My mini-rant on "platonic" relationships, "friend-zone", etc

[y2k]

And I really want the female opinion on these things. I'm reading a lot of threads on this part of the board. One of the things I hate reading the most is when girls fall in love with a friend, they freak out.

 

Why freak out??? This makes no sense. Look at it like this, if you ever get married for real, and the guy (or girl) you marry is the one you really want, your platonic relationships with other people of the opposite sex will end. Automatic. Nothing more than just calling maybe once a year to see whats up and even that will fade away in time.

 

The issue of girls (or guys) freaking out over falling in love with their friend should not even be an issue at all. It's all stupidity. If you fall in love with someone, and if you have any reason to believe that someone could feel the same way, you HAVE TO GO FOR IT.

 

Now about the guys who freak out about being "friend-zoned". I'll tell you that most girls almost automatically in their heads tell how they'll see a guy pretty quickly. And there's not much you can do about it. But they are almost never analyzing and never get to the point where they say "I don't know if I want to see this guy as a romantic interest or a friend", and make the decision within a period of time.

 

If a girl had real interest in you, and you blew it (by acting dumb or weak, etc), they won't want to legitimately be your friend. If you are around a girl, and she has interest, and you don't act within a legit amount of time (6 months max and that's liberal), she'll just stop chilling with you because you never acted.

 

That's the way it is. If you really only end up being her friend, it's because she never saw you like that to begin with. It's like with us guys. We can hang out with girls, but we know within small time which girls triggers that inner animal in us and which don't. Almost nothing the girls that didn't attract that inner thing in us do can change the way we see them.

 

Opinions please.

[DreamerGirl27]

ummm absolutely, most definitely, girls can be friends with guys and have it be platonic. Or more along the lines of like a "brother/sister" relationship, or family feel to it.

[mhottucker]

Now about the guys who freak out about being "friend-zoned". I'll tell you that most girls almost automatically in their heads tell how they'll see a guy pretty quickly. And there's not much you can do about it. But they are almost never analyzing and never get to the point where they say "I don't know if I want to see this guy as a romantic interest or a friend", and make the decision within a period of time......

 

That's the way it is. If you really only end up being her friend, it's because she never saw you like that to begin with. It's like with us guys. We can hang out with girls, but we know within small time which girls triggers that inner animal in us and which don't. Almost nothing the girls that didn't attract that inner thing in us do can change the way we see them.

 

Opinions please.

 

So what do you think about the couples who have been friends for years before they ever got together. I think a womens proscetive changes as they do or as they need it to. And just because you are not a couple now does not mean there is not a time where you will be. Every women is different. I know a guy who was married remained friends with a women who was also married and now they are seeing each other after years of being married. But by the same token i also am in a friendship with his niece who got hurt bad and doesnt want a boyfriend. Just wants a guy around to go places with and hang with but nothing more. Every women has her needs and wants and fills then with who she sees fit to take care of them.