Jump to content

friend keeps lying to me and now wont talk now Ive confronted her?


Recommended Posts

Hi,

 

what a great site this is. Hope maybe some people might be able to shed some light for me? I dont want to loose her as a friend but I think I have?

 

 

my female mate who Ive gotten along with so well for the last 7-8 months has started to lie to me in the last month(I can see straight though her when she lies, she's not very good at it as she has a conscious), now Ive confronted her 3 days ago she wont talk at all as of last night. The lies started to come thick and fast when she was at my place the other night for a short visit. But we had a few reds(3 bottles:p) and it wasnt such a short visit. She was saying she didnt want to leave and it not fair she cant stay etc etc sexually frustrated as can be. She said her kids were with her mum(which I could tell was a lie) so I called her bluff and said scotty will be fine with them and stuff him, he does worse to you. She tried to stand her ground and insisted they were with her mum. So we said goodbye's. Stupid guy sent me a text claiming to be mum after she'd left about 4am, lol.

 

In the last 3 days she has ramped up the lies and stuffs me around saying that she wants to catch up so we can talk. I just asked her why she is telling white lies(tried to be tactful) and if we could catch up as it upsets me dearly. I know she has a guy staying with her and I really dont care but I hate the fact that she lies. She says she hates him and tell me everything he does that she hates almost to the point of her wanting me to punch him out but I just left and didnt want to get involved as I guess I had a feeling of mis-trust and I think my instincts are proving right?

 

OK, kids are new to me(32) as Ive never dated a woman(28) with kids(6 and 18mths). And I may have stuffed up? Being me Im very cautious with new partners and didnt want to jump in to anything to quick as I like this girl alot. She used to cuddle me and kiss me in front of the kids which I wasnt into at all, yes I liked her but I didnt want them calling me dad and we work out that were not compatible a few months later. Anyways little one calls me dad now and I sorts of dont mind but me and my mate are not sexually physical at all. She like the idea of me being a father figure for them and brings it up quite often.

 

Im starting to think the longer I wait for her to contact me after her lies and stuffing me around waiting for her, this girl isnt worth my energy but I want to hear her response to my q's?

 

EDIT: Im not waiting but Im not getting any response??? Im still calling, txtn and now winding her mate up about his text. I want to go see her but I cant get there for a few days.

 

confused and running out of idea's

 

TIA

Edited by dingo77
added a bit more info... and updates
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

the more I look at this I think Ive just been used, talking with her partner(that she says she doesnt have) now were both just an ego boost?

Link to post
Share on other sites
Cracker Jack

This doesn't sound like a good situation at all. Too much lying.

 

I don't think you need to continue reaching out for her at this point. Allow her to do that. If she doesn't, you're not missing anything.

Link to post
Share on other sites
whichwayisup

Why would you want someone who continually lies, in your life? This woman and the dynamic here is unhealthy. Think long term. She doesn't sound trustworthy ,or sound like someone you can have a loving, honest relationship or friendship with . Why bother? What are you getting out of it? Again, think long term, not in the heat of the moment.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

I dont want a liar, only thing worse I think is a thief...

 

Crackerjack, thanks I agree and thats what Im thinking/doing.

 

I did finally get a few words out of her yesterday "Im not playing games with you. your just jumping to conclusions without answers "

 

Dont know about that, I know the truth and not from her it seems. When I ask questions I got lies? I also spoke to her so called mum(guy looking after her kids that night) and were getting along better than her and us, lol.

 

she said whe will also drop around for a chat monday. I'm not wasting any more energy on her and I doubt our chat will fix things, but Im willing to give it a go.

 

whichwayisup - tks, Im thinking its a pretty unhealthy start too, she would want to have a pretty good answer and trust is something she would have to gain again... What Im getting out of, until last month a great friend, fun times, good company and a woman I could see myself very happy with for a long time. But Im starting to have second thoughts of course now...

 

thanks for your replies!

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...