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This is my first time asking for advice. I met Leanna two months ago. We work in the same building different floors. I visit her and she seems happy to talk to me. She tells me everything with in a 15- 20 minute time span that I talk to her. She compliments me. She asks about my day. I think she may be interested. But, today at lunch I saw eating lunch with a guy. Should I see her again on a visit again, or would I be pushing it with her. I don't want to mess it up with her. But, I want her to know that I am interested. She has said that she has no time for anything else. I know her college schedule. How can I develop a friendship with her outside of work. She is dropping me some hints but I don't yet understand them from her. She talks about her apartment with four tv's and she talks about looking for a new car.

 

Help. mac

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First of all, you have no idea who that guy was. I used to eat lunch with male coworkers all the time. Or maybe it was her brother. Or her cousin. Or her friend's husband. I wouldn't read anything into it if she's never mentioned a boyfriend. Of course you should visit her again. However, I will say, that usually when a girl says that she doesn't have time for anything else, it usually means she isn't interested romantically. Doesn't mean she doesn't like talking to you. I like talking to lots of guys that I wouldn't go out with on a date. However, the truth is, when people meet someone they are interested in and wild about, they will make time for that person, no matter how busy they are. (That's a very hard truth that I've finally had to face up to.) However, not everyone is like that I don't want to speak for this girl, but it is something to keep in mind. If you want to develop a friendship with her outside of work, ask her to see a movie or to go out for a drink or to grab coffee or to go to an art exhibit or whatever. All you have to do is ask. By her reaction, you'll see if she's interested in you or not. I wouldn't push it if you do go out, though. Take it slow.

 

I don't understand what you mean that she's dropping hints but you don't understand them. Like what? I also don't see what having 4 tvs and buying a new car has to do with anything. Sounds like small talk to me.

This is my first time asking for advice. I met Leanna two months ago. We work in the same building different floors. I visit her and she seems happy to talk to me. She tells me everything with in a 15- 20 minute time span that I talk to her. She compliments me. She asks about my day. I think she may be interested. But, today at lunch I saw eating lunch with a guy. Should I see her again on a visit again, or would I be pushing it with her. I don't want to mess it up with her. But, I want her to know that I am interested. She has said that she has no time for anything else. I know her college schedule. How can I develop a friendship with her outside of work. She is dropping me some hints but I don't yet understand them from her. She talks about her apartment with four tv's and she talks about looking for a new car. Help. mac
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When she throws out the hints, grab onto them. If she talks about looking for a car, ask her if you can come along sometime when she's looking. When she tells you about all her TV's, ask her if you can come over sometime and see what she does with all of them.

 

Hey, you've been talking to this girl for two months. You should have asked her out in some fashion by now. Maybe she's eating lunch with that other guy because she's given up on you.

 

If you don't go for it when the opportunity is there, it ain't gonna happen. It's not too late but you need to move NOW!!!

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Thank you for you thoughts. I do not know if I should have used the word, "hint." I don't know what you mean by small talk because everything what she says, reveals something about herself. I think that is a big step on her part to reveal something about herself to me. Before, Christmas, I did suggest to her if she would like to go have lunch at the mall, then afterwards browse through email. Later, that day, she mentioned that she has no money for lunch, and that she will go see her parents a week before christmas. She mentioned this to me before she even told her boss. I kind of think she has the personality of the person, who plays 'sabrina the teenage witch?' (you know that show right. I am not sure if that is the title). At work, she did go with me to the christmas party on the 5th floor. (she works on second floor). We were together about an hour for that day.

 

By the ways, how would you drop hints? maybe she has given them.

 

mac

First of all, you have no idea who that guy was. I used to eat lunch with male coworkers all the time. Or maybe it was her brother. Or her cousin. Or her friend's husband. I wouldn't read anything into it if she's never mentioned a boyfriend. Of course you should visit her again. However, I will say, that usually when a girl says that she doesn't have time for anything else, it usually means she isn't interested romantically. Doesn't mean she doesn't like talking to you. I like talking to lots of guys that I wouldn't go out with on a date. However, the truth is, when people meet someone they are interested in and wild about, they will make time for that person, no matter how busy they are. (That's a very hard truth that I've finally had to face up to.) However, not everyone is like that I don't want to speak for this girl, but it is something to keep in mind. If you want to develop a friendship with her outside of work, ask her to see a movie or to go out for a drink or to grab coffee or to go to an art exhibit or whatever. All you have to do is ask. By her reaction, you'll see if she's interested in you or not. I wouldn't push it if you do go out, though. Take it slow. I don't understand what you mean that she's dropping hints but you don't understand them. Like what? I also don't see what having 4 tvs and buying a new car has to do with anything. Sounds like small talk to me.
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Thanks for your advice! your advice is cool. Later that day, I went to visit her that day. I offered to help her with her schol. She accepted. She is a passive female I believe that.

 

So far I have been doing the asking, she grabs onto what she likes. She has accepted some, and gave legitimate reasons to not accept some. Why is it that men have to do all the asking in the begining?

 

mac

 

personal info: She watches 3 movies in one night, always on the computer. We met at orientation day for the job, later that day I gave her a ride to school. I think she just been hurt. She is around 20 years old. I think she likes what I have to offer so far, but she just want to makes sure. Well, I offered to look for a car with her. She is going to let a friend of her mother get one for her. She has no time to even look for a car. She lives alone. she did have a roommate.

When she throws out the hints, grab onto them. If she talks about looking for a car, ask her if you can come along sometime when she's looking. When she tells you about all her TV's, ask her if you can come over sometime and see what she does with all of them. Hey, you've been talking to this girl for two months. You should have asked her out in some fashion by now. Maybe she's eating lunch with that other guy because she's given up on you.

 

If you don't go for it when the opportunity is there, it ain't gonna happen. It's not too late but you need to move NOW!!!

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