have good moral character and any respect for her relationship, just let it be. Then again, it's really all up to you to do whatever you think is right. I was in this exact same situation two years ago except he was just my friend and not my best friend. When he first found out how I felt, it seemed like he wanted to give us a chance, seemed like he felt something... But I wasn't ready to get myself involved in a triangle or steal another woman's boyfriend. Although I really really wanted to see how it would be between us if we were together because I really believe we had a connection, I had to let it go. He still acts like he cares about me even today. Reads my statuses, wants to know what I'm doing, how I'm doing, bla bla bla. But it doesn't matter. He's with someone else and that's the simple fact. I have to try and accept that and believe that everything will be fine. Just let things work themselves out. Whether they work out in your favour or not. U'll be fine with or without her. Trust me. Edited April 19, 2014 by LoverOfDance Link to post Share on other sites
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