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I really not want to be punished by this


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[color=red][/color] Should I tell him I am not in love with him? but he still thinks I am in love with him and he avoid me, but I really not love him. And he think I distroyed his love by intention, coz I accidently put off the phone on the wall when he is taliking with a girl he loves I think and the girl get very angy and said to him, " Is that your girlfriend?" And he became very angry too, said to the girl" That girl(it means me) can do anything." Then all the bad things happen to me coz at that time I were to live in that flat with him and several other guys.

 

He did not give me any good feelings and I feel very sad and I got very angry too and I think when he was ready to love me I still not forgive him and in sadness I left that flat and later after a while I wrote to him, saying about something similar that I am not the girl of his type. He got very angry and broke my window.

 

And I fell into sadness since then and to now and I find evertime I think of him and the unhappy things, I easily cry. But all that happened is because the wall- phone I accidently put off the wall two years from now. I find I am getting older than my real age, I am 23 now. But I began to have wrinkles near my eyes . When I began to forget the unhappy things two years from now. I accidently met him in the same working place( a part time job) this holiday. I gave him an bad eye contact because he made me not happy this two years and he immediately got very angry and later I asked him for help, he helped me. But several days later maybe, he said to the boss he would leave for a holiday and I thought he chose not to meet me. I just feel so guilty and sad again.

And when I try to explain everything, I just look down on myself and I just feel very afraid of him. What happen to me? What should I do? I really need a relief from this sadness. Anyone can help me?

Or should I go to see a psychic advisor? I found I am really broken because of him.

 

It was that I could love him and not love him, but now I just felt I ask for his acceptance, maybe, what happened to my mind? I were not sad when I met him, and I didn't care for working there or not. That is, I did not force myself to work there or be with him coz the boss only said when she were busy, then she would call me, and around two weeks later the boss called me back. But when I found he were not working there anymore, I just felt very sad and to now. I think I only asked for his acceptance as a human beings only maybe I am not in love with him. But this can be strange, coz I think I love him, but I won't force a love really. why I always ask for his acceptance as a human being ? I don't know what is happening to my mind? Should I see a doctor or something. I really can't stand this. Evey time I think of him I felt very sad and I can't study anymore. Really need your advice to help me to get of this pain.

 

 

Anny

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You do not need the love and acceptance of any particular person so don't try to force it. Continuing to allow this man to affect you in such negative ways is not good.

 

Forgive yourself for all that has happened and move on with your life. There seems to be no future with this man and that's OK. Once you have made the decision not to allow his memory to affect your life in such dramatic ways, you will move forward and meet someone who is nice and who will treat you well.

 

There is nothing wrong with you except you are obsessing about something that is completely over and is not healthy for you. Life cannot be lived backwards. Let the past go and look forward to some good, positive things for yourself.

 

If you feel you may need a counsellor to discuss your feelings with, by all means do so. But the sooner you let go of this guy and all things that have to do with him, the sooner you will be able to go on with your life.

 

YOU have control of your emotions so get yourself together and STOP doing things to make yourself feel bad.

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HokeyReligions

Tony is right.

 

Something you said that bothered me

He got very angry and broke my window
is sending up red flags.

 

This sounds violent and you need to avoid this man. You also said you were afraid of him. If you cannot avoid him at work, then seek counseling and tell your employer that you are afraid of him and why. Perhaps your boss can help set your schedules so that you don't run into this guy at work. Or look for another job. If you accidently see him outside of work, avoid him and don't put yourself in a place where you are likely to run into him.

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